The Fragile Ordinary(101)

“I’m sorry, Comet. I told my mom I don’t want to leave, so we’re staying. And that doesn’t mean you have to forgive me or even want to be with me again, and you can even be pissed at me for making such a huge decision based off the fact that I love you because I know you hate the whole codependency thing but—”

I cut him off midramble throwing my arms around his neck and tugging his head down to mine so I could kiss him. The feel of his warm lips moving against mine felt so utterly epic, and I poured every emotion inside of me since we broke up into that kiss. Relief and love were the foremost.

Tobias broke the kiss to wrap his arms tighter around me and hug me so hard that he lifted me off the ground. “I missed you so much,” he said hoarsely, as I clung to him. “I’m so sorry.”

When I was finally back on my feet, I caressed his face and said, “No more apologies.”

“I’ll try not to do anything where one will be necessary afterward.”

“Hmm, I don’t think I’m naive enough to believe that will happen,” I joked.

He shook his head in wonder. “I know how lucky I am to have you, Comet. I hope you know that.”

“It’s nice to hear it anyway.” I smiled, trying not to cry like a cheeseball.

“And I am so proud of you for getting up on that stage tonight. And doing it in front of your dad...you’re amazing.”

“Thank you.” I studied him, seeing the weary sadness that still lingered in the back of his eyes. “What can I do to be there for you now?”

He frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Stevie.”

I felt him tense against me. “I don’t have a magic answer to that. I can’t help how I feel about him. I should have done something more for him, and that guilt won’t just go away. I have to be honest about that.”

I nodded, understanding.

Stevie’s death had changed Tobias. That was the truth. It had changed us both. It was different for Tobias, because he hadn’t found a way to forgive himself yet. Maybe he never would. Maybe it would continue to change him or maybe not.

That was the thing about living in the now and accepting that most people weren’t heroic storybook characters. They could be extraordinary, but most days they were flawed and ordinary. And ordinary people had wounds that sometimes never healed.

I loved Tobias. I would accept him, wounds and all, as I had from the moment we met, just as he had accepted me with all of mine.

When you were in love like we were in love, there existed a temporary forever ahead of you. A knowledge that what we had was for life, but that life was only guaranteed by the second.

Which meant that every second I had a choice to make, I had to choose what would really make me happy. What most people never learned was that sometimes what would make us happy the most also scares us the most. Sometimes being happy meant being brave.

I aimed to be brave every second of every day.

*





THE FRAGILE ORDINARYSAMANTHA YOUNG





Acknowledgments

Never have I written a book with a heroine I understand as much as I understand Comet. I tapped into so much of who I was as a teenager to write Comet’s story and it reminded me of the wonderful friendships from childhood that I am thankful for.

Ashleen, I am so grateful for your friendship and have been since we were twelve years old. You were the first friend I ever met who I felt truly understood me. When we sat in class together that first day of high school it was the first time I didn’t feel alone at school. And now here we are twenty years later, still best friends, and you’re still there for me even with an ocean between us. If your friendship wasn’t enough, you handle almost everything else business-related in my life. Because of that I could give all my focus to Comet’s story. You’re a rock star.

Also a big thanks to Shanine. You’ve taught me so much about what it means to be a good person, and I’ve learned by listening to how passionate you are what it means to be a fantastic teacher. Whenever I write a great teacher into my story, you are my muse. As are you, Kate. You are brilliant in every way. Thank you for all your advice regarding Mr. Stone and high school English.

Moreover, thank you to Margo Lipschultz for believing in me as a writer, for seeing the potential in Comet’s story and asking me to pursue it. And a massive thank you to my editor at Harlequin Teen, Natashya Wilson, not only for helping mold The Fragile Ordinary into the best possible version of itself, but for truly understanding Comet. It’s been an absolute pleasure working on her story with you.

Furthermore a huge thank you to the art team at Harlequin Teen for producing one of my favorite covers ever. I smile every time I see it.

These acknowledgments wouldn’t be complete without thanking my wonderful mum and dad. Comet and I may share many similarities but I’m glad to say I do not share her bad luck in parents. You are the best parents anyone could ask for. Thank you for dog-sitting my two little tornadoes while I hid myself away in the Highlands for a week to finish this book. I’m fortunate to know I can always count on you.

Speaking of, thank you to my agent Lauren Abramo. You always, always have my back. It means so much to me and I know I’ve said that a lot but it bears repeating.

And finally, as always, to you my reader: the biggest thank you of all.