Before I Let Go (Skyland #1)(23)

I could hear the truth in his words as I gasped for breath. I pressed my hand against my chest in an effort to relieve the tension that pulled there. He brought me here then he left me. He left me, and he didn’t dare say goodbye. My heart hammered as anger fueled me, but there was also so much regret. I should have spoken to him instead of storming out of his room. I should have told him the truth about how torn I was over the need to protect myself and the need to be near him.

“He left me.”

“He will do whatever it takes to protect our people. He has spent his entire life making sure we weren’t destroyed under his father and brother’s rule.”

Sorin slid off the counter and moved in front of me. He stared up at me as if he needed my full attention for the next words that passed his lips. “The people of this kingdom will follow Evren blindly wherever he asks them to go. We will do anything he asks of us, and we aren’t willing to do that because he’s like his brother. He is everything that his brother is not.”

“And what if you’re wrong?” I could hear the fear in my voice, the desperation to believe what he said about Evren to be true but the fear that it wasn’t.

“If you believe that”—he shook his head softly as he started walking toward the door—“then you don’t know your mate at all.”





CHAPTER 8





It had been two days since Evren left. Two days of excruciating worry and fear. Emotions that ate at me even though I reminded myself repeatedly of who he was and what he’d done. But I had no choice in how I felt.

It wasn’t a choice, and I feared what would happen to him if Queen Kaida already knew of his treason. It wouldn’t matter that he was the son of her king. He would become a traitor above all else.

All because he had taken me.

A loud knock sounded at my door and had me looking away from the window. The knock sounded again, hard, loud, impatient, and my gut sank.

My heart lodged in my throat. What if it was Evren?

Could he be back so soon?

I rushed toward the door and jerked it open. I pushed my hair out of my face, and I couldn’t hide my desperation that it was him on the other side of that door.

Even through my fear of who he was, I would have given anything for it to be him.

But I stopped in my tracks when I came face to face with Thalia leaning against my doorframe. Clothing dangled from the crook of her arm, and she watched me in a way that was so calculating yet so unbothered. She was a Starblessed, but that didn’t mean we had any similarities between us. She was a member of this Blood Court, and I was cautious of her as I was everyone else.

“Can I help you?” I straightened out the simple dress that Mina had left for me this morning, and Thalia tracked the movement, taking in my nervous tics for exactly what they were.

“Were you expecting someone else?” Her dark gaze fell upon mine, and I quickly shook my head.

“I was kind of hoping you were lunch.”

“That’ll have to wait.” She straightened to her full height, a few inches taller than me, and tossed the clothing in my direction. I was forced to catch them, and I tugged them close to my chest as I looked up at her like she was crazy. “Get dressed.”

“I am dressed.” I looked down but stopped short at the sound of her scoff.

“Change out of that ridiculous dress. You can’t train for shit in that. I’ll wait for you in the hall.”

Train. “I told Evren that I wasn’t interested in training with you.”

“Well.” She looked back at me, and I could see something in her eyes that both scared me and fueled me at the same time. “I’m not sure if you’re aware or not, but your mate isn’t here.” She simply shrugged her shoulders. “And I’ll be damned if I allow you to just mope around in this room for any time longer. Now get dressed.”

She didn’t wait for my response. She simply stepped back and closed the door behind her to give me privacy.

I stood there for a long moment, staring at the door where she had just been, and I could feel my anger rising. My anger with her, with Evren, with everything.

I moved to my bed and jerked my dress over my head and kicked the useless slippers from my feet. I pulled on the black leather trousers Thalia had brought, and they fit me as if they had been made for me. I pulled my old boots from the small trunk at the end of my bed before sitting down and pulling them on.

Already, I felt better. I felt some sense of power fueling me.

I tucked my dagger into my boot before pulling the black shirt over my head and tucking it into my trousers. It was a bit loose, and the neckline fell at the top of my breasts.

But it was so much more me than the dress I had just torn off.

I stood and moved to the door even though a part of me wanted to refuse her. A much bigger part of me wanted to know about Thalia. I wanted to know what she had been through, who she was to Evren, and if it took training with her to learn these things, then I would do it.

Because deep down I knew I wouldn’t survive this world if I didn’t learn to control my magic. I wouldn’t survive at Evren’s side or if I left.

As soon as I pushed through the door, Thalia looked me over once before she started walking down the hall. She was silent as I followed her, only the sound of our footsteps and my rushed breathing meeting us.