City Love(76)

So yeah. Jude’s on his way over. I am bursting to tell him these things. He’ll want to know what happened to the Darcy of fun summer flings and keeping the boys at a distance. I’ll have to find a way to explain that wasn’t the best solution.

The door buzzes. My heart jumps so high it nearly lifts me right off the floor. I’m secretly relieved that Sadie and Rosanna are out. They would not recognize me in my hyper boy-crazed state. I literally cannot wait to see Jude, so I run down to the front door to let him in. Buzzing him up and waiting for him to climb the stairs would be excruciating. The best part is that I didn’t even ask him to come over. Before I left his place early this morning for the almost-walk-of-shame home, Jude said he was going to come by tonight to pick me up. He said he had something special planned, and that this will be a night I will never forget.

I zoom down the stairs and zip to the front door. I whip it open.

But it’s not Jude.

It’s my ex.

My ex who dumped me like a bag of trash in some ghetto Dumpster. Like everything he’d said to me, all the promises he made, everything we’d been through, meant nothing.

“Logan,” I say. “What are you doing here?”

“I was wrong,” Logan says. “I should have never let you go.”

Oh.

My.

God.

How many times did I secretly hope Logan would show up at my door like this, saying these exact words? I must have pictured this scenario a thousand times my first few nights in New York. Lying in bed staring into the darkness, waiting for the light traffic noises of 5th Avenue to lull me to sleep, wishing that Logan would realize he made a mistake and come for me.

But Logan told me it was over right before I left for New York. That was the most painful type of breakup I can imagine: when you’re relying on your boyfriend during a big life transition and then—poof!—he’s gone. Actually that was my only breakup. Logan was my first love. He was the first boy to dump me. When he told me it was over, I began extricating him from my heart. Or so I thought. Seeing him standing in front of me now, every feeling I ever had for him crashes into me like a tidal wave.

My first love is right here. Standing on my stoop. Asking for a second chance. Exactly the way I’d hoped he would. Despite my best efforts to forget him and move on, deep down I never stopped hoping. And now he’s come all the way from California to get me back.

Logan puts his bag down. I try not to let his tall-lanky-dark-hair-and-eyes-sexy-sloucher thing affect me.

“We should be together, Darcy,” he says. “I want to be with you. I’ve always wanted to be with you. I just got scared. You were the first girl I’d ever been in love with. You opened my eyes to so much. Some of it I wasn’t ready to see. But I’m ready now.”

“You broke my heart.”

“You’ll never know how sorry I am. You were right about the long-distance thing. We would have been the exception. We would have made it work. We still can.”

“How are you realizing all this now? Why didn’t you know this two weeks ago?”

“That would have been easier, I know. I’m so sorry I hurt you. Guys are idiots. If you didn’t know that before, it should be obvious now.”

“So . . . what, you’re an idiot and you realize we belong together and I should take you back?”

“Pretty much.”

“And then what? We just pretend you never broke up with me?”


“No, of course not. We can talk about it as much as you want. I don’t expect to be forgiven overnight. Let me prove to you that you can trust me again.”

“That’s . . . I mean, you can’t just show up here and expect everything to go back to the way it was.”

“Why not?”

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Jude down the block. Coming for me.





THIRTY-SIX

ROSANNA


WHAT A DIFFERENCE A DAY makes when you have the right support system. I’d been feeling gross all day about Mica blowing up at me. How could she believe I said those things? I just couldn’t wrap my head around it. I still can’t. Talking to Sadie helped. When camp is back in session on Monday, I’ll call the Upper East location and get Addison’s number. I’ll find out what her problem is. Whatever is wrong, I’m sure we can find a solution that doesn’t involve Addison spewing lies about me. I’ll ask Addison to tell Mica that no part of what she said was true. Given how much she hates me, it won’t be easy to convince her to own up to her lies. But people shouldn’t act like monsters. If they do, they should be forced to face the consequences of their actions.

I’ve been told that my expectations of people are too high. The thing is, I don’t think expecting someone to treat other human beings with courtesy and respect is unreasonable. The world would be a much better place if everyone treated others with kindness. It astounds me that such a basic principle is beyond the scope of comprehension for anyone.

Sadie was also right about D. He was calling to ask me out. It’s true that I didn’t answer the phone when he called last night because I was afraid I would burst into tears. But I was also afraid of what he might say. D breaking up with me right after Mica did would have been too much. He deserves to be with someone more experienced who can give him what he wants. When we talked tonight, it was a huge relief that he was calling to see if I was okay and to ask if I wanted to see him. At first we couldn’t decide where we wanted to go, but then he called an hour later and told me to meet him at Otheroom. D said it’s one of his favorite bars. Very dark and romantic.