Actual Stop (Agent O’Connor #1)(42)

“I’m going to go with yes.”

She shot me a quizzical look. “What do you mean you’re ‘going to go with’? Don’t you know?”

I shrugged and tried to ignore the misery gnawing away at my insides and making me faintly nauseous. “She was okay when she left my place last night.” Well, physically anyway.

“Ah. You guys had a fight.” It wasn’t a question.

I hesitated. A small part of me didn’t want to disclose any details to Allison. She’d already seen me break down once. I didn’t think I’d be able to look her in the eye if I lost it twice in one day. Besides, despite our past, we really weren’t friends. We never had been. Plus, I didn’t need pity from anyone at the moment, least of all her.

Also, a miniscule part of me felt stupid admitting that Lucia had dumped me, as if I were afraid Allison would take it as further proof I just wasn’t good girlfriend material. Not that she needed any more, apparently, or we’d still be together. But I was humiliated and upset enough about the dissolution of the only relationship I’d been interested in pursuing since her without adding that on top of it. And I deliberately avoided any examination as to why that would even bother me. I could only juggle so many balls at once, and it was best to leave that one on the ground.

“Yeah. Something like that.”

“Well, I’m sure you guys will work it out.” Allison was making one last visual sweep of the room. “She really loves you.”

A bitter bark of laughter bubbled up in my throat, and I couldn’t bite it back. The harsh, shrill sound caught Allison’s full attention. “And therein lies the problem because apparently I’m heartless.” I hadn’t meant for that little gem to slip out, either, but there it was. I really needed to get some sleep.

Allison frowned. “What?”

“Yeah, I know. Heartless. That’s what she said. Ironic, isn’t it? Since you seemed to have the exact opposite problem with me.”

I gasped and froze the instant the words were out of my mouth but couldn’t call them back, so they hung leaden in the air between us. A multitude of emotions flowed beneath Allison’s ebony eyes, and then her expression went cool. She turned to the door.

I grabbed her arm, borderline desperate. She and I had somehow managed to reach a fragile truce over the last couple of days. Hell, we’d even found a way to get along and have some fun, overlooking the specter of the past that would always be between us. And I was threatening to f*ck that up with my thoughtlessness. What’d happened with Lucia hadn’t been anyone’s fault but my own and was a completely separate issue from my history with Allison. I’d do well to remember that and think before I spoke.

“Hey,” I said, my voice soft. Past conversations flickered through my mind, and I was grateful she hadn’t shaken off my grip, a move she’d been famous for once upon a time. “I’m sorry.”

Allison turned back to face me and looked into my eyes. Frustration marred her features for a fraction of a second, and something akin to panic grated harshly against the back of my throat.

“Look, can we forget I said anything? Please?” My clumsy words were ineloquent, as they always were whenever I spoke to her about anything important.

The silence grew as we stared at one another, and a feeling of dread trickled slowly down my esophagus and dripped icily onto the organs below. Finally, much to my relief, she spoke. “You’re a jerk.”

I nodded, and my insides started to slowly warm again. Whenever she said that, I knew she’d pretty much forgiven me. “I know.” I flashed her a tentative grin. “But you love me anyway.”

Allison didn’t return my smile. Her expression was solemn for the instant she continued to regard me before she turned around. With her back to me I almost missed her quiet reply, which I suspect was the point.

“I know.”





Chapter Thirteen


Much like the day before, Allison and I had way too much to do to let something as silly as a few thoughtless words mar the entire day. Before I knew it, it was after nine o’clock, and we were sitting in my office putting together our books for the motorcade, quizzing one another over the details of the visit to make sure we hadn’t forgotten anything.

“The motorcade security guys are all settled?” Allison asked. She looked up at me from her place behind my desk.

“Yup. No worries. They’re set until we pick up the cars in the morning.”

“Cars are going to get gassed and washed?”

“All taken care of.”

“Security sweeps start at what time?”

“Oh-six-thirty for the cars. They start earlier than that for the sites themselves.” I consulted my notes. “Um…It’s looking like oh-four-hundred for the Stock Exchange, oh-five-thirty for the LZ, and I think they said they wanted to start sweeping the airport at oh-four-hundred, as well. I’d have to talk to the site guy to be sure. Drivers are arriving at oh-six-hundred. Wheels down is scheduled for ten-hundred hours.”

“So we should leave at maybe five to go out to the airport. I’d like to be there well before the motorcade sweep.”

“You’re the boss.”

Allison made a face at me, shook her head, and handed me a completed book to add to the pile. I took it without a word and immediately went back to compiling the packets of paperwork each site agent needed to have. I was relieved to be almost finished. I was exhausted, both physically and emotionally. The two days of no sleep had caught up to me, and I wanted nothing more than to go home, cry for a bit, and then crash. I quickly did the math in my head. If we left by ten, I could drop Allison off at her hotel and be in bed and hopefully asleep a little after eleven, which would give me a solid four and a half hours of rest. I sighed longingly.