Broken Course (Wrecked and Ruined #3)(50)

He stares at me for a minute before finally answering. "Damn it, Sarah. He’s dark right now. It happens. I’ve tried to get him to see someone about it, but he won’t listen. He doesn’t do anything but mope around for a few days, so I just try to keep the business going and let him do his thing."

"Dark? Like depressed?" I ask in shock. "Leo?" I question, because we are clearly talking about two different people.

"It’s not as bad as you’re thinking," he answers, and I can’t do anything but tilt my head in confusion.

What weird alternate universe am I in? I suffer from depression and take a little pill every single day to keep it at bay, but Leo? He might be the happiest person I have ever met. He’s always smiling, and even when his jokes are bad, he never stops making them. I am fully aware that depression can affect even the loudest laugh in the room, but I never would have suspected that it was hiding behind those chocolate-brown eyes.

Without another word, I scan my card and head up the stairs. I’m not even willing to wait for the elevator. No one should be completely alone during a dark spell. Using my key, I let myself in. Quietly, I head down the hall, searching for any sign of Leo. When I reach his bedroom, I slowly swing open the door. His blackout curtains are more than doing their job. Not even the moon breaks into the room. But the hall light behind me reveals him sleeping facedown on his bed with a pillow covering his head. I take a deep breath at the sight. I’ve really missed him.

I toe off my shoes and crawl fully dressed into the bed next to him. He doesn’t budge at first, but as I drag the pillow off his head, he lets out a low growl.

"I was worried about you," I whisper, kissing his naked shoulder.

"Sarah?" His voice is jagged and filled with sleep.

"Yeah, it’s me." I lean in and kiss the lips I have been starved for. It may not bring him any comfort, but just that brief second of contact is like a drug to me. It tingles on my mouth and glides through my body, soothing me in its wake.

"I just want to be alone for a while. Can I call you tomorrow?"

"Yeah. Of course, baby. Go back to sleep," I whisper against his cheek while inhaling his scent. Then I simply roll over and pull the blanket over my body.

"Uhhh…" he says questioningly. "Alone?"

"Oh, I’m not leaving," I respond frankly. "You do whatever you need to do. I won’t bother you. But if you decide you want to talk, I’ll be right here."

"Sarah, I can’t argue with you right now. I really need some space."

"Then roll over. It’s a king-sized bed."

"Please," he begs, but the word catches in his throat.

"I know you think being alone is the solution. And I’m not saying it’s not. I’ll leave if you want. But you should know I’m going to be sleeping on the floor just outside the bedroom door. I’ve been where you are. I know it gets easier. I also know easier is an impossible notion for you to even entertain right now. I’m well aware you think wallowing by yourself is the only answer. However, tomorrow morning, I’m making you breakfast. You don’t have to eat it, but I’m making it all the same. I can’t fix the way you feel, not even with my famous bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich, but I can be here while you suffer. You may want me to leave, Leo. But as long as I’m breathing, you will never truly be alone." I almost choke on the words. They might just be the closest thing I have to tell him that could ever adequately portray my feelings. Love wouldn’t even be enough right now.

"Sarah," he starts but never finishes.

"Together. You told me that a while back. So let’s do this."

With a simple nod, he scoots over to the far side of the bed and rolls away from me. It may seem like a dismissal, but it’s a victory in my book.



Saturday…

"HEY, CAN I buy something on your Kindle?" Sarah asks from the other side of the couch.

"Have at it," I answer, uninterested.

"It might be construed as porn."

My eyes snap to hers and I blink twice. Her only response is a shrug.

"Sure," I respond then go back to staring at the ceiling.



"AS YOUR woman, can I ask Johnson to run errands for me?" Sarah asks randomly.

I lift my head from the dining room table and give her a questioning look.

"Just a small one, and it’s not like ‘go fetch me lunch’ or something."

"Then, by all means, go for it," I answer dryly.

Sarah smiles wide and I look away.



"YOU WANT something to eat?" Sarah asks.

"No," I answer shortly.



Sunday…

"I SENT Johnson to buy it for us." Sarah smiles proudly, popping in a DVD. Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo.

"What in the f*cking hell is that?" I ask with a curled lip.

"Ohhhh, Leo. You are seriously missing out. From the self-proclaimed master of terrible eighties movies, I’m actually disappointed in you right now. This might possibly be the worst eighties movie ever to be made," she laughs.

I stretch a leg down the couch to tangle with hers.



Monday…

"I’M STARVING," I inform Sarah.