Saving Dancer (Savage Brothers MC #2)(61)

“Sure baby climb on board,” I tell her, patting my lap. She slides on and my dick…lays there. Her perfume feels as if it’s going to choke me. Carrie doesn’t wear perfume. Her scent is a mixture of the lotion and shampoo she uses. It’s clean, sweet and…too good for me.

She starts licking on my neck like some damn dog in heat. Is this what I have to look forward to in life? I down another shot to dull the feel of her.

“Keep your f*cking hands away from my head, Tash,” I bark when she starts to pull my face to her. I can’t handle that shit. I couldn’t handle certain things with Carrie, but the feel of this bitch’s hands pulling my head down… f*ck I want to vomit. Instead, I down another drink. My hands are shaking. Images flash in my mind. I was unconscious during most of my attack but every now and then I remember the smell, the voices, and the laughter as another… SHIT! Why the f*ck are the memories getting more intense and coming so often?

I look back at Nicole, her face is blurry as hell. I see her laughing, her hand on her stomach. My mind pictures Carrie in that same pose, laughing and being happy—with me. The thought of her makes my dick jerk, which considering the bottle I’ve ingested is a miracle. Tash is undoing my pants. What does it matter? Not a damn thing, unless you count the fact that my dick just shriveled up at the thought.

I’m about to push the bitch off of me when I feel her hand graze the head of my cock. I can feel bile rise in my throat. I haven’t been able to let anyone touch my dick, but me. I grieved it. I wanted Carrie to suck me off. I longed for it. Yet, just the thought of giving someone control…

I take another drink. The bottle is empty now. I’m going to grab another and get the f*ck away from Tash and pray the liquor does its job.

“You disgust me,” Nicole says from beside me.

I jerk around to face her, swaying but I manage to stay on the stool. She’s looking at me with so much revulsion it pisses me the hell off. She wasn’t lying. Fuck I was pretty sick of myself. Still I don’t appreciate this bitch calling me out in front of everyone.

“Who the hell do you think you are?” I ask, knowing if Dragon walks in, he will hand me my ass on a platter.

“I am apparently the only one here with enough nerve to tell you what a f*ck up, you’re being. I know you got shit going on in your head Dancer, but don’t you think it’s time to grow the hell up? You’re home now quit hurting people who give a damn about you and be a f*cking man!”

“Woman, I’m not going to tell your ass again. Get the hell out of my business.”

“Carrie is my business.”

“I don’t owe that cunt a damn thing. She wanted my cock and she got it. End-of-story!”

Even saying this shit hurts me, but I can’t give in. Carrie left me. She gave up on me. She finally discovered what I already know. She’s too good for me.

“You’re such a pig. She loves you. Dragon does too.”

Her words cut open the part inside of me that isn’t dead. Dragon and Carrie are probably the only two people in my life who have ever cared about me besides Jazz. That thought hurts so deep, I lash out.

“The bitch asked for my cock, she got it. Who I give my dick to, is none of your f*cking concern. That is unless you want to take a ride on the train too?”

“Don’t make me gag! You stay drunk off your ass! You take a good woman’s virginity, who just so happens to love you and you just kick her to the curb for a woman whose * has been used so many times it’s wider than the grand f*cking canyon? What is wrong with you?”

“What’d you say about me bitch?” Tash joins in.

“Do you really want me to show you how the f*ck I feel about you again Tash? If you do, bring it on. I’ll do your ugly ass a favor and break your nose the other way this time and get rid of that nasty crooked shit you got going on,” Nicole responds.

“Are you going to let her talk to me like that?” Tash asks.

I hold my head down and rub the bridge of my nose. Fuck a duck, I can’t handle this.

“Bitch please, your legs get spread more than peanut butter,” Nicole snaps at Tash and I want to laugh.

“Well I never!” Tash whines back and her voice is so grating I cringe.

“There are three words no one ever thought they’d hear out of your mouth. I guess God still gives out miracles.”

“I doubt you know anything about God,” Tash snaps in response to Nicole.

“I know you’ve been on your knees more than Billy Graham, does that count?”

“Bitch…”

“WILL YOU TWO SHUT THE HELL UP? I’m f*cking tired of it. Nicole, get your cunt ass back to Dragon and get the f*ck away from me!”

The room goes completely quiet. It had died down before, but this quiet is more.

“I can’t believe you, but yeah I’ll leave you alone. Carrie and the baby are better off without your sorry ass anyway.”

I get out of my chair pushing Tash off of me. I need out of here. It feels like I’m f*cking choking on the air.

“Only time I need to hear or see your damn mouth is if you want to suck my cock. I hear you’re good at that shit…”

I growl dismissing Nicole, intent on getting the f*ck out of here.

“What the f*ck did you just say to my woman, Dance?” Dragon yells out from across the room.