Shut Out(17)

chapter seven


Randy and I had our first big fight this past June, right after school let out. We’d broken up, and I was devastated. But on a hot night in July, Chloe decided to get me out of my funk and drag me to a party at Vikki McPhee’s house.

“Come on,” she’d said, pulling me from my bedroom that night. “You’ll never get over Randy if you don’t put yourself out there. A few meaningless hookups are exactly what you need right now.”

When we’d arrived at the party, Chloe gave me a once-over and sighed. “I still can’t believe you’re wearing that. You have some sexy clothes. Why aren’t you rocking them?”

I rolled my eyes and edged past her into the house. The place already smelled like beer and pot, and the walls were practically shuddering against the pounding bass of the stereo. I wrapped my arms around myself and moved toward the perimeter of the room, staying close to the wall. I wanted to fall through the floor. This kind of chaos wasn’t what I needed right then. Or ever.

Chloe ran up beside me. “Let’s get something to drink.”

“You know I don’t drink,” I said.

“For once in your life, can’t you just let go? Lose control a little? You might actually enjoy not agonizing over every little thing.”

I shook my head.

“Have it your way,” she said, shrugging. “But please, promise me you’ll go talk to people? Have a little bit of fun tonight, okay?”

“Fine.”

She squeezed my shoulder before hurrying off toward Vikki’s kitchen. I pressed my back against the wall and looked around. More people were arriving, and many were already dancing and shouting along with the music. In the corner, I saw a side table topple over when a boy fell backward onto it. I cringed. I had to get out of there.

Keeping my word to Chloe, I said a quick, “Hey, how are you?” to Kelsey as she passed me, wearing an expensive-looking white sundress. She gave an annoyed glance—probably deciding that she didn’t want to talk to anyone dressed as badly as I was—and moved on. Just like I’d hoped.

With my task complete, I edged around the living room and headed toward the back door. Leaving the party wasn’t an option, since Chloe was my ride—as usual—but I could at least get out of this room.

The sun had just set when I pushed open the door to the back porch. But instead of finding the backyard empty, I discovered Cash Sterling sitting on the steps.

“Oh, sorry,” I muttered, my hand still on the door. “I’ll leave.”

He was sitting on the top step of the wooden porch, one of his legs pulled up to his chest while the other stretched out toward the steps below him. His chin had been resting thoughtfully in his hand, but when he heard me, his head turned in my direction.

“Hey,” he said. And I thought I saw his eyes light up a little, though it could have just been the flickering porch light playing tricks. “No. Stay. I don’t mind.”

Even though I’d wanted to be alone, I decided that Cash would be better company than the crowd inside Vikki’s living room. I shut the door and walked over to sit beside him on the steps. The smile he gave me was so sweet, so warm, that even in my bad mood, I couldn’t help smiling back at him.

I didn’t really know Cash that well. We’d had a few classes together, and back before Ellen and I had stopped talking I would see him hanging out with Adam, her boyfriend. We’d talked maybe twice, but we’d never been alone together. Until now.

“So what are you doing out here?” I asked. “Already tired of the party?”

Cash laughed. “I guess you could say that. It’s not really my thing. A few of the guys from the soccer team asked me to play designated driver, though. So I agreed to help out. How about you?”

“My best friend made me come.”

“Why? I mean, if you don’t want to be here…”

“She thinks it’ll be good for me,” I explained. “My boyfriend and I… Well, we just split up, and she decided it would be good for me to be social.”

Cash looked away, and I watched as his sneaker scuffed against the wooden step a few feet below us. “So you and Randy aren’t together now?”

I almost asked how he knew who my boyfriend was, but I stopped myself. The answer was obvious. Randy was the quarterback, one of the most popular boys in school. Everyone knew who he was dating. Not to mention, Hamilton boasted only about a hundred students per graduating class. It was almost difficult not to be aware of who dated whom.

“Yes.”

“How long ago?”

“Three weeks.”

“I’m sorry.”

He didn’t sound sorry, though. I couldn’t read his tone—caught somewhere between indifference and smugness. I almost stood up and walked back inside then. Almost ran away from his insensitivity.

But before I could move, he turned to face me again, freezing me on the spot with his gorgeous eyes. “Have you ever played the Star Game?”

I just blinked at him.

Cash’s cheeks turned just the slightest bit red before he elaborated. “You have to be here because of your friend, and I’m driving home guys who won’t want to leave until the keg is empty. We’re going to be out here awhile, so we might as well find some way to entertain ourselves, you know? So have you ever played the Star Game?”