Instead of You(56)

He pulled away, smiled at me, and then tucked a piece of my hair behind my ear before turning back to his friends.

“Well, I think I speak for everyone when I say that was ridiculously cute and also it’s about freaking time, Wallace.” This came from Alice, who was all smiles. Looking at me she continued, “I was afraid he was going to be a bachelor forever. He never really seemed interested in anyone since freshman year.”

I thought about the girl, Allison, he said he’d been with. I didn’t really know how to respond, so I just smiled.

“Do you want a drink?” Hayes asked, whispering in my ear, making a shiver float down my spine.

“Water?” I wasn’t brave enough to drink alcohol. Not that night. Not when it was our first together out in the open. I wanted to be in the moment, even if I was terrified down to my bones to be around his friends, in his environment. I wanted desperately to fit in, to feel as though I could slip right into his life and be a part of it. But I didn’t want to drink.

“Sure, I’ll be right back.” He looked around the table. “Anyone else need a refill?” Both David and Bryan held up their beer bottles, but both girls shook their heads. I watched as Hayes headed toward the bar, then turned back to the group, plastering a smile on my face.

“So, how do you know Hayes?” This came from Bryan, the first words I’d heard from him that night, and they were friendly.

“His mom and my mom have been friends forever. Hayes grew up just down the street from me.”

“Oh,” Kristen said sadly, “so you knew Cory then? And their dad?”

I nodded. “Cory was my best friend.” I didn’t add any more information. For once, these people didn’t know all the intricate lines drawn between Hayes and me. So I didn’t share.

“We’re so sorry,” Alice said solemnly.

“Thank you.” I gave them a small smile, but then tried to redirect the conversation. “So, you guys had classes with Hayes?”

“Well, we had some classes with Hayes, but he took them so damn fast that after sophomore year he’d already passed us. But we’d claimed him by then, and we’ve just never really let him make any other friends,” David said with a laugh.

“No joke,” Bryan added, “Hayes kicked our asses at learning.” Both guys laughed and I found myself laughing too.

“And you two are together?” I pointed between David and Kristen. She immediately held out her left hand and wiggled her fingers at me, one of which held a very pretty diamond engagement ring.

“We’re getting married after graduation,” Kristen practically squealed.

“Congratulations,” I said, with genuine enthusiasm.

“So, what do you do?” Alice asked. My blood froze in my veins. Hayes and I hadn’t really discussed what we were going to tell his friends about me, my age, or that I was his student. So, I decided to be vague.

“I’m in school.”

“Oh, yeah? What’s your major?” she asked, leaning in, truly interested in my answer.

“Uh, I’m undeclared still. I have a few years left.” I wanted desperately to get the focus off me and my age. “Are you in school? What’s your major?”

“I’m going for my BFA—fine arts.” She shrugged like it wasn’t a big deal, brushing it off like it meant nothing.

“What does that entail?”

“I’m focused on the visual arts, so painting, ceramics, photography, stuff like that.”

“That’s so amazing. I’m so not creative in any way.” I shook my head, wishing there was something I was good at.

“She’s being modest. She’s amazing. Her paintings are going for a grand at a studio downtown.” Kristen was obviously very proud of her friend.

“That’s amazing,” I replied, honestly impressed. I’d never met a painter before.

“See?” Kristen said, bumping her shoulder into Alice’s. “It’s amazing.”

“Shut up.” Alice smiled then took a sip of her drink.

“So you guys have known Hayes for a few years, then, right?” I asked.

“Pretty much since the beginning,” David said.

“He left for college and I never really saw him much. There’s a whole side of him I don’t really even know.” I found myself leaning forward toward Hayes’s friends, feeling comfortable, wanting them to give me a little tiny piece of him I could tuck away, something new and special.

“I guess you could say the same thing about us. He never talks about home, and even though he only lived two hours away, he never took any of us there to meet his family,” Bryan said, all this while spinning his empty beer bottle on the table. “But that never really bothered us because Hayes is pretty much the best guy we’d ever met. He’s loyal, smart, fun, but he’s also the one person you know you can always count on. He’d sacrifice everything for someone he cared about.”

That I knew. I loved that about him. I nodded, giving them a smile that probably said, “Gosh, what a nice thing to say about my boyfriend.” But I felt more like, his greatest attribute might be his downfall. He’d sacrificed so much already.

As if on cue, Hayes returned to our table with three beer bottles and my water. He handed them out, took a pull off his own, then sat down next to me, and took my hand in his again. This time it was I who leaned over and kissed him. I was the one who showed him, in front of his friends and the whole world, that I had him, finally.