Baking Me Crazy (Donner Bakery, #1)(43)

All this self-pity about Andrew, when he had a perfectly justifiable reason to say no to me, was ridiculous. Here I was, so wrapped up in what hadn't worked out at my request that I'd forgotten about the things I'd turned down. The opportunities I'd been given and had passed up.

"What about you?" Levi asked.

"What?" There was a fire in my belly, stoked higher and higher the more I thought about it.

He started walking, and I followed. "Your first date."

Immediately, I stopped again, gaping up at him. "Give me a break."

Levi turned to me. "What?"

Maybe I didn't have flames shooting out of my eyeballs because he gave no indication he could see the bright anger making my skin melt.

"You know I've never been on a date, you insensitive ass," I snapped. And okay, Levi was apparently my new scapegoat for my internalized anger that I couldn't unload on myself. "And apparently, I never will because men are stupid."

His mouth fell open.

I crossed my arms over my chest and looked away. If there was a list of most irrational creatures on God's green earth, I just took the top spot. But I could no more calm myself down than I could cap an erupting volcano with my bare hands. Oh no, the lava was a-spewing, falling out of my mouth with a hiss and spit and a scratch.

"Jocelyn Marie Abernathy," he said calmly.

I closed my eyes. "Shut up, Levi. I know how I sound right now."

He got closer; I could hear him. His hands landed on my armrests, and I pinched my eyes shut tighter, blocking out even the slightest glimpse of him as the sun beat down on us.

"Look at me, Sonic."

"No."

Then he did the worst possible thing he could've done. Gently, so very, very gently, he ran the edge of his thumb over the arch of my eyebrow where my forehead was probably wrinkled from the effort to keep my eyes shut. If he'd commanded, I could've ignored. If he'd pounded away at my defenses with a hammer or chisel, I would've been able to mute him.

But the gentleness slipped through the hairline crack in my anger like a fog, and I couldn't stop it. He did it again, a slow swipe over my eyebrow and along my hairline, and I felt my face relax with every centimeter of skin that he touched.

When my eyelids lifted, a devastatingly handsome smile split his face.

"What?" I asked suspiciously.

He crouched down so we were eye level, and I hated how that made the backs of my eyes burn. "I'd love to take you out to dinner tomorrow night if you're available."

"What?" I whispered.

My heart flip-flopped as he searched my eyes.

"You heard me."

Cocky ass. My thoughts must have stamped across my face because he tipped his head back and laughed.

"Do you have plans tomorrow night?" he asked.

I pushed my tongue against the inside of my cheek while I studied his face. "No."

"Good. You get dressed up, I'll pick you up at six, and I'll take you out for a nice dinner." His tone brooked no arguments.

I swallowed and found myself nodding. "Okay."

He stood, clapping his hands. "Good."

"Good," I repeated dumbly.

"Wipe that look off your face, Sonic." He started strolling, his hands tucked into his front pockets. "It'll be great."

I was still locked in place as I watched him walk toward his truck.

"What the hell just happened?" I whispered when I knew he couldn't hear me.





Chapter 15





Jocelyn





"What are you going to wear?"

My mom sat on the edge of my bed, twisting my hair into a complicated knot of tiny braids and curls anchored at the base of my skull. Normally, there wasn't much to be done with my hair, but when I told her Levi was taking me out to dinner, my "practice first date" so to speak, she threw herself into it in a way that had me side-eyeing her all damn day.

Since I couldn't move my head, I'd been staring at my closet for the past fifteen minutes while she worked.

"Maybe the blue V-neck. The silk one with the flowy sleeves, and my nice dark jeans."

"Jeans on a first date." She clucked her tongue. "Fix it, Jesus."

Her Southern belle came out swinging when she was confused. I winced when she tugged on a chunk of hair with a misplaced bobby pin.

"Ow."

"Sorry," she mumbled. "Goodness, no wonder you never do your hair. I can hardly see what I'm doing in all these curls."

Ahh, there was the first minor sideswipe of the day. We'd made it all day, which was pretty good for us.

I didn’t answer because I was determined to stay in a good mood until I was out the door with Levi. There was no way I would let her ruin this for me.

"I don't want to wear a dress," I said, directing us back to the clothing situation.

Behind me, she was quiet, because she knew why I didn't want to wear a dress.

"Your legs aren't that skinny. I think it would be fine." Another bobby pin stabbed me, and I hissed in a breath. "Besides, it's just Levi. He doesn't care what your legs look like."

I'd once heard someone say Be the thermostat, not the thermometer. Set the bar for your reaction instead of allowing outside circumstances to tell you what the temp was.