Wild Chance (Wild Irish Universe)(9)

“I didn’t want to taint what I found with you and your family,” Aedan said. “It may not make sense to you. But here, this place was my happiness. I was safe. I know it sounds like a cop out, but I wanted a place in my life where none of that would touch. Anyway, at eighteen, I could finally do what I wanted and one day I simply walked out of the house. I actually left to come here but found myself heading in the opposite direction and I just kept going.”

“We would have helped you, Cal. I would have helped you.”

“I know.” Aedan looked away. “Really, I knew that. But for some reason I was so ashamed and so happy with you guys. I know I shouldn’t have left you, Killian. I get that you were worried but in that time, I couldn’t think straight.”

“So, you joined the military.”

“The second they’d let me. I served for as long as I could until…” Aedan stopped speaking for he could tell his voice was about to break. Instead, he rolled up the leg of his left pant and showed Killian the prosthetic.

“Jesus, Cal.”

“I couldn’t run anymore after this happened.”

Killian rubbed his eyes and eased back into his chair. Aedan took that moment to put his pant leg back in place.

“Have you told Kiera, Tristan, the others?”

Aedan shook his head. “Not yet. Kiera has questions but she’s being patient.”

“And here I come like a damn truck. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. Right now, I’m just picking up the pieces, you know? I thought for sure I’d die over there. That I wouldn’t have to come back and deal with any of this. But, once again life proved exactly how wrong a guy could be.”

“You wanted to die on deployment?”

Aedan couldn’t meet his friend’s eyes. “That was then. I’m home now.”

“Aedan, I need to know if I should be worried.” Killian stressed.

“You think I’ll hurt myself?”

“I don’t know! Would you?”

Aedan shoved from the table but didn’t get very far before Killian caught his arm and tugged. He slammed into Killian’s chest and his friend’s arm tightened around him in a hug. For a second Aedan fought to get away. But, soon, he merely melted into Killian’s chest, his arms helpless at his side.

“I can’t believe you don’t know by now that you never have to hide who you are from me.” Killian’s voice was soft. “When did you stop believing in my friendship, Cal? When did we get so far away from each other that you would stop trusting me?”

Aedan broke then. His eyes burned terribly and all he could do was press them shut, praying the urge to cry would subside. “I never went into this thinking you’d feel that way. I’ve always trusted you and your family with everything I am—everything I’d ever be. If it hadn’t been for you guys, I wouldn’t still be here. It was never a matter of trust.”

“Then what was it?” Killian stepped back.

“Fear.”

Killian nodded, and they sat again. “We’re here, Cal. I’m here. I’ve always been here and will stay for as long as you need me. I’ll be here even when you think you don’t need me. I’m a Collins, Cal and our loyalty runs deeper than blood.”

“I’ll try remembering that.”

“No. The time for trying is over. Just do it.”

Aedan nodded.

“So,” Killian said as the two made their way over to the bar. “Kiera told me you were on a date last night? We’re moving a bit fast, aren’t we?”

“I didn’t plan on it. Hell, I didn’t think I deserved a woman, especially with my bum-leg. But the moment she walked in the doors, I couldn’t stop staring. There was just something about her. Then there she was offering to buy me a drink and asking her out was past my lips before I could stop it.”

“How was it?”

“Perfect.”

“Tell me about her.”

Aedan tilted his head while picking up the wrench. “Well.” He slipped down to the base of the tap and continued replacing a screw. “She’s gorgeous, educated, talented—a painter and a teacher. I could tell she loves her students. But what stunned me the most was that she’s interested in me. Leg and all.”

“Cal, you know the leg doesn’t make the man, right?”

“Easy for you to say. It’s been a year and a half, and I still feel like I’m lacking, like I’ll never be enough. Besides, if the leg doesn’t scare her away my—um—appetite definitely will.”

Killian walked around to sit on the floor beside him. “Just so I know we’re talking about the same thing. When you say appetite…”

“Sexually.” Aedan set the wrench down and poked at the screw then the metal beneath it. “It’s been a while for me—man, I can’t believe I’m telling you this.”

“In the vault.”

Aedan frowned. “You still friends with Justin?”

“Friends.” Killian rubbed the back of his neck. “Something like that.”

“Then the vault is leaky.”

“I’m not that bad, am I?”

“You tell Justin everything!” Aedan accused.