Raging Heart On (Lucas Brothers #2)(72)

“White,” Black starts, but I ignore him; my concentration is on Kayla.

“I told you I love you, Kayla. Only you, Buttercup. You told me you believed me.”

“I did. I do… mostly, but there’s all those women you’re with. They’re all so beautiful and then there’s me. Even Rachel…”

“I told you nothing happened with Rachel—”

“White,” Black says again.

“Uh, son…” Ida Sue joins him. I’m taking a step toward Kayla. I want to talk to her about this alone. We need to straighten this shit out. Before I can, however, she goes as pale as a ghost.

“Kayla?” I ask, afraid now something is wrong with her health. I watch as her body trembles. “What’s wrong with you?”

“I think that might be me,” I hear, and I turn around.

I turn and stare straight at Kayla’s sister, Rachel. A very pregnant Rachel.





CHAPTER 55


KAYLA




“Where the hell did she come from?” I hear White hiss.

“I tried to tell you, man,” Black responds. I can’t pay attention because I’m just looking at Rachel. I already felt faint before, but now I’m close to passing out. I don’t want my sister here. I don’t want my sister watching yet another man tell me what trash I am and toss me aside like an old newspaper. I don’t want to see that look in her eye, the one where she tries to look like she hurts for me, but instead I see gloating satisfaction shining back at me.

“What are you doing here, Rachel?” White growls.

“You invited me, remember? I’m just taking you up on your offer.”

“I don’t remember inviting you to my mother’s.”

“No, but you did invite me to come spend time with you and my sister. When I saw on Kayla’s Facebook status that you two were down here, I just decided to come. I did warn you I needed to talk to you.”

“Surely that could have waited until we were back home,” I tell her, and I want to wince at the weak, hoarse voice I’m using. It’s only then I remember that I’ve been crying. Check that; I still am crying, and isn’t that just wonderful? I love that Rachel can see my humiliation. Just love it.

“No. It couldn’t wait, Kayla. The world doesn’t exactly revolve around you, you know. That’s one of the things father could never stand about you. You had to always be the center of attention. I see you haven’t outgrown that.”

My face heats red. I have to fight to keep from withdrawing like I always used to—like I was conditioned to do. Before I can speak up, White is standing in front of me, and Black succeeds in blocking me from the side. I can barely catch a glimpse of my sister through them.

“Keep your voice civil around Kayla or you can leave. She’s at home here. You are not.”

“It didn’t sound like she was at home here. It sounded to me like you were just about to send her on her way.”

“You’d be mistaken. It was a small difference of opinion. Couples have those. It means nothing,” White says, and my heart turns over. Small difference of opinion? Is he serious? Things are changing so much around me, I can’t gather my bearings. What I do know is, I don’t want to be that quiet church mouse anymore. When I was growing up, I tried to be quiet and not draw attention to myself. Doing that meant punishment and berating. It rarely worked, but I tried. I don’t want to be that frightened child anymore. Ida Sue rescued me in more ways than one, and I’m not about to forget the strength being part of the Lucas clan gave me. For that reason alone, I push through the two men, who I think are trying to protect me.

“If you say so, regardless, there are still things I’d like to talk with you about.”

“Talk away.”

“Rachel, maybe we should go inside and sit down. I didn’t know you were pregnant. Why didn’t you tell me?” I try to ignore the way it feels to know my sister is pregnant. If I hadn’t been stupid, would I have already been carrying White’s baby? Will I get the chance to do that now? Can I make him understand? I have so many questions, I’m scared, I’m nervous, and now I’m jealous of my sister. I thought I had made progress over the years, but suddenly I’m wondering if I have at all.

“I wanted to tell you. Actually, I would like to sit down. I’m not feeling that great today. I’ve had some complications with the pregnancy.”

“Absolutely,” I tell her, going to her and using the back of my hand to wipe the tears and try to not look like a complete idiot. “Why didn’t you tell me? Is the dad in the picture? If I can help you at all, I’m here,” I tell her, and internally I’m kicking myself. Rachel is not good to me. She’s definitely not good for me, and honestly, she’s not that great of a person, and yet here I am falling into old habits, being the sister who begs for her attention and tries to get approval. Why? Why do I even want a sense of belonging with her? What makes me crave approval from a family that never wanted me and never will? I hear White grunt in the background and I know him enough to know that he’s not happy with me right now either. Whether that’s about Rachel or the birth control pills, I’m not sure. If I had to guess right now, I’d say both.

“That’s why I’m here,” Rachel says, and I feel guilty for thinking she’s leaning on me a little too heavily since of the two of us, I’m probably dizzier than she is. I wish my heart would quit beating so hard. I feel so nervous. I just need to get Rachel settled and then I can talk with White. I’ve got to get this straightened out.