Dazed (Connections, #2.5)(33)

Colored vases adorn the shiny granite topped reception area and soft music beats through the speakers. It’s quiet in the lobby and I stay out here for a long while with my head in my hands, just trying to think about nothing.

“Aerie, there you are,” Kay says, rushing my way. “My friend over at the Warner Bros. lot told me to come by on the pretense of an interview for the first issue of Sound Entertainment Magazine and I could grab a peak at the casting table. Come with me. I want you to meet my sister,” she implores.

I’m reluctant, but my curiosity wins out. “Sure, I’ll come. Let me just check in with Shelly and make sure the layouts I gave her on Friday have been accepted.”

***

“Judging by the nine-story-high billboards, I guess they tape Conan there.” Kay snorts as she pulls up to the Warner Bros. gate.

The guard directs her to a large parking structure across the street. I’m pretty sure if I had called Brett, we would have given me a drive-on. When she parks her Mercedes SLS, I notice we are the only car in this lot with California plates.

We cross the street and go through an airport-like security check where we have to show our IDs. Once we walk onto the lot, it’s clear we’re in Hollywood. Each soundstage has a sign indicating what movies are being filmed in them.

“We’re looking for Soundstage 5. My friend told me to look for Casablanca on the plaque.” Kay’s New York accent is more prominent than Jagger’s and it’s hard to miss the more excited she gets.

The building is a charming old structure with a tile roof. We pull open the door and there are two more doors to follow. We turn to the right where we can hear voices and stop in the open doorway. Peeking in the room, I make out Styrofoam lunch containers littering the surrounding area and a number of people sitting around a table. Cameramen are spread throughout the space and they move around cues I don’t understand.

“They’re doing a read through with my sister,” Kay gushes.

My eyes are drawn to the raspberry leather jacket, but cut to the blue quilted vest on the guy sitting beside her. I didn’t even know he was going to be here—did he? Chewing my thumbnail, I try to hear what they’re discussing.

“What are they doing?” I ask Kay.

“A read-through of sorts. No blocking though. My friend told me this morning that they’re going to take a number of couple pair ups and team them in different scenes to see who they want to invite back.”

Whoever her friend is, she’s well informed. The air blower overhead dies down and I can hear much better now.

Jagger as Ian: Look, for the last time I don’t give a f*ck what you do anymore. I’m done.

Jules as Madeline: Don’t say that. I told you I’m going to leave him. Just give me some time.

His accent is completely gone. He has the part down. He even says “f*ck” the way I told him my uncle used to say it. I remember my uncle saying it so clearly. It always sounded more like fck, than f*ck. My parents never swore and my uncle stayed on his best behavior around them. But he’d slip every now and then around me. I never swore—I went to an all-girls school where the nuns would have crucified us if we said “heck.” I still don’t.

“Considering the baggage between them, I have to say their chemistry is amazing.”

My head snaps toward Kay. “What do you mean ‘baggage’?”

“They dated for almost two years and then one day he just broke up with her and moved away.”

My heart seems to fail, my breathing stalls, and my mind wanders. I can’t see Jagger’s expression, but I really wish I could. Between the lines being recited and the thought of him with another woman—the gorgeous girl who has turned out to be his old girlfriend—everything around me fades away. Flashes of that morning in the rain come to mind. He saw her and never told me anything about it. He spoke to her. What else has he been doing with her? Red creeps up my face and spreads like fire through my body.

Jules as Madeline: I love you. Don’t say that.

Jagger as Ian: Madeline, I love you. You know that, but this is over.

His first words ring in my ears. The same three words he said to me yesterday, and it doesn’t seem like he’s acting. Oh my God, I really am the rebound girl.

“I wonder if she’ll pull a Carey Mulligan.”

All I can do is stare at her. The lump in my throat grows larger as I try to hold back my tears.

“Carey Mulligan as Daisy. They say she got that coveted role in The Great Gatsby because during her audition she just up and kissed Leonardo.”

My hand flies to my mouth. “Oh God.” My voice comes out almost unrecognizable to myself.

“Aerie, what’s the matter? I thought you’d be excited to see your uncle’s movie in the works. Who knows, those two,” she points to the table where raspberry jacket and blue vest are turned to us, “just might be the stars of No Led Zeppelin.”

“You know what, we should get back. Lunch is long over and we have work to do,” I say in a no-nonsense tone.

“I just want to see if they kiss.”

I can’t watch anymore. I don’t want to listen. I’m not even able to breathe. This morning’s revelations have been too much for me. I just found out that my uncle had a secret relationship that is being sensationalized for a movie, and now I find out Jagger and his ex-girlfriend are auditioning for those parts. “I’ll wait outside. I’m not sure we should be in here.”