Perfect for You(38)

By lunch, I’m itching to see Ash. We really need to talk and I want to get this whole Derrick thing out of the way so we can enjoy the rest of the day together. I’m not letting Derrick ruin this for me. He’s ruined enough already. I grab my lunch and books for my next class as quickly as possible and head to Ash’s locker to surprise him. Hopefully he’s over the Derrick incident. I want to put it behind us.

Ash isn’t at his locker. Thinking he went to mine, I head back, but I take a different route, around the English wing since I didn’t run into Ash on the way here. He could’ve gone this way instead. The hallways are set up in a bunch of square patterns. I round the corner and see Liz leaning against a set of lockers, and my heart nearly stops when I notice Ash is with her. She’s smiling, and if she sticks her chest out any more, her boobs are going to tumble right out of her microscopic top. I want to rush over there and rip her hair out, but Ash is talking to her. They’re in the middle of a conversation. On our anniversary. I thought after she threw herself at him at the last football party and then attacked me at the game, Ash wouldn’t so much as look in her direction. What is he doing?

She playfully pushes against his chest, making my insides lurch. I can’t move. For the second time today, I’m frozen. Ash is letting Liz touch him. It might not be in front of my locker, but seeing him standing there…with her…it’s too much. Too familiar. She touches his shoulder and gives him a flirtatious wave before walking away. My stomach sinks. I could melt into the ground right now, but I force my feet to move. I need answers. I won’t let this happen to me again.

“Ash.” My voice is small, and I clench my hands to stop them from shaking. Only it doesn’t work. I’m losing it.

He jumps slightly and shoves his hands in his jeans pockets. “Meg, I was just coming to meet you.”

“Yeah, well I guess you took too much time talking to Liz.”

Ash looks down the hall where Liz is disappearing around the corner. “It’s not what you think.”

The people around us give us long glances before walking away. I don’t need an audience for this humiliation. Not again.

“What is it then? I thought you weren’t talking to her anymore. That’s what you told me. I stopped hanging out with Noah because you asked me to, but you couldn’t stay away from her. Not even after she tried to humiliate me at the game.” Did I make a huge mistake? Push the wrong guy away?

“I’m not hanging out with Liz or even really talking to her. She put a note in my locker, and I came here to tell her to knock it off.”

He didn’t seem angry with her. He didn’t even stop her from touching him. I motion to his empty hands. “Where’s the note?” If he’s telling the truth, he’d have the evidence to prove it. Instead he looks down at his sneakers.

“I threw it away. I didn’t want to hold on to it.”

“What did it say?” My throat is burning, and I know the tears are only moments away.

“Meg.” He steps toward me, reaching for my hands. I let him take them at first, but the pain inside me is growing too strong. He’s going to break my heart. Just like Derrick did. I think about what Noah said. She thinks she has a shot with him. There has to be a reason why Liz thinks she has a chance with Ash. Why is this happening to me again? I did the right thing. I sent Noah away. For Ash. And now Ash is running around with Liz behind my back? How is this fair?

Ash tries to pull me to him, to kiss me, but I can’t be sure where his lips have been. The thought rips my heart in two. I yank my hands away and cross my arms. “Don’t.”

“Please, let me explain.” He runs his fingers through his hair, clearly frustrated.

“Tell me what the note said.” I’m not backing down. I have to know. No matter how much it’s going to hurt—because I’m sure Ash’s hesitation means it’s worse than bad. “I deserve to know, Ash.”

He lowers his head. “It’s stupid. Just Liz playing games.”

“Damn it, Ash. Tell me!” The tears are blurring my vision, but I refuse to let them spill. Not yet. Not before I find out the truth, hear it from Ash.

He shakes his head and meets my eyes. “It said to meet her in the girls’ bathroom by the art room after practice.”

The bathroom by the art room? Is that their secret meeting place? Liz’s words in the hallway before photography replay in my mind. He said she’s too much work to date. He’s sick of it. So, he’s hanging out with me tonight. My God! She was talking about Ash. “Did you complain to her about me? Did you say dating me is too hard?”

Ash stiffens and inhales sharply. “This thing with Noah…you have no idea how hard it’s been for me. I—”

“Decided to let Liz comfort you?” He doesn’t answer so I know I’m right. How long has this been going on? I can’t hold back my tears anymore. I can’t stop this ache in my chest, in my stomach, in my heart. He’s cheating on me. And I caught him. Ash, of all people, is cheating on me. Lying to me.

“We’re done,” I manage to say before pushing him in the chest and rushing down the hall. I run down the stairs, knocking over a kid from my trig class, but I don’t even apologize. I can’t talk. I can’t form words. I can’t breathe. I head out the back doors and straight for the woods behind the school. Screw my afternoon classes. Screw practice. Screw Ash. I run. The ache in my legs distracts me from the ache in my heart. Gives me something else to focus on.