Whisper (Whisper #1)(24)
“Someone should have moved you into a place like this ages ago. But we can’t change the past, only the future.”
His voice is rougher than normal, as if he’s speaking more to himself than to me.
“Cami will show you around,” he continues. “Your schedule hasn’t changed, but the guards will pick you up and drop you off here from now on.” He pauses, seems to debate saying more, lets out a breath and goes on. “I’m still working on getting them to leave off the handcuffs.”
The ground is dissolving under my feet. Surely I must be sinking into an alternate dimension. One where silent girls are befriended by armored knights and bouncing children and swallowed up in dreams so real they bleed life into the very walls, turning the blandness of whites, grays and beiges into rainbows so dazzling that the air itself comes alive with their colors.
I open my mouth, close it, open it again and then snap it shut. More than anything, I want to say something. I want to give voice to my gratitude. I’m nowhere near willing to trust him, but he’s given me something precious, and I want him to know just how much it means to me. So, tentatively — very, very tentatively — I stretch my hand forward and wrap my fingers around his forearm, squeezing gently for a fraction of a second.
From a normal person, an arm touch isn’t anything special. But from me, the simple gesture is like a shout. And Ward’s expression tells me he understands all the words I’m not saying.
“Chip —”
Cami interrupts us, gliding down the hallway again. “Time to say goodnight, Landon.”
Ward looks like he’s swallowing words as he pulls in a sharp breath and turns away, nodding.
“’Night, Cam.” He kisses her forehead. “Call me if you need anything.”
“Yeah, yeah.” She waves him toward the door with a smile. “Don’t worry, we’ll be fine.”
“See you tomorrow, Chip,” Ward says to me. After one last glance, he disappears through the door, and it seals shut behind him.
I’m in a daze as Cami grabs my hand and shows me around. The suite is a more colorful version of Ward’s quarters but with an extra bedroom. She’s talking excitedly, but my mind is stuck replaying the moment I just shared with her brother. It’s only when we reach my bedroom that my attention returns to the present.
I stand in the doorway, fighting back tears for the second time tonight. The room — my room — is like something from a daydream. Since we’re underground, there are no windows, but an oil painting on the pale-yellow wall shows a beach leading into an endless blue ocean. It’s better than any view a window could offer, but as wonderful as it is, it’s nothing compared to the bed — which is just as luxurious as Ward’s.
With a skip in her step, Cami leads me over to a wardrobe and opens it to reveal a plethora of clothes — all for me. I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. I run my fingers along the materials, overwhelmed.
“No more uniforms for you,” she says happily. Reading my expression, she quietly adds, “It’s a lot to take in, isn’t it?”
When I nod, she curls an arm around me and pulls me into a side hug.
“Don’t worry, Jane. We’ll have you feeling like a human again in no time. Then all this will seem normal to you, just like it should.”
Perhaps she’s right, but how long will those feelings last?
I only have fifteen days left to offer a convincing reason for why I should be allowed to remain at Lengard. And no matter how much my circumstances may have changed, I will not — I absolutely will not — answer any of their questions. I can’t. Which means the clock is still counting down, becoming louder with every pass of the minute hand.
Cami doesn’t know. Ward wouldn’t have told her, I’m sure. That pleases me, because it means she won’t treat me like I’m a ticking time bomb. I just might be able to enjoy the days I have left, a final gift I could never have allowed myself to imagine.
The room, the bed, the clothes, the company — they’re perfect. For the first time in over two and a half years, I don’t feel alone, cold, scared or uncomfortable. I’m determined to hold on to this feeling of freedom for as long as I can …
For as long as I have left.
CHAPTER NINE
Twelve more days pass without Ward mentioning the countdown.
When I see him every afternoon, he hands me a book as usual, and I read. Sometimes he speaks, saying words that have little or no consequence. Other times he writes, reads or just sits there, staring at nothing — or staring at me. It’s the latter that makes me uncomfortable. I always keep my eyes averted when I sense him watching me, but it still makes me feel like my skin is simultaneously freezing and burning.
It’s been twenty-six days since our first session together, and I still know very little about Landon Ward. What I do know is that things changed after I spent the night in his room, and not just with Ward — Enzo has been different, too. Both have been uncharacteristically protective, to the point that, the day following our dinner with the Falon family, Enzo insisted on walking me back to my suite after our training session rather than sending me off with the guards. He waited while I showered — and since it was in my own private bathroom, there was no time limit, which was absolute bliss; he ate lunch with me — and it wasn’t my usual bland, protein-enhanced meal but, instead, the leftover lasagna and vegetables that Esther had dropped off for Cami and me that morning; and then he hung out on our couch until it was time for my session with Vanik. Enzo then personally escorted me to the laboratory — which meant no guards again, as well as no handcuffs — and he proceeded to blow my mind by leaning against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest and glaring so intently at the scientist that I felt chills break out on my skin from the frosty look on his face.