Don't Kiss the Messenger (Edgelake High School, #1)(41)

“Now’s the fun part,” I said, and headed down the rocky path and stone steps to the dock. I walked out to the edge of the dock and pulled off my dress, tossing it next to my feet. Footsteps clamored down the pier behind me.

“CeCe, the water’s freezing,” Bryn said behind me. Obviously, she wasn’t from Northern Wisconsin. I grew up in water, splashing before I could crawl. When you are raised along the shores of Lake Superior, and spend every day looking out at a limitless body of water, you believe you can be as invincible. As powerful. As strong.

Tuba followed my lead and soon Emmett and Scott were peeling off clothes. Bryn followed suit and we all stripped down to our underwear.

I turned to the water and unclasped my bra and slipped it off. I pulled down my underwear and tossed it aside with my foot. I looked over the edge of the dock, into the inky black water. A cool wind passed against my skin and goose bumps rose up. I sucked in a deep breath and before I could hesitate, dove into the water. I let my body sink, just for a moment, inside the silent mouth of the lake. The freezing water gave me a painful, exhilarating jolt.

When I resurfaced, water splashed up next to me. I looked up and noticed Emmett was missing from the dock, and Bryn was giggling. A jolt of electricity ran up my back. He was naked, a few feet away from me. He swam up closer, next to me, and I instinctively kicked my feet under the water to make space. I felt his leg against the padding of my foot, warm and slippery.

Scott yanked off his boxer briefs and jumped in after us, and a naked Tuba cannon-balled behind him. But Bryn hesitated. Maybe she was pretending to be shy. Maybe she just wanted to make sure Emmett was looking. I had seen her around the locker rooms and showers enough to know she had no issues walking around naked. She seemed to prefer it over clothes.

“Peer pressure,” Emmett shouted over to her.

“It’s better than having to wear wet underwear,” Scott pointed out.

“It’s really the responsible thing to do,” I added.

Bryn slowly removed her bra, fastened at the front. She let it slowly slip down and the moonlight shown off the curve of her breasts, which she covered awkwardly in her hands. She wriggled her way out of her underwear and inched closer to the edge of the dock. Her ungraceful movements surprised me. I always assumed that darkness makes you strong and powerful. But for some people, it makes them fumble. Bryn needed the lights on in order to shine.

She jumped and screamed before her body hit the water. She surfaced in a coughing, bubbling giggle.

I started to swim away.

Tuba and Scott swam next to each other, whispering in the darkness. I looked over my shoulder and I could see Emmett and Bryn floating close together in the path of the moonlight. I realized it was time to give everyone space.

I passed the dock and kept going. I swam harder, kicking my legs and slamming my arms through the waves until some of the hurt and rejection melted away.

I floated on my back and looked up at the night sky. I was always drawn to the moon, ever since I was a kid, but the older I got, the more I appreciated it. It had scars. It had craters. But it was the shadows, the contrasts between light and dark that made it so mystifying. It’s beautiful, flawed surface gave me confidence that I could be seen the same way. I could be the moon.

I swam farther into the cold emptiness of the lake. My body rolled with the subtle rise and sink of the waves like breathing movements as if I was lying on the slippery chest of a giant.

By the time I swam back to the dock Scott was there, in his boxers. His impressive washboard abs glistened silver in the moonlight. He used his T-shirt to dry off his arms and legs. Tuba sat at the edge of the dock, fumbling with her bra strap.

I tried to brush the water off my skin. I wasn’t awkward or bashful. I’d been naked in front of guys before. This wasn’t the first time I had initiated skinny dipping.

I tugged my underpants over my damp skin and clasped my bra. Emmett and Bryn’s clothes were still lying on the dock. I looked out at the water, but I couldn’t see anything past the narrow trail of moonlight. I couldn’t hear them talking. I didn’t listen too closely—I didn’t want to hear what other noises they might be making.

Scott handed me his T-shirt and I thanked him, using it to wipe the cool droplets of water off my arms and legs. He threw his shirt over his shoulder and the three of us headed back toward the sidewalks and streetlights of the campus. When we passed the chemistry building, Scott waved good-bye.

“He’s cool,” I said to Tuba when he was out of earshot.

“Extremely cool. So is his girlfriend,” Tuba added. “That’s a direct quote from him.”

“That sucks,” I said and Tuba shrugged.

“It’s was still a great night,” she said. “I think Emmett had an excellent time.”

I watched our shadows stretch out along the sidewalk. I didn’t want to think about Emmett. But he was like my shadow, following me, attached to my thoughts.

“You act different around him,” she said. “Usually you close up around guys. But when you’re around him, you show off.”

This made me feel phony. I wasn’t trying to get attention around Emmett. I was just reacting to him. I couldn’t help that.

“I wasn’t showing off,” I said.

“I don’t mean it in a bad way. I mean, you stood out. You lit up.”

“I think you’re talking about the chemical reactions,” I said.