Cassie (The Mitchell/Healy Family #7)(39)
I wanted to tell Cassie about it, but since the investigation was still ongoing, I had to keep all information from the witness.
So I did the best with what I did have – time. I proceeded to make her a coffee with extra cream and sugar. I could hear her walking to the bathroom and wondered if she was going to get a shower or just use the facilities. I walked out on the porch, leaving the door open for when she finished.
It wasn’t long before I heard someone come up behind me. Since I knew my roommate had worked the late shift at the hospital, it could have only been one other person. “Did you see your coffee on the counter?” She came around and sat in the chair beside me.
“I did. Thank you.” She was quiet as she sipped on her hot beverage. “This view is beautiful.”
“It’s what sold the house. Once I was transferred, I needed to find a place pretty fast. I looked at a few places, but they were too close to the city and the lights. I enjoy being out here away from it all. It’s quiet, almost like Vegas doesn’t exist.”
“Where I’m from, it’s quiet too. You can see all the stars in the sky. It smells clean, if that makes sense. I miss the smell of freshly tilled pastures, and when the summer breeze leaves a hint of watermelon.”
“Have you thought about returning? I mean, aside from the investigation, what is keeping you from going back?”
“Pride I suppose.” She chewed on her thumbnail as she spoke about it. “I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to face my family, not after what I’ve done. I didn’t just steal and lie. I disrespected them, and the way I was raised, that’s inexcusable.”
“I don’t believe that. Granted, my parents were also strict when it came to us kids, but they were also kind. There was nothing they wouldn’t have done for their children. I think they would have forgiven my sister, had they survived.”
In that instant I realized I’d divulged information to Cassie, who was still a stranger. I regretted it immediately.
“Wait,” she caught on quick. “Are you saying your sister caused the fire you told me about? Your sister was responsible for your parent’s death?”
I nodded. “Yeah, that’s exactly what I’m saying.” I paused for a moment, contemplating continuing the story. “She was on drugs.” I waited and watched her reaction. When I knew she was waiting for me to keep going, I explained. “She was out of her mind. With the help of her piece-of-shit boyfriend, they set fire to our home. I don’t know whether I was supposed to be inside. I’d spent the night at a friend’s house because he had a video game system my parents wouldn’t buy me. That damn game they refused to let me play saved my life.”
I took a second to gather my composure. Still to this day it hits me hard.
Cassie put her cup down on a small glass table and turned her body to face me. “What happened to your sister?”
“She was charged for their murder. She’s been in a women’s prison since the night it happened.”
“What happened to you?”
“I bounced around with family members and the foster system until I was eighteen. I went to college, and finally when I turned eighteen, I joined the academy.”
“You turned your pain into something productive. Instead of getting lost in grief you used your loss to serve a better purpose. I admire you. I don’t know if I’ll ever be a strong enough person to make a difference. Take the drug use for instance. I didn’t need to be pressured. I wanted to know what it felt like. I wanted to experience it. I actually liked who I was when I did it.”
“And now?” I asked. I couldn’t have her using while staying at my house. I had to draw the line somewhere.
“Now I see what it’s cost me. I saw myself in the mirror for the first time in weeks, and I’m ashamed. I look terrible.”
“You’re still attractive.” It was a gut reaction to comfort her, but it came out very wrong.
She smiled awkwardly. “Thanks, I think. You don’t have to be nice to me. I know why I’m here and what you’re trying to do. I’m not your next charity case, Logan.”
I liked hearing her call me by my first name. It made me feel like she was seeing me as a person instead of an agent. “I never said you were. I’m just trying to help. I have the means to help, and I know you’re in a bad way. That’s all there is to it.”
“I’m grateful. I’d probably be at some fleabag motel if you weren’t around to insist I remain hidden.” She crossed her arms and stared out into the distance. “I’d rather be here than on the street.”
“You know you have a place to go, Cassie. You have a family that loves you.”
“Yeah, well I don’t love myself right now. I can’t go home until I learn how to change that.”
I could appreciate she needed time. I stood and grabbed my cup off the table. “It will get easier as time goes by. Can you come inside with me? There’s something I need to show you.”
She followed behind me until we entered the last room down the hallway. It was empty except for a futon. “This is where you’ll be staying. If it’s not good enough you can put whatever furniture you like in it, as long as you foot the bill. What you bring in, you take out.”
“It’s fine the way it is.” She sat down on the mattress and ran her hands up her thighs. “I really appreciate you helping me. I know what happened last night was my fault. It was wrong of me to run. I’ll regret what happened for the rest of my life.”