Thin Love (Thin Love, #1)(83)
That verbal blow did sting and Keira knew she’d finally gotten through to him. Kona dropped her wrist, but he didn’t walk away. Keira could see the return of his fury, the quick lick of anger that had softened at her outburst. Kona grabbed her shoulders, fingers biting down, breath hard, uneven before his hands fell to her hips and he picked her up and threw her onto the bed.
Almost immediately, he was repentant. Those big, dark eyes widened, his hands shifted through his hair like he wanted to yank out each strand. He took a step, then must have thought better of it before he covered his mouth. “Oh my God. I just… Keira…”
She wasn’t angry. She didn’t know how it happened or why, but Kona’s action twisted something inside her, pushed aside the anger, the grief and that warped, wild part of her brain that made her attack Kona that night at Nathan’s came back to the surface. As she stared at his shocked face, the expression that told her he couldn’t believe he’d lost it, Keira felt the sweet zip of energy between them; it pulled her nipples tight against her shirt. It had her clit throbbing against the thin fabric of her thong. It made her wetter than she’d ever been in her life.
“Kona.” Keira’s voice was deep, sounded nothing like her. Kona’s wide eyes stretched when he looked at her, when they shifted down at her nipples. “Come here.”
Two long strides had him in front of her, had his arms around her. “I’m sorry. Wildcat, I’m so sorry…”
“Shut up… kiss me.” She yanked on his face, nails biting into the back of his neck. “Now.” That kiss pulled everything from her mind; her broken father, her mother’s drunken anger, Kona’s lying, everything that wasn’t his wide tongue and full lips. All Keira felt was his hands on her ass, pushing her closer to him, his teeth against her neck.
Keira pulled him back against the mattress by his collar, loving how heavy his body felt against her. She was still reeling from that bright spark of rage only Kona could ignite, but he tugged up her shirt, his teeth against her nipples was too much, too drugging and Keira let go of her anger and let it pour out of her, not caring that she was scared for him, not caring that his promises were pointless and hollow. She only knew she wanted him. She only knew that she needed his touch, his mouth, his heart.
She hadn’t worn much after her shower, a thin t-shirt and small thong and so it was not difficult to have herself open and naked before him and when Kona raised up, pulled his damp CPU t-shirt over his shoulders with one hand, Keira moaned at just the sight of him, so ready for her, eager to have her.
She was calmer then, too intoxicated by the way he looked at her, by the mingle of rain and sweat on his body. Keira watched him, stared into his eyes as she reached one hand down his chest, over that sculpted stomach until she came to his waistband, fingers against the button of his jeans, moving the zipper down, one tantalizing metal tooth at a time.
This was where he usually stopped her. He’d been so careful with her before then, never letting her touch him where she really wanted, telling her if she did, he’d be unable to stop himself from taking her. Now he did nothing but stare down at her, breath in hard, labored bursts, teeth gritted as she pushed his jeans over his hips and wrapped her long fingers around his impressive, throbbing dick.
“Shit,” he said through his teeth. That long vein on his neck throbbed and Keira got to her knees, licked against it, up his neck.
“You don’t have to hold back, Kona.” She took his ear between her teeth as she continued to rub him, each stroke making a shudder work in his chest. “I don’t want you to stop me.”
“Keira… shit.” He moved his hands in a flash, one going into her hair, pulling her head back so he could look at her in the dim light of her lamp, shadowing their faces; the other grabbing her wrist to stop her movements. “I swear to Christ, I can’t take you touching me. I want you too much.” Kona squeezed his eyes shut when she stroked him once more. “Five… five minutes ago you wanted me out of your life.” He pulled on her hair again, directing her mouth closer to his. “Now you wanna touch me? Now… now you want me? I don’t work like that anymore, Wildcat. Not with you. I… I love you too much to not want all of you.”
Keira pulled her hand back, and moved out of Kona’s grip, heart beating so quickly that she could feel the drum of it on her temples. “What did you say?”
Kona’s expression went soft, open and Keira loved the way his smile came easy, how his thumb rubbed over her face. She could only make out the faint outline of his shoulders, his hair, but she felt him. She felt him everywhere. “I love you, Keira and if we do this, right now, there will be no turning back. If you let me have you, that’s it for me. That’s it for you. I’m yours. Is that what you want?”
Dave Matthews still sang in the background, repeating over and over, and here Kona was, promising to crash into her, promising her all the things she wanted from him. He would be the end of her, she knew that, just then, in that moment. Kona Hale would love her, she didn’t doubt that, but would he stay? Or would he break her heart again and again? She didn’t know if she could survive the destruction he’d leave behind if he left, if he broke her and left. She didn’t know if she was willing to gamble again, to risk the loss that love always brought.
“I… will you stop using? And don’t tell me you will just for me to say yes. I need you to be straight with me.”