I Was Born for This(32)
What’s the point in being in The Ark if we’re going to get stalked, harassed, have photographs leaked, privacy stolen, and never, ever be at peace?
I’ve been gripping my cup of tea so tightly, I don’t realise how hard I slam the mug down on the counter, sending shards of ceramic flying all over the kitchen. There’s a sudden pain in my palm and I turn it towards me to find I’ve cut my hand open. Blood trails down my wrist and plops onto the floor.
So, the latest is that I’m struggling to process that the person I met last night was the person who has been in a relationship with Rowan Omondi for at least, if sources are accurate, the past two years.
She spoke to him on the phone right in front of me.
I mean, it’s her, all right. It’s really bloody her. If the name wasn’t enough – what’s the bet there’s another Bliss Lai in the world – the pictures confirmed it. There she is. Exactly the person I met last night: the pout, the sleek black hair, the soft cheeks and rounded curves. Always pictured with a cheeky smile.
I spoke to her for ages.
And I had absolutely no idea.
Oh, fuck.
I showed her the picture of Jimmy as my lock screen.
I talked to her about Jowan.
She probably thinks I’m absolute fandom trash.
Juliet has left the room, probably to go and mourn on her own for a bit, leaving me to deal with The Message.
I start by having a look at Bliss’s profile. Her username is just her name: @blisslai. Her bio reads ‘I do a lot of stuff and I like a lot of things’. Her tweets are a jumbled mix of university complaints, TV show reactions and articles about social and political justice.
Everything would seem perfectly normal, if she didn’t have over fifty thousand followers. No doubt she’d only had a few hundred at most yesterday.
I’m half tempted to leave it for a bit.
No. No.
If I leave it now, I’ll leave it forever.
Bliss Lai @blisslai
It was you, wasn’t it? You told them. You saw Rowan’s name on my phone.
angel @jimmysangels
i swear to god it wasn’t me. i had absolutely no idea who you were. i’m so so sorry this has happened but i swear i did not know that you were rowan’s girlfriend.
After a minute or so, the little tick symbol shows up, meaning that she’s seen it. She’s read it.
She doesn’t reply after that. Fuck. What do I do? What do I do? I don’t want her to hate me. I don’t want her to think I would do this.
angel @jimmysangels
i promise this is the truth. if i’d known you were anything to do with the ark I would have been freaking out right in front of you. seriously. i’m just a normal fan, i would never do something as extreme as this.
Bliss Lai @blisslai
You underestimate the power of fans hahaha I know how extreme they can be What am I supposed to say to that?!
angel @jimmysangels
i don’t know what i can say to make you believe me Bliss Lai @blisslai
Neither do I
What am I supposed to say to that?
Bliss Lai @blisslai
I don’t know what to do
angel @jimmysangels
are you okay? are you somewhere safe, at least?
Bliss Lai @blisslai
Well not really, I’m at work. There are people with cameras waiting outside.
angel @jimmysangels
oh my god
Bliss Lai @blisslai
Yeah haha
angel @jimmysangels
can you get rowan to help you???
Bliss Lai @blisslai
Not really, him coming here would just make things worse. I don’t want to go out there alone. they’ll surround me.
angel @jimmysangels
could someone at work maybe leave with you?
Bliss Lai @blisslai
Not really … they just want me to make the photographers go away.
Oh God. I’m really about to do this, aren’t I?
angel @jimmysangels
do you … want me to come and find you?
Bliss Lai @blisslai
Fuck, would you??
angel @jimmysangels
if you needed someone, yeah. i don’t have anywhere to be today.
Bliss Lai @blisslai
It’s just to help me get out of the throng of paparazzi. You’re really tall so that should help haha angel @jimmysangels
i will warn you, i am weak. like no muscle. also scared very easily.
Bliss Lai @blisslai
Better than nothing though angel @jimmysangels
you say that now!
Bliss Lai @blisslai
You’re really gonna come here?
angel @jimmysangels
you really want me to?
Bliss Lai @blisslai
You’re not just doing this to try to meet The Ark, right?? Because you won’t meet them.
angel @jimmysangels
no!!! honestly, i just want to help!
Why do I want to help? Why am I doing this?
Bliss Lai @blisslai
Okay that’s good because otherwise I might have to live in HMV forever She works in an HMV? That’s not exactly what I expected from someone so confident and ambitious. How old is she anyway? She seemed five years older than me, but if she’s Rowan’s girlfriend, maybe she’s closer to my age.
angel @jimmysangels
okay well that sounds traumatic. send me the address and i’ll be there as soon as i can!!