Bereft (Seven Year Itch #2)(26)

I hung up the phone and immediately dialed Rachel. I just wanted to hear her voice. Lucky for me, I got her voicemail too. “This is Rachel Lewis. Please leave your name and number and I’ll get back to you as soon as possible.”

I listened for the beep and hesitated. What did I say to her after last night. She’d pretty much sent me packing for a lifetime of misery. How was I to even approach her without some kind of caution? To make matters worse, I knew she’d screwed around with someone else to pay me back. It was immature, but I couldn’t blame her. I knew what it was like to act on impulse. She was vulnerable, and at the right moment he’d be able to take advantage of it. He’d probably been hitting on her for months, just waiting for the right time to make his move.

I wasn’t sure how old the guy was, but it was obvious he was still in his twenties. I’d been through a lot in my life, but never experienced this type of jealousy before. I couldn’t compete – another reason which made it easier to relate to my distraught wife. She’d probably picked this guy on purpose, knowing if I ever found out it would be like a kick in the balls.

By nine-thirty I was on my way into work. I’d keep busy on work-orders, and try my best to make it through the day without leaving early. I had enough time accrued to take a few personal days, but didn’t want to do it if I didn’t have to.

Once inside, I locked my office door, taking a seat behind my desk. On it was a picture of my family, the three of us. We were all smiling, but what made the moment perfect was that Rachel and I were looking deeply into each other’s eyes. The photographer hadn’t told us to do it. It happened accidentally and she’d captured it. It was my favorite picture of us, and I’d had it on my desk since the very day we picked them up.

Back then things were easy. Rachel and I talked to each other. We came home every night and shared meals together. Our weekends were filled with adventures. Back then we were full-time parents. We had a mutual reason to work as a team. Things were different since Stephanie went off to college. The house was quiet, and my new hours had taken a toll on our relationship. I knew she was tired by the time I got home, but I’d felt like she was neglecting me. Why couldn’t she wake up if I was in the mood? Was she tired of being with me? Did she stop missing me?

I suppose it was way too late to try to and fix what was broken. Still, my mind wouldn’t let me stop wondering. I felt like if she’d give me a chance I could convince her to take me back, even though I think I knew it was a long shot. She’d made sure of it when she gave her body to another.

I tried to focus on my workload, first by checking my messages from the previous day.

The first one was from Kyla. “Hey, it’s me. I’m just checking in. I know you said to leave you alone, but there’s no reason we can’t be friends. I miss you, Grayson. Call me back.”

The next six messages were work calls, then two more followed from Kyla again. I hated she’d gotten the direct number to my office. To be honest, I hated her. If she hadn’t come onto me, this would have never happened. I wouldn’t have thought about her inappropriately, and I certainly wouldn’t have made a move. I was a good man; a perfect husband, and I’d thrown it away so recklessly.

I considered calling some of our mutual friends to check on her, but I knew Rachel would get pissed off. She was always so damn adamant about other people knowing our business.

Since I was trying to get her to speak to me, I had to tread lightly. Rachel was like a ticking time bomb. I couldn’t recall ever seeing her so verbally aggressive. This was a side of my wife I didn’t like, and what was worse was that I’d brought it on. Now she was unhinged, acting on impulse and doing things she wouldn’t normally be caught doing. She wanted me to suffer, and I felt it was necessary to let her know her plan was working.

I called her phone again, this time prepared to leave a message. When the chimed sounded I didn’t hold back. “Rachel, it’s me, Grayson. I’m hoping you won’t erase this before you listen to the whole message. I love you. You need to know that first and foremost. You mean everything to me, and I know I f*cked up. God, do I know it. I wish I could take it back. It wasn’t worth it, none of it. Losing you makes me want to die. I already feel dead inside. I don’t know what Kyla said to you, but she’s lying. There are no feelings between us. She’s crazy. I’ve never had any kind of emotional attachment to that girl. It was just sex.” I paused for a moment. “I know what you did last night. I came back around and saw you through the window. If you did it for revenge I get it. I just don’t want you to be hurt. If you need time I’ll wait, but I’ll never give up. Please call me. Let me know you’re okay. I miss you. I miss coming home and seeing you sleeping. I miss the way you sneak around in the mornings to keep from waking me. I miss us, Rachel. I need you. Please don’t give up on us. It doesn’t have to be over.”

After I hung up I wept silently at my desk. I never thought I’d be in this predicament. I didn’t see my wife kicking me out, or losing her love. I’d always been so sure she’d be there for me for the rest of my life. Now I wondered if I’d have anyone. Maybe I’d live out my life alone. It was unbearable to consider.





Chapter 13


Rachel


I woke up when the sun came in through the window. It was nearly seven in the morning. The sound of the shower was obvious, and for a second I thought it was Grayson getting ready for work. Then it all came rushing back.