The Space Between Us(83)

“I didn’t tell him you’d seen him. He doesn’t know anything about it. I just asked him if he was with anyone while you were pregnant, if he’d cheated on you.”

I froze. I couldn’t understand why she would have asked him that, especially since all of us knew the answer to the question. I turned quickly and went back into the dressing room, peeling the dress off my body, trying to get it off of me so I could get dressed and leave. I wasn’t comfortable talking about this. I hadn’t anticipated this conversation and I wasn’t prepared to have it here, with her.

“Charlie, I’m sorry,” she said from the other side of the thin drape separating us. “I was so mad at him for what he did to you back then. I’ve been angry at him for years. For abandoning you, for screwing that other girl, for not being there for you through everything, for taking my best friend from me.” She went silent and I stood there, staring at my feet, contemplating her words.

She’d lost a lot that day too. I had to take that into consideration. I put on my clothes and opened the drape. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her to me.

“I’m sorry I’ve been gone for so long,” I whispered into her hair. “I’m sorry I’ve been absent, that I’ve been a terrible friend. I can’t apologize enough.”

“You’re forgiven, as long as you promise not to leave me again.” She pulled away and wiped a tear from her cheek, laughing a little as she exhaled. “There’s something else, Charlie.”

Of course there was.

“What is it?” I asked hesitantly.

“He said he didn’t do it.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, I asked him if he’d slept with anyone and he said no. He was actually a little offended that I even asked him. He seemed really sincere.”

“Reeve, I saw him with her.” Instantly my mind flashed the image of that girl on top of him. I closed my eyes, trying to block it out, but it’s impossible to escape your own mind. “It doesn’t matter what he said, I saw him with her. You can’t argue with that.”

“Why would he lie to me about it?”

“Why not! He probably feels like shit for what he did, knowing what happened. Anyone would lie about that. He doesn’t know I saw him, Reeve. He doesn’t know about any of it. Please, promise me you won’t say anything else to him about it.”

“I won’t. I promise. But I still think you should say something to him. Talk to him about it. It might help you.”

My lungs started to constrict, my chest squeezing me too tight. I couldn’t have that conversation with him. I didn’t want to listen to him justify sleeping with her, telling me why I wasn’t enough. I couldn’t. There was no need. I could imagine everything he would say and that was torture enough for me.

“Can we just buy this dress and then look for a bra?” I pleaded with her silently to let the topic drop. She looked right into my eyes for a few moments, seemingly trying to figure out how much she wanted to push me. Eventually, the corners of her mouth turned up slightly and I could tell she was letting it drop.

“Sure. I know the perfect place.”





Chapter Eleven

Charlie

Even though I felt silly about it, I had to take a few deep breaths before I could walk up to the Carmichaels’ door. How long had it been since I was in this house? It was winter break my sophomore year of college. Like a habit, I reached for the ring hanging around my neck and made sure it was hidden beneath the fabric of my dress. Once I was sure it was secure, I reached up to knock on the door. After a few moments, it opened and I looked at a woman who I loved like a mother for so many years.

“Charlie,” she sighed, as if saying my name brought her some sort of relief. I smiled because I was so happy to see her. She opened her arms and I floated right into them, not even trying to pretend like I didn’t need to feel her comfort. “I’m so glad to see you,” she said after she’d held me for a few moments. I pulled away and smiled at her, genuinely, which was something I was still getting used to.

“It’s really good to see you too, Roberta” I said.

“I am so sorry about your father, Charlie. He was a good man and he loved you so much.”

“Thank you. I appreciate that.”

“Well, come on in. Everyone is in the family room,” she said, leading me towards the room where I spent much of my adolescent years.

I entered the large room and felt a warm sense of familiarity wash over me. The room had newer furniture, but the walls were the same sage green color they were so many years ago. A large flat-screen television hung on one of the walls, an obvious update from the box TV Asher and I used to watch scary movies on late into Saturday nights.

Reeve and her husband were sitting on a couch, her two children at her feet. Asher’s dad talked to Riley about something. It sounded like sports talk, so I understood why Reeve had tuned out and was making faces at Ryder.

Asher leaned against one of the walls, but stood up straight when I entered. Our eyes met and I saw a smile come across his face. Before I could stop myself I returned it. He walked over to me and I noticed his mother moved away, heading into the kitchen.

“Charlie,” he said as he came to stop a foot or two in front of me. “I’m so glad you decided to come.”