The Breakdown(24)

house, the same uneasy feeling that I’m being watched

following me as I go. Once inside, I make myself calm

down. There wasn’t anybody watching me, it was only

my guilty conscience at doing something secretive that

made me think that there was. And because I’ve done

what I should have done at the beginning, I begin to

feel better about everything.

After all my hard work yesterday, there’s nothing

left to do in the garden but there’s plenty of housework

waiting. With the radio on for company, I drag the

hoover upstairs and, armed with polish and cleaning

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85


materials, I make a start on the bedrooms. I work


methodically, focusing on the task in hand, steering

my mind away from Jane. And it works – until the news

bulletin comes on at midday.

‘Police are appealing to the person who contacted them earlier today with information relating to the murder of Jane Walters to get back in contact with them. Jane Walters was found murdered in her car on July 17th and…’

I don’t hear any more over the hammering of my

heart. It reverberates in my eardrums, making me deaf. I

sit down on the bed and take deep, shaky breaths. Why

do the police want to speak to me again? I had told them

everything I know. I try to squash down the panic rising

inside me but it just keeps on coming. Even though

nobody knows it was me who made that phone call, the

fact the police have made it public means I no longer

feel anonymous. Instead, I feel horribly exposed. The

police had said something about the person who called

them having information in relation to Jane’s murder. It

makes it sound as if I told them something important,

something vital. If Jane’s killer was listening to the news, he’s bound to feel threatened by my existence. What if he thinks I saw him lurking around Jane’s car that night?

Horribly agitated, I get to my feet and pace the

bedroom, wondering what I should do. As I pass in

front of the window I glance distractedly outside and

find myself freezing. There’s a man, a man I haven’t seen before, walking away from our house. Nothing to worry about, except that he must have come from the woods.





86


b a paris


Nothing to worry about, except that it’s rare to see

anybody walking past our house. Driving, yes, walking,

no. To go for a walk in the woods, no one would go

down Blackwater Lane on foot, not unless they wanted

to get run over. The path that leads to the woods starts

in the field opposite our house and is well signposted.

I watch him until he’s out of sight. He doesn’t hurry, he doesn’t turn around but it does nothing to calm my heart’s furious racing.

*

‘Is Rachel staying with you tonight?’ Matthew asks

when he phones me later from the rig. I haven’t told

him about the man I saw because there’s nothing really

to say. Besides, he might call the police and what would

I tell them?

‘I saw a man walking away from our house.’

‘What did he look like?’

‘Average height, average build. I only saw him from behind.’

‘Where were you?’

‘In the bedroom.’

‘What did he do?’

‘Nothing.’

‘So you didn’t see him do anything suspicious?’

‘No. But I think he might have been looking up at the house.’

‘You think?’

‘Yes.’

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87


‘So you didn’t actual y see him looking at the house.’


‘No.’

‘No,’ I tell Matthew. ‘I decided not to bother her.’

‘That’s a pity.’

‘Why?’

‘It’s just that I don’t like the thought of you being on

your own.’

His worry increases mine. ‘I wish you’d told me that

before.’

‘You’ll be fine. Just make sure that the doors are

locked before you go to bed.’

‘They’re already locked. I wish we had an alarm.’

‘I’ll have a look at the brochure when I get back,’ he

promises.

I hang up and phone Rachel.

‘Are you doing anything tonight?’

‘Sleeping,’ she replies. ‘I’m already in bed.’

‘At nine in the evening?’

‘If you’d had the weekend I had, you’d have been in

bed long ago. So if you’re phoning to ask me to go out,

I’m afraid it’s a no.’

‘I was going to ask you to come round and share a

bottle of wine with me.’

I hear a yawn on the other end of the phone. ‘Why,

are you on your own?’

‘Yes, Matthew’s got an inspection at one of the rigs.