Saved by Love (Willow Valley Book 3)(41)

Denise was right. Abby knew she was. But was she brave enough to make the change she needed to make? Was she truly prepared to cast her fears aside once and for all? She thought she had, but she’d only been fooling herself before. Her biggest fear had been with her all along.

Being alone. Not having anyone. Losing the people who mattered most to her.

Well, she’d been there. She’d been there after Derek died. She’d been there after her mother died. She was there now! Her heart was breaking and she was alone. This time by her own doing.

“Denise, I’ve been a fool,” she whispered.

“No, dear, you’ve just been blinded by your past. But I think it’s time to let it go.”





CHAPTER FOURTEEN





Ethan spent the next week and a half in a state of depression greater than he’d ever known in his life. His friends at work had even stopped asking him what was wrong once they knew he wasn’t going to stop moping around. He’d been like this once before, though not so bad, but this time he didn’t know how he was going to drag himself up out of it.

He’d tried his hardest not to run into Abby outside the apartment building. He just wasn’t ready to see her yet. The pain of losing her was still too fresh, too raw. Part of him wanted to beg her to reconsider, but he knew it was useless. If she was going to change her mind she would have to come to the realization on her own.

By Sunday night, he had run out of food in the apartment and needed something for dinner. He figured he’d just drive through somewhere and pick something up, though the idea of fast food didn’t sit well. Not caring enough to do anything about it, he grabbed his keys and pulled open the door, only to stop in his tracks.

Abby was standing at his door, one hand poised to knock on the door he’d just opened, the other struggling to keep a stack of containers from tumbling over. He rushed to take the containers from her, then stepped back into his apartment.

“Abby.” He was shocked to see her standing there, a nervous look on her face.

“I brought you some food from dinner at my parents’ house.” She nodded toward the containers he was now holding, which he then noticed were piping hot and smelled delicious.

He also noticed that she’d called the Kincades her parents. That was new.

“Can I come in for a minute? I won’t stay long. I can see that you were just heading out. I don’t want to mess up your plans.” Her face turned a bright shade of red, and he wondered where she thought he was going. Surely she didn’t think out with another woman.

He backed up, making room for her to come in. “Sorry. I just didn’t expect to see you when I opened the door.” Or at all. “I was actually just headed to scrounge up something to eat, so you’ve saved me the trouble. Thanks. It was nice of you to think of me.” He tried to muster up one of his charming smiles, but it fell flat and he sighed instead, turning to take the food to the kitchen.

Suddenly he couldn’t wait for her to leave. Why was she there? Having her this close only made him want to crush her to him and kiss her until she came to her senses and realized they were meant to be together.

“Why are you here, Abby?” he demanded, his voice becoming impatient. He didn’t mean to take out his frustration on her, but what else was he supposed to do? The woman he loved but couldn’t have was in his apartment acting as if they’d never been anything but friends who brought each other dinner.

She jumped, then wrapped her arms around her stomach. “Um, I just wanted to see how you were doing?”

“How I’m doing?” He whirled on her, throwing his hands up in the air. “How do you think I’m doing?” He knew he looked rough. He hadn’t bothered shaving since his last shift a few days ago. “I tell a woman I love her—the only time I’ve ever said that, by the way—and she tells me she doesn’t want me.”

“I never said I didn’t want you, Ethan. That’s the furthest thing from the truth.” She looked stricken.

“Then why aren’t we together now? And don’t give me more crap about you not being able to deal with my life. I’ve had time to think about it, and that’s just an excuse, Abby. An excuse.”

She flinched. “I know,” she whispered. “I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you.”

“Too late,” he snapped. He didn’t know why he was being such an ass. He didn’t mean to, but he was tired and brokenhearted and it was coming out all wrong. He raked a hand through his hair and tried to calm down. “Look, I’m sorry. I’m having a bad day and I shouldn’t take it out on you.”

“I’ll just go now. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have come.” She blinked back tears and turned to go.

“No, Abby, wait,” he called after her. But it was useless. She’d already made it up the stairs by the time he walked outside to catch her. He slammed the door, berating himself for being such an idiot. She’d brought him dinner. She was thinking about him. And he’d pushed her away. He had to pull his act together. He’d been wallowing in self-pity for way too long and he was sick of it. Yeah, he’d never been in love and had his heart broken before, but he was Ethan Barnes. He didn’t just sit by and let life happen to him. He was a man of action.

Abby had made an effort to come see him. Who knew what that could mean? Maybe they still had a chance. If so, he wasn’t going to sit by and watch it slip away.