Stranger Than Fanfiction(39)

“How?”

“Like this!”

Sam jumped next to Cash and began dancing even crazier than he was. He moved like a go-go dancer undergoing electroshock therapy. His plan was effective, because all eyes quickly moved from the actor to the psycho dancing beside him.

“It’s working!” Joey said. “I’m going to help, too!”

Joey threw himself into the mix, impressing the onlookers with the zaniest moves he had learned from the Hip-Hop Dance Team. Sam cheered him on and tried mimicking his moves. Mo’s mouth dropped open at the sight and she turned to Topher in shock.

“Oh my God, those are our friends!” She laughed. “I’m gonna dance, too. When in Rome, right?”

Mo sashayed toward her friends and bounced her backside like she was trying to shake off a spider. Sam and Joey laughed hysterically at her and tried to copy it.

As the song played on, it was less and less about creating a distraction from Cash, and more a full-blown competition of who could look like the biggest buffoon. Their eccentricity was contagious and all the people surrounding them began showcasing their own quirky moves, too. Like an airborne epidemic, the ridiculousness spread through the crowd until the entire warehouse was dancing wildly, and Cash was Patient Zero.

“Come on, Topher!” Sam said as he danced toward him. “Let your freak flag fly!”

“I’m good,” he said. “I’m not much of a mover or a shaker. I’m just gonna go hang out by the bar until there’s a slower song—”

“Topher,” Sam said, and forcefully pulled him closer. “Shut up and dance with me.”

All it took was a tug on his arm and a twinkle in Sam’s eye, and Topher lost all sense of himself. He moved his body like an orangutan on speed, like an intoxicated father of the bride, like an inflatable at a car sale. He made Sam laugh so hard tears filled his eyes. Sam was so beside himself he had to stop and catch his breath. Topher had never seen him so happy before—he would have danced all night if it meant more time with Sam’s smile and laugh.

That’s when it dawned on him. Oh no…, Topher thought, unable to deny it anymore. I’ve got a crush on Samantha Gibson.

Sam caught his breath and continued dancing, twirling in a circle around Topher like an orbiting planet. Sam was so free, so loose, and so carefree, he was practically another person altogether, certainly not the girl Topher had grown up with.

Oh fuuuuuck…, Topher thought. This is more than a crush. I might be in love with Samantha Gibson!

Mo and Joey popped up on either side of them and started freak dancing like small dogs marking their territory. Apparently Sam wasn’t the only one in rare form—it was almost impossible not to let go.

There were no parents holding them back, no younger siblings needing to be cared for, no one telling them they were going to burn in hell, and no one telling them they had an illness. There were no limits, no responsibilities, no religion, and no misunderstandings. In that moment, there was just the music vibrating through their bodies. The worst part was knowing the music and the moment would eventually end.

After four or five songs’ worth of intense dancing, Cash began to slow down. He looked at the dancing fools around him with pride, but then froze like he was about to be sick.

“Are you okay, bud?” Topher asked. “Need some water?”

As if it were happening in slow motion, Topher watched the light fade from his eyes, the smile fade from his lips, and the color drain from his face. The actor fell backward and collapsed on the floor.

“CAAAASH!” Topher screamed.





Chapter Eleven


STREAMSIDE STREAMING


Monday morning at eight o’clock, Topher gingerly approached cabin 8 of the Paul Bunyan Hotel and knocked on the door with his good hand. His whole right side was sore from carrying Cash out of the warehouse the night before. Luckily, the actor had regained consciousness once he had some fresh air, and had blamed the episode on low blood sugar. The others were so relieved he hadn’t dropped dead that they didn’t question him, but privately they had their doubts.

“Hey, Cash? Are you awake?” Topher said. “We’re ready to go when you are.”

When they arrived at the Paul Bunyan Hotel after the concert, Topher and his friends decided to give Cash one of the two cabins they’d reserved all to himself. After hearing the demonic noises he made in his sleep, no one wanted to bunk with the actor.

“Cash, can you hear me?” Topher said, and knocked again. “Are you even in there?”

The door opened a crack and Topher saw that Cash was still in a hotel bathrobe. The actor shielded his eyes from the sunlight like a vampire and moaned. He cradled a small trash can like it was a newborn baby.

“Good morning, Cash!” Topher said cheerfully.

Just the sound of his voice was agonizing for the actor.

“Sorry, I slept in.” He groaned. “Is it time to leave already?”

“Yeah, but there’s no rush,” Topher said. “We’re spending the whole day at the Mark Twain National Forest, so we can leave whenever you’re ready.”

“About that,” Cash said. “Look, I woke up with a terrible headache. I feel like someone’s hammering a pickax into my skull. I’m not sure hiking through the wilderness is a good idea.”