Love's Suicide (Love's Suicide #1)(78)

I put my hand over my mouth so he couldn’t see it wide open in shock. “I don’t know what to say.”

He looked down at it again and touched his skin. Then he looked over at B. “Now, looking at what we made that night melts my heart even more.”

I looked down at the carpet, unable to hide my emotions from him. With B asleep we were all alone, back in a hotel room, like the night we’d been together the last time. “Brooks-” His name lingered on my lips.

“Come here.”

I shook my head, knowing that being with him would be considered adultery. It was like a force field was sitting between Brooks and me and I wasn’t allowed to pass through it. “I can’t.”

He reached over and placed his hand on my leg. “Close your eyes.”

I did what he said and felt him taking my hand. He pulled me slowly from one bed toward the other. When I opened my eyes I was standing right in front of him. His breath was on mine and feeling it gave me chills. “I can’t do this, Brooks. It’s wrong.”

He took a hold of the t-shirt and pulled me closer. Our lips were touching and I was falling hard for the man that I’d dreamed of being with him for as long as I could remember. “I’m not stealing from him, when you were never his to begin with. You didn’t belong to Branch and you sure as hell don’t belong to Bobby. A piece of paper isn’t love. Close your eyes and tell me you don’t feel it again? Tell me that you haven’t thought of that night we spent together every single day since it happened? If you don’t want this, then back up and go to sleep.”

His lips brushed over mine as he spoke and I was losing control over myself and my emotions. He wasn’t playing fair and resisting him, after losing him and then thinking he was dead, was making my decision impossible to fight. “I’m scared.”

Brooks stood up and looked down at me. His army shirt was being lifted up and my arms wouldn’t let me fight him. They raised as if he was controlling my body. I felt it pull over my head and the cold air hitting my nipples. I was standing there in only a pair of underwear as he was backing us up onto the bed. Brooks didn’t look down at my body, nor did he try to kiss me. We got under the covers and he pulled me against his warm chest. My desire for him was making it hard to focus on what was really happening.

Brooks wasn’t trying to sleep with me. He didn’t want to push me into something I wasn’t ready for. All he desired was to be close to me. He wanted to hold me and never let me go.

Just like he’d done our whole lives, Brooks was protecting me. His love had gotten me through the most horrible of times and it was with that love that I was able to never give up hope that we’d be together again someday. I closed my eyes and rested my head on his bare chest. He stroked my hair and kissed the top of my head. “Don’t be scared, Kat. If you fall, I’ll catch you. I always have and I always will. Except, this time I’m never going to let you go.”





Chapter 37


While I lay there in his arms, I played with his dog tags, memorizing the numbers and the way the indentation of the stamping felt against my fingertips. Whether it was wrong or right, I knew I was where I was supposed to be.

Brooks kept running his hands over my back as we lay there quietly. I wanted to go to sleep, but couldn’t imagine it happening while being so close to him after all of the time that had passed. The obvious heat growing between my legs was a perfect indication of how starved I was for his affections. Even my body wanted to make up for all of the time that we’d been apart. In our room, hidden away from the rest of the world, nothing else existed. The three of us were all that mattered to me.

When I looked up into Brooks’ eyes, I knew he was having the same intense feelings. He licked his lips and looked down at mine. It was so sinful yet seemingly appropriate, all at the same time. This was Brooks, not some strange man that I was running around with. He was the father of my child and the owner of my heart. “I love you.” It came out as a whisper, but only because I didn’t want to wake up B.

Brooks sat up a little, causing me to fall off of him. He cupped my face into his hands and looked deeply into my eyes. “You were worth the wait.” Our lips connected and immediately there was a fire that ignited throughout my body. The power of one kiss not only overwhelmed me, but it made me feel as if we were levitating up above the bed.

His hand began to caress my skin, in places that were beyond the friend zone. I didn’t care. My rationalizing of what was right and wrong had been put to the side, because I was kissing this beautiful half-naked man, with enough years of pent up emotions that nothing was going to interfere. We’d had time and an ocean against us. Family and friends had alienated our bond, albeit being in this very moment made all of their attempts seem insignificant.

Brooks grabbed my backside and lifted me to be straddling him. I sat up, no longer ashamed for him to see my naked breasts. Not that he even paid them any attention. His eyes were fixed on mine as our lips continued making contact, hosting our blending tongues. Each kiss was deeper and hotter.

I knew I wanted this man, and every inch of his smoking hot physique. Knowing that his heart was all mine aided my desire.

We stopping kissing, to catch our breaths and decide how far we were willing to take things. I’d told him earlier that it couldn’t happen, but knew there was no way I could stop myself. “Uh-oh.”