Lustly(16)

Speaking of the *, Eli’s goons were able to get enough evidence on my husband and Kate to nail him to the floor. It was up to me when I let the cat out of the bag and left the bastard.

Things were good at first working at both places and still managing my home life. The doctor’s office called and let me know that I had a yeast infection. It was gone after two days on antibiotics, but I milked it for the next two weeks. I knew in time he’d expect me to perform, and the idea of being with him made me cringe. One day while at the attorney’s office, I told Eli about my predicament. After he laughed at me for a few minutes, he did something that caught me off guard.

He asked me to have dinner with him.

As flattered as I was, I knew that Eli was my only friend, who was also helping me with my impending divorce. I couldn’t complicate things by leading him on, no matter how sexy he was. The last thing on my mind was starting up a new relationship, when I still wasn’t free and clear from my current one. Okay, for the record it wasn’t the last thing on my mind. Secretly I replayed him asking me out over and over again. It was definitely something that brought an immediate smile to my face.

After I turned Eli down I felt annoyed with myself. Here was this handsome man that obviously enjoyed my company. As much as I appreciated it, I wasn’t willing to let myself go there with another man.

My kids kept me grounded, while driving me bat-shit crazy at the same time. I ran them everywhere they needed to be, and pretended to be happy-go-lucky whenever I was near them. My focus was always on what they needed, which was more than they were used to. I’d always put my husband’s needs over everyone else’s, and now things were different. I couldn’t care less if he had clean matched up socks, and the last thing on my mind was finding alone time to cuddle up next to that *. Every part of him made me sick.

I no longer looked into his eyes and saw myself. His dark thinned hair that never bothered me before made me laugh now every time I looked at it.

It wasn’t until he got sick that things started to drastically worry me. He’d stayed home from work, which he’d never done before. In turn, I had to call out of my job so that he didn’t find out. While he grabbed a hot shower, I called Eli and let him know that I may not be able to stop by for my normal hours in the afternoon. Then I put myself into the caring wife mode that I’d lived with for so many years. I got him something to eat and went to the pharmacy to get him medication to alleviate his symptoms. When I came home I found him crying.

Out of instinct I rushed to his side. “Charlie, what’s wrong?”

He looked at me with sad eyes. “Do you still love me, Lil?”

“Of course,” I replied, not really even thinking about it. In regards to my feelings, I hated him for so many reasons, but he would always be the father to my children, and for that reason I’d love him.

“I feel like we’re falling apart. You haven’t touched me in months.”

I sat down on the bed next to him and looked down at my hands. Why did he want to be with me when he had Kate next door to fulfill his every desire? Obviously I wasn’t enough for him. “I’ve been going through something. My doctor says that it’s early signs of change of life.” She’d really told me that my problems were derived from stress.

“I miss you, Lil. I miss making you smile, and the way you feel when I’m holding you.”

Was he lying? I felt so conflicted.

“I’m sorry.”

“Come here. It’s just us. The kids won’t be home for a few more hours.” He shook his head and reached out his hand.

“What about your cold?”

“Nothing can keep me from wanting my wife.”

Admittedly my heart skipped a beat hearing him say that to me. I’d felt so rejected and he was emotionally pleading with me to spend time with him. As much as he’d broken me, I needed to feel like I wasn’t worthless. I wanted to feel what was once only mine.

My body fell against his chest as he wrapped his arms around me, kissing the top of my head. I looked up to find his eyes fixed on mine, his lips coming down to kiss me. Tears filled my eyes as my emotions ran wild.

I needed this.

I needed to feel like I was the only woman he was in love with, even if I knew it was only a temporary fixation.

Charlie removed my clothes with little effort, exposing my naked body before him. He nestled his mouth over one of my nipples, sucking hard on it and then licking at the tip. I let my head fall back as my desire to be with him again began taking over the decision making. I reached down and tugged on his boxers, wanting so much for him to be inside of me. We wrestled around until I was lying on my back. Charlie pushed down his boxers and climbed on top of me. He entered me without a single kiss or affectionate embrace. I watched the veins in his forehead protrude as he pumped into me. He lurched his head forward, finally touching my lips for the first time. While his pace began, so did the rationalization of what was happening.

I’d denied myself pleasure for so long that I was enabling the man that had betrayed me to have his way. I pitied myself and immediately became an emotional wreck. Charlie never noticed my breakdown as he pounded inside of me. Nearly two minutes later, and I’m not even kidding about that, he collapsed and fell beside me on the bed. I rolled over and cried silently as he ran his fingers through my hair. “I needed that.”