Raging Heart On (Lucas Brothers #2)(74)

“Thanks, Mom.”

“I’m fine,” Kayla says weakly, sitting up in the bed. Relief sweeps over me and I’ve never felt more grateful in my life than when I finally see Kayla’s beautiful eyes open. “Did you really name your cow Hamburger?”

“Not originally, but the boys wouldn’t shut up, so I gave in. Hammy likes the name, so who am I to argue?”

“That’s just wrong, Ida Sue.”

“I’ll tell you what’s wrong. You being sick. I’m going to get Doc Baker to come out here and check you out.”

“I’m fine. It was just stress,” Kayla says, and her eyes lock with mine.

“You guys go check on Jansen,” I order, my voice gruff. They mumble their goodbyes to Kayla and I try to sort through everything, wondering how my life went to shit in the space of an hour.

“I’ll get Doc Baker to come out. It’s best to play it safe and not be sorry later,” Mom says at the door. “White Hall?” I look up at her, feeling a f*ck of a lot older than I really am. “Don’t be an * and f*ck it all up.”

“Mom…”

“I’m just saying! Of all of my boys, you have the tendency to react half-cocked and regret it later.”

“Ida Sue, we’ll handle it,” Kayla says quietly. I turn to her and see the fear in her eyes. I also see the questions, questions we both have to answer, questions that are surrounding us and seem to be choking the very air we breathe.

It takes a few minutes before Mom and Black finally say their goodbyes. I bite my tongue to keep from beating Black down for hugging Kayla. It appears that even mad, I am still a possessive motherf*cker. When the door closes, we sit there in the empty room for a few minutes staring at each other.

“So…” Kayla says, a little color starting to come back to her face.

“Why, Kayla?” I ask without meaning to. I sound desperate and f*ck, I am. Knowing Kayla has been lying to me feels like someone has cut out my heart.

“Why?”

“Why the f*ck are you taking birth control pills?” I growl, unable to stop myself, feeling her betrayal twist in the pit of my stomach like a poison.





CHAPTER 57


KAYLA




White’s accusation hangs between us, and nerves threaten to consume me. I understand why he is upset, and I need to talk to him about it. I do. I need to explain. I don’t know how to make him comprehend why I made the choices I did, though. I’m not even sure I understand them myself. But his demand upsets me more. I mean, I get he’s pissed, but in light of Rachel showing up, I think we have more than just my birth control to discuss.

“I need to go out and check on Rachel,” I tell him.

“The hell you do! We need to clear this up between us. You’ve been lying to me.”

I sit up on the bed, doing my best to shake the dizziness off; the last thing I need to do is pass out again. “I didn’t lie! I just… wasn’t completely forthcoming about things.”

“Did you seriously just say that to me right now?”

“You didn’t ask me if I was still taking birth control! I was unsure about our relationship, and I was protecting myself! I think I had that right!” I growl, then immediately regret my words. They aren’t truthful, not really. “I think it’s clear that you’ve been keeping your own secrets here! And yours are definitely bigger!” I yell, getting up. I stumble a little and feel White grab my arm to steady me, so I jerk it away.

“Sit down before you fall down!”

“I’m fine! I’m upset! As any woman would be when they find out the man they love knocked up her sister!”

“I did not knock her up!”

“It sure looks like you did!”

“I don’t know who put that kid in her belly, but it wasn’t me. The only woman I’ve been trying to do that with was busy making sure it wouldn’t happen! What is it, Kayla? Are you too good to have a kid with me? It’s okay to sleep with the football jock, but I’m not good enough to give you a kid? You rather save that for a f*ckwad like Tommy Haynes?”

“I can’t believe you just said that to me!”

“Why? What the hell else am I supposed to think?”

“That I know you! That I was scared and confused! I stopped taking the damn pills! I stupidly thought I could trust you and in what we were building! Call me stupid!”

“I will! You are acting stupid right now! I’ve never lied to you. I’ve never given you a reason to doubt me or think I’m lying to you.”

“I’m acting stupid?” I ask in disbelief.

“That’s what I said,” White growls, and that’s it. I stomp out of the room. I don’t even want to look at him. I’m walking through the house, not sure where I’m going. I just know I want to be gone. I can’t deal with any of this right now. “Where the hell are you going? We have to have this out!”

“I think we’ve said enough for now.”

“No way! Get your ass back here, Kayla. You need to explain why you didn’t—”

“Didn’t what, White? Let you knock me up?” I yell when I make it out onto the porch, which might not be the place to discuss this, since Ida Sue, Jansen, Black, Luka, Petal, their little boy, Rachel, and some man I don’t know are out here. Green’s truck is in the driveway and he’s standing at the steps watching it all. I know because our eyes lock and I can feel the tears start. I look back at White and then I see Rachel standing behind him.