Bereft (Seven Year Itch #2)(27)
I’d slept with Chad.
The Chad.
What was I thinking, right? What kind of women degrades herself the way I had?
I knew exactly why I’d gone through with it, and as every single second of our time together came back to me, I felt a smile forming across my face. Sure, there was guilt, but to what degree should I have felt bad for my actions when I was only trying to alleviate some of the looming pain I’d been under?
I didn’t know what someone else in my position would have done. Maybe they’d be able to forgive their husband for his infidelities. Maybe I was just as terrible of a person for doing the same thing. However, in my opinion my actions were justified. With all the pain I’d endured, I felt I deserved to feel cared about, even if it were only a temporary fix. The image of Kyla and Grayson would forever be burned into my retinas. It may not have been right, but it sure as hell felt good either way.
I wasn’t certain what to say to Chad. We’d obviously taken things too far, and I wondered if he was trying to rush out before things got too awkward. Maybe he was trying to leave so I wouldn’t be able to talk to him about what happened. I stayed in bed, determined to pretend I was still sleeping when he exited the bathroom.
I heard him get out, and open the cabinets looking for a towel. I suppose I should have ran in and left him one on the counter, but I was too flustered to consider walking around with no clothes on, which was how we fell asleep.
Chad came out of the bathroom, steam still lifting off his wet skin. He was wrapped in only a towel from the waist down, not that I needed to be reminded of what was hiding underneath. I was probably going to be sore for a few days because of it.
I was surprised when he came over and climbed onto the bed, leaning over to brush the hair away from my face. “I need to get going.”
“Okay.”
“We should talk about that business plan soon. Let me know what day is good for you and we’ll set something up.”
“Okay.” I realized I’d answered two questions in a row with the same response, but I was a little taken back.
“You have my number to get in touch with me, right?”
“Yeah, I’m pretty sure if I don’t it’s easy to get.” I sat up and tried to act professional. “Do you need me to come into the office today?”
“No. That won’t be necessary. If I were you I’d take the rest of the week off. You’re going through a lot of shit, Rach. Get things figured out first. I’m going to need a fresh head on you when you return.”
“I can’t promise a few days will fix everything that’s wrong in my life.”
“Yeah, wishful thinking,” he said with a little chuckle. “Are we okay? I know last night was unexpected. I don’t want things to be weird between us.”
“I don’t either, though I wouldn’t blame you if you did feel that way.”
“I’m good. Last night was intense. I hope you got something out of it.”
“You could say that.”
He raised his brow and seemed to be studying my face. “I better get out of here. I have an early appointment I can’t miss.”
He reached forward and kissed me on the cheek. The cheek. “I’ll see you soon.”
I don’t know what I expected. I suppose I assumed he would go on and on about how last night was the best of his life, and he never expected to hit it off with me so well. I think I expected praise for being adventurous.
It didn’t take me long to hate being in my house alone. I was tired of seeing the pictures hung on the walls and the memories we’d never get to make together again. I knew I had to get out. I had to keep my thoughts at bay with a new project.
Even though Chad said to take a few days, I dressed and prepared to go into the office. The sooner we got everything up and running, the more work would be left on my plate, which meant more time I could spend away from my lonely house.
I went through my contacts, setting up an afternoon appointment, which would include the company attorney and accountant. The lawyer firm didn’t deal with divorce. I was still too distraught to mentally deal with that kind of permanent fix, so it was a good thing.
Chad would be surprised, probably a little pissed I overstepped, but it was important I made sure I still had a job to go to in the future. I was going to go ahead and get things set up, if he didn’t like it he could ream me out later.
After my train ride, and a quick walk to the office, I entered with a set of goals in order. I’d made a plan up in my head, consisting of the amount of employees I’d like to keep for the agency, and a recommendation of qualified individuals who could work on Chad’s new project. I wanted to save as many jobs as possible. There were probably going to be a few people who were too bitter to consider returning. They’d been told their job was over. If they didn’t enjoy what they did, it was always a perfect excuse to find something else. For the people who invested years with the company, it was the break they needed. They’d be able to provide for their families.
I wasn’t surprised the receptionist was on the phone when I walked on. She waved to me, not seeming like my being there was a shock. I headed toward my office, finding it in the same way I’d left it. The conference room door was closed. I wondered if Chad was inside with his grandfather Charles. I was curious to find out if he’d told him about my plan, or if after last night he was going to tell me to find another position at the loony bin.