The Girl Who Cried Wolf(29)

***

‘Hello, Anna.’ She is beside me, and for the first time since I have sensed her presence I turn to look at her, noticing that the dark wolf has gone and only the bright one is lying watching us, a little closer to the shore.

‘Maria, I never thought I’d see you again.’

‘We can see whoever we choose to here.’

‘You chose to see me?’

For the first time, she lifts her head up and looks at me through beautiful aquamarine eyes. She holds my gaze and I take in her beauty. I suppose she was always beautiful but I never saw past her blindness. This loveliness was not limited to her appearance and her now exquisite eyes, it radiated from her, from somewhere deep within her soul. I felt a very human pang of envy and sorrow, as I realized I would never possess this nature of beauty. I look down at my hands as I imagine how I must look beside her.

‘When I heard you were here, Anna, I wanted to see you. I wanted to tell you I’m sorry.’

I am completely taken aback. ‘Why would you need to apologise to me? I behaved terribly; I never forgave myself for the things I said to you, the things I did. I called you ugly; I threw things and shouted at you …’ My voice trails away as I suddenly consider she might be making fun of me somehow, she looks so peaceful and self -assured.

‘Yes. You did hurt me, you really did. I used to cry every night after school. I’d pray to make things better, to make me invisible to you.’

I hang my head in shame as she continues. ‘Actually, my mother came in one night before I went to bed and begged me to tell her what was happening. She knew I could barely eat or sleep and she told me she could hear me crying in my room at night. I confided in her about some of what was happening, but I was too afraid to mention names, I knew that would lead to more trouble.’ She met my eyes again. ‘You hated me so much already. I think my mother went into school and they said they’d look out for any signs of bullying. It was the teachers who realized it was you, Anna. I didn’t tell them.’

I look out to the lake as she continued, ‘After the day you whispered in my ear, I decided if God wouldn’t make me invisible to you, then I would make you invisible to me. I didn’t know where your hate towards me came from and I no longer cared. It was your problem, not mine. In fact, it made me stronger. I decided I no longer needed an assistant; I wanted to be independent. My support group had told me they had a dog for me who would guide me after I’d completed my GCSEs and they took me to see him as a puppy. He lived with us after his training. I fell in love with him at once and he guided me for nearly three years before I died – My very best friend.’

I listen to her voice fill with warmth and love as she talks about her dog. It had surprised me that it had been her decision not to have assistance at school. I was surprised and impressed by her bravery.

‘He wasn’t with me the night I died. I had been out for dinner with friends and thought I could manage alone. I’m glad he wasn’t there, he couldn’t have saved me. The car came from nowhere and crashed onto the kerb when I was about to cross. He would have been killed also.’ A tear falls from her lovely eyes and she smiles sadly. ‘I still feel lost without his senses to guide me. I would have liked him here with me, Anna, but it wasn’t his time. I think he was needed to help someone else.’ She frowns and I ask her what is wrong.

‘We used to connect with each other often, he pined for me and I was able to comfort him. Animals are much more aware than we could ever be. As we grow older we are manipulated so much by the world around us, we are taught what to believe that we forget to use the insight we were born with. I can often reach animals and very young children, but rarely grown-ups.’ She shakes her head and the little frown deepens. ‘I haven’t been able to reach him, he is getting old and I fear he is in jeopardy.’ She touches the water in front of us, which ripples then returns to cool stillness.

‘Nothing.’

We sit quietly for a little while as I don’t know how to comfort her. I wish I could. I break the silence eventually, ‘What did you call your friend?’

‘Marley,’ she says, a smile breaking through her saddened features at the sound of his name.

‘So we really do all come here. Even animals?’ I wonder where my beloved Tulip might be.

Maria is clearly another one to communicate in telepathy for she laughs gently and tells me, ‘Your little friend is here somewhere, Anna. But it is only those that we truly connected with, on an eternal and spiritual level, we are reunited with in the immediate afterlife. You can wait for your loved ones to come, or find them waiting for you, and all the while you learn to live with the intuition you were born with before life begins to take it all away. I’m learning forgiveness, and that’s why I came to find you. To tell you that I’m sorry I didn’t forgive you when I knew you were sorry for what you had done.’

‘How did you know? I was never brave enough to tell you.’

‘When you lose one sense, your others become heightened. The energy when you were near me changed, your voice was different, the way you behaved. I knew you were sorry. I just wanted to punish you.’

‘I was sorry, Maria. I’m still sorry.’

‘Don’t be,’ she says, placing my hand on top of hers. ‘We were young, and if I hadn’t been so stubborn we might have even been friends. Perhaps we’re friends now, after all.’