P.S. I Like You(64)

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Can we just wait to talk to him?”

“Wait until when?” Then her eyes went wide. “Oh! Do you like Wyatt’s coach? Are you in the ‘being mysterious’ phase?”

I groaned, thinking about that letter waiting to be read under the desk. “I am in the very opposite of the mysterious phase.”

“Then you’re not doing it right.”

“I know. I’m sure I’m failing miserably. I’ve broken every rule.” I got out of the car now that Cade was well past us. “See you after school.”



Chemistry. The desk waited in front of me like a headstone in a zombie movie. I was stuck at the door, staring at it, not sure if in my zombie metaphor that I’d be the girl to charge forward with a pickax. I’d probably be the one running the other way.

“You going to walk or block the doorway?” Sasha said from behind me, forcing her way around me, her shoulder slamming into mine. I tripped forward but didn’t fall. It gave me the momentum I needed to keep walking.

I sat down, counted to three, and went for the letter. My hand only found a fresh piece of gum. So it had been option number two. He liked some other lucky girl. And now he knew it was me. At least I’d told him in a letter, where I didn’t have to watch him be horrified. My hopes fell to my feet, crushed more than I thought they’d be.

Why had I thought a mainstream popular guy like Cade would fall for an off-the-beaten-path girl like me, anyway?

My eyes went blurry and I forced them clear again with a few hard blinks. For the first time in a while, I made myself take decent notes, even though Mr. Ortega had long ago stopped requesting them at the end of class.

When the bell mercifully sounded, putting me out of my misery, Mr. Ortega called my name. “Wait for a moment please.”

Sasha gave me a satisfied look so I wondered if she had somehow gotten me in trouble again. As soon as everyone had left, Mr. Ortega held up a folded note. “Is this what you were looking for earlier?” he asked.

My heart started beating hard. He was holding hope in his hand and I wanted to charge him for it. I nodded.

“You and Cade think I’m blind?”

My shoulders tensed. Did that mean he stole my note yesterday as well? The one I’d written to Cade telling him who I was?

“No.”

“I’m glad to hear that because your actions would say otherwise.”

“I’m sorry.”

“No more letter writing in class.”

“I didn’t write my last one in class,” I said even though I knew it didn’t matter.

“Beside the point.”

“Can I have it now?” I asked, nodding toward the letter he held up like a prize I couldn’t win.

“I am going to hang on to this. When you bring up your Chemistry grade, I will turn it over. Until then … ” He opened his desk drawer and dropped it in. “It’s mine.”

It took all my will power not to drop to my knees and beg Mr. Ortega to have mercy on my poor overworked nerves. I grabbed my backpack and headed for the door. The halls were empty, everyone already at lunch. If Cade had written me a positive response upon finding out my identity, wouldn’t he be standing in the hall right now with his amazing smile telling me he wanted to get married and have indie rock babies with me? Unless he hadn’t gotten my letter at all and still didn’t know who I was.

I replayed the final words Mr. Ortega said over and over. I pictured the note falling into the open desk drawer. I needed that letter. I was going to get that letter. It would tell me if Cade had gotten mine. It would tell me if I needed to avoid him forever or not.



I sent my sister a text during final period telling her I was getting a ride home with Isabel. Then I sent Isabel one too, hoping she’d agree to that ride. And I added: Want to help me steal some keys from the front office after school so I can rescue the letter??

I’d told her what had happened during lunch. She was just as horrified as I was. Her solution was for me to just tell Cade face-to-face. My solution was one that might save me a lifetime of humiliation depending on what the letter said.

Now, she texted back: Of course I do. I’ll distract, you retrieve.

And that’s where I was now. Retrieving.

I could hear Isabel’s voice at the front desk talking to Mrs. Clark. I had snuck in the back door of the main office and was heading for the long desk. Isabel had a tough job. She not only had to distract Mrs. Clark while I stole the keys, but the whole time I was gone too so that I could put them back without her discovering they were missing. I’d promised Isabel I’d be as fast as possible. I’d also promised her an ice cream sundae, but that wasn’t helpful to think about now.

Mr. Ortega didn’t have a seventh-period class so I knew he’d be long gone. I only hoped he hadn’t locked his desk like he did the door.

The keys were easy to get; I’d used them before because I was trustworthy and responsible. I was pretty sure I would single-handedly destroy that reputation with Mrs. Clark if she saw me now.

I tucked the keys into my pocket so they wouldn’t jingle and rushed back outside. Once out, I picked up my pace to a run. I was not a runner. I did not like to run. But I ran like I meant it.

Maybe I should’ve joined the cross-country team after all because I wasn’t half bad at this. For about one stretch of sidewalk. By the time I made it to the Science building, I had cursed not only the entire cross-country team, but the sport as a whole. I had a cramp that was sending a painful jolt up my side and I could barely breathe.