By Virtue I Fall (Sins of the Fathers #3)(57)

Santino was panting, his abs constricting and his expression full of desire. His thumb rubbed my clit faster, and I clenched again.

“Let loose,” Santino said. I wasn’t sure what he meant, but I decided to focus on the sensations of him filling me, of his thumb circling my slick clit, of my fingers tugging at my nipples.

I didn’t move my hips, only allowed my walls to clench around Santino’s girth, and then my clit pulsated and the sensation coursed through my body. I cried out, clenching even more, and pinching my nipples almost painfully as I came.

“Just like that,” Santino rumbled, caressing my clit gently as I came down from my high. I dropped my hands and supported myself on his chest, panting as if I’d rode in a rodeo. Santino cupped my ass cheeks and squeezed. “Now you’re ready to ride me.”

I was more than ready. If possible, my orgasm had made me even hornier. I felt overly stimulated and ready to come again. It was an electrifying sensation I couldn’t get enough of. With my hands still pressed to his chest, I began to lift my hips slowly, letting Santino’s cock slide almost all the way out of me before I sank back down. I soon picked up pace and added rotation, until Santino’s expression was twisted with lust.

“I like feeling like I’m in control of you,” I pressed out as I clenched around him, causing him to let out a harsh moan.

Santino gave me a look I didn’t understand and his fingers on my ass cheeks tightened. I leaned down, catching his lips for a kiss. Santino cupped my head, deepening the kiss without hesitation.

I loved how Santino’s pelvic rubbed my clit in this position.

This felt more intense, but also closer. For a long time, Santino and I stared at each other while my hips moved slowly.

“You said every time that followed would be fucking,” I whispered harshly. “This doesn’t feel like fucking yet.”

A knowing gleam filled Santino’s eyes before one corner of his mouth darted up in a cocky grin. “I can give you all the fucking you want, no worries.”

I wasn’t sure it was what I wanted, not all I wanted, but it was what I had to settle for.

Santino gripped my hips and began to thrust upward with hard deep, strokes that echoed through my body like an earthquake. It hurt and felt impossibly good at the same time.

I clasped his forearms, needing to steady myself as he slammed into me over and over again, his pecs and abs straining from the effort, his expression harsh and lustful. “Tell me if it’s too much,” he gritted out.

I nodded, but I wouldn’t tell him, because this hard fucking, this side of Santino was safer for my heart, and that part of myself I wanted to protect more than a sore pussy.

When Santino came a few minutes later, he took me over the edge with him and I sagged down on his chest in a breathless heap. His heart beat furiously under my head and my own matched his in intensity. Santino’s hands glided up from my hips to caress my back and I allowed myself to enjoy the sensation before I straightened. By now it was light outside. I glanced at the clock on Santino’s nightstand.

“I need to get ready for classes.”

Santino nodded.

I climbed off him. He removed the condom. “Do you want me to throw it away? I’m heading into the bathroom anyway.”

“I’ll put it in the bin in the kitchen.”

I nodded, then grabbed my clothes from the floor and hurried toward the bathroom. When I stepped into the shower and allowed the warm water to massage my sore body, I was torn. I was ecstatic over what had happened, but at the same time, I wondered how we’d make it work. Sex without attachment. Commitment with an expiration date. Exclusivity or faithfulness?

I wanted more of what Santino and I had had, but I knew sometimes more was too much.





When I typed my daily email to Dante and Valentina the morning after I’d slept with Anna, I still felt a sense of disbelief over what had happened.

We’d fucked. Twice.

I’d taken Anna’s virginity and had asked her for exclusivity, how she put it. I wasn’t sure what had gotten into me. I’d never cared if any of the women I’d been with had slept with others. Naturally, they’d been married after all. But with Anna? The mere idea that she might be with someone else made me want to kill the person.

Just the thought that she’d be Cliffy’s one day made me want to kill the fucker now.

Part of me considered confessing everything to Dante. Not because I was trying to be noble and come clean with my Capo. I simply hoped he’d decide to cancel Anna’s engagement to Clifford.

Of course, self-preservation and rationality made me opt for lying. When Anna would marry Clifford in a few years, she and I had probably long lost interest in each other. Risking her reputation and my life only because I was obsessed with her now was absolutely idiotic.

I waited in the car for her in front of her fashion school as usual but when she got into the passenger seat this time, our interaction was strained. Usually, she said something provoking and I answered in turn, but this time she only smiled tensely and I couldn’t come up with something witty either. Fuck, this was the first time I acted like an idiot around a woman after sex.

I started the car, glad for the sound of the engine. We didn’t talk the entire car ride. Once back in our apartment, I prepared a strong coffee for us.

Anna cleared her throat. “I don’t like this. I want things to return to how they were before we had sex.”