The Space Between Us(64)
Then Charles became ill. The illness, the cancer, didn’t go away as we originally hoped. And once we accepted that the cancer would, in the end, take him from this life, we started planning. I’d never planned for anyone’s death before, but Charles was adamant that she wouldn’t be burdened with another parent’s death due to cancer. He made decisions, and even though I didn’t agree with all of them, I honored them. Who was I to argue with a dying man? His choice, to not tell her he was dying, was something I struggled with. I tried, over and over, to convince him that she would want to know. That she would want to spend as much time with him as she could.
“To do what? To watch me die? She did that with her mother and I watched it ruin her. I watched her sit next to her mother as she withered away. I saw what it did to my Charlie and I won’t have her go through that again. She doesn’t need to know.”
Charles was a hard man to persuade. I’d done it a few times in my life, when I was younger, trying to convince him to let me date his daughter, to take her away for a weekend, to sleep in her bed when we were home for breaks from college. But I couldn’t convince him to tell his daughter he was dying. He knew what I knew. That she would be at his bedside, crying and remembering her mother, crying and mourning her father, and breaking on the inside. He didn’t want that for her. I understood.
“I love her, Mr. McBride.” I hadn’t called him that in years, but it felt right at that moment. I felt like I was fifteen again, asking him in his living room if I could please be his daughter’s boyfriend. That was the first time I admitted, out loud, that I loved her. And it remained true since then. “I love her and I always will. I will do everything to make sure she is taken care of. You don’t have to worry and you don’t have to hang on.”
I felt the slightest pressure on my hand as his fingers gripped mine in the faintest way, the way you would imagine a man on death’s door would squeeze your hand.
“I promise. I will take care of her.”
I saw his chest rise, then fall, and then rest. The beeping of the machine slowed, his heart rate dropped, crawled, stilled. Rachel came in to make the machine stop its slowing, dragging beeping, and I watched as the monitors went blank.
I found myself, an hour later, sitting in my car outside of a house I never thought I’d visit again, not until a couple months ago anyway. This was one place I avoided, one person I avoided. I knew, from the beginning, when I stood by Charles as his only ally in death, that this was the next step. I knew it was coming, but it didn’t make it any easier. I walked slowly to the red wooden door of the house. I gathered my courage and finally knocked. I heard footsteps from inside the house quickening, like my heart rate, as they neared. It pulled open and I was face to face with a piece of my past.
Chapter Two
Asher
“Hello, Reeve.” I watched as her face moved from the pleasant look you plaster on your face when you answer your door, to the anger and annoyance that came naturally to Reeve when she encountered me. It had been quite a long time since we’d seen each other, since she told me frankly to “Fuck off” back in college. She was a loyal friend and that was what I was counting on when I showed up on her doorstep.
“What are you doing here, Asher? How did you find out where I live?”
“It’s a matter of public record. And it’s a small town, Reeve.”
“What do you want?” She was just as icy as she was before and with good reason.
“Can I come in?” I asked, hopefully, not wanting to have this conversation on the porch.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Mom, who is that man?” A little girl had poked her head between the door and Reeve’s hip. She had short blonde hair and bright blue eyes. Reeve bent down and put herself at eye level with her daughter.
“He’s just someone trying to sell something, Baby. Go back in the living room and keep an eye on your brother, ok?” The little girl skipped away and I felt the clenching in my chest that I was accustomed to feeling when put face-to-face with children. Reeve stood and turned back to me. “I think you should leave. I have nothing to say to you.” She moved to close the door and I put my foot in the way.
“It’s about Charlie,” I said, knowing that will catch her attention. I saw her face, clearly contemplating what to do next, and as I expected, her loyalty won out. She creaked the door open and stood back, silently and regretfully inviting me in.
“You have five minutes.” I nodded, knowing I’d need more than that, but I’d take the five to begin with. She led me into her kitchen and motioned for me to take a seat at the table. She didn’t offer me something to eat. She didn’t ask me if I wanted some water. She just sat and stared at me expectantly.
“Mr. McBride passed away about an hour ago.” Immediately her frosty demeanor melted away as her hand came to cover her mouth.
“What?” She whispered.
“Yes. He died at Willow Falls Memorial Hospital about an hour ago due to complications of bone cancer.” I watched as a tear fell from her left eye as I coldly told her about the death of a man we all regarded as one of the best on the planet. Inside, I was just as upset about his passing as she was, but I couldn’t show it. Right now, I wasn’t Asher, childhood friend of Reeve. I was Mr. Carmichael, lawyer and representative of Charles McBride.