Warrior (First to Fight #1)(30)
I don’t know how it happens, but Olivia stays in my arms the whole time. I’d forgotten what it was like to be with a girl, not just a random girl who ends up in my barracks because I managed to sneak them back from the bar. But a girl I know, a girl I’ve grown up with and care about. She feels so damn good in my arms I don’t ever want to let her go.
Her body is plastered to my front and she hasn’t let go of my hands the entire time. A part of me knows that I should just walk away, should try to find the others and put some much-needed space between us, but I can’t.
I don’t want to.
When the last note of the final song rings out she turns in my arms and looks up at me. I’m frozen to the spot, my hands resting on her hips, people pushing past where we’re frozen in the crowd. Finally someone knocks into us and I wrap a protective arm around her shoulder and usher her out of the way.
We wind up at the base of the Ferris wheel, hidden in the shadows of two looming carnival games. The crowd spills on either side. Bright lights dance in the distance. For the first time in my life, I don’t have a goddamned thing to say. Sensing my hesitation, she raises her hands to my shoulders, her fingers slide up my neck and she pulls my head down to hers.
I crowd her against the particle board siding of the stand, unable to keep from touching her. She tastes like beer and the sugar from the funnel cake she’d snagged. I lick it up, tracing her lips with my tongue. She nips my bottom lip and I can’t help but grin against her mouth.
She arches her neck and I taste the skin at the curve of her shoulders. Her fingers flex against my chest and she trembles against me. Or maybe it’s me. I feel like I’m a f*cking virgin with her in my arms. I nip a line up her throat and my hand moves of its own accord to the exposed line of her stomach. Her skin is satin-soft and I feel her hum as my hand moves upwards. Hopefully she can’t feel them shake.
She urges me closer and I use my free hand to hitch her up against the wall as my lips find hers again. We groan in unison as her legs wrap around my waist. I can feel her heat through our clothes. I’ve never been so hard in my life.
My hand inches up the bared expanse of her skin. I trace the line of her bra with a finger and she does a full body shiver. “Touch me,” she says.
The sound of her throaty voice breaks through the haze of my arousal. Even though it hurts, literally hurts, I manage to put some distance between us.
She looks up at me, her lips puffy and red. “What’s wrong?”
“We should—we should head back.”
I take a step backwards, trying to regain control over myself.
What the f*ck was I thinking?
Livvie grabs my arm. “No, not until you tell me what’s wrong.”
“You’re not that girl, Livvie. I’m not about to f*ck you against the wall.” She blanches and I feel like an *. “I’m leaving again soon and you’re better than that.”
Her face falls, but she covers it up with a fake smile. “Right. I’m going to go…find Sofie.”
I watch her walk away, cursing myself for making that move…and for not following through on it.
Present Day
Maybe this is my second chance. As I watch them leave, I vow not to make the same mistake twice.
Later that afternoon, unable to stomach my parents’ house for another second, I head to Jack’s gym, almost hoping that he’s there. We hadn’t talked much since I got back, he’s probably pissed at me for sleeping with his sister. If I were him, I’d want to kill me, too.
Unfortunately, he’s not there when I shoulder my way through the front door. I pay for a day pass and a locker rental, hoping to pound out my frustration on the mats. The locker rooms are empty as I change into my gym clothes and turn off my hearing aide. It does come in handy when I want to check out of the world. The loss of sound helps center me…it isn’t always like that, though. Sometimes the silence can be deafening.
The doctors had advised against too much strenuous activity. But f*ck ‘em. I needed this.
A couple of guys were sparring on the mats. I joined them to wait my turn. When it came, I was paired up with a big motherf*cker. I bared my teeth at him as we started our round. He managed to work in a couple of powerful hits that jarred my ribs, but he stayed away from my face. I return with a right hook to his chin that pisses him off. It makes me smile and the weight in my stomach lessens.
Then he manages to land a glancing blow off of my ear and everything goes white. When I come to, I’m on the floor, looking up at the dirty ass ceiling and Jack’s ugly face is hovering above me.
He’s talking, but I can’t hear him over the ringing in my ear and the pounding behind my eyes is only making it worse. I wave a hand at him and manage to get back up to my knees. Blood drips from my ear onto the mat and my fingers come away smeared with it. Fucking great.
I get to my feet easy enough, growling at anyone that comes to try and help. Jack watches with narrowed eyes, his thunderous expression tells me that the time has come for us to have it out.
I stumble from the ring and head to the showers. Deciding that I’m not ready to talk after all, I do what I have become expertly good at over the last six months, avoid someone who used to be close to me. Close like a brother. He can f*cking follow me if he wants to have this conversation.
He looks at me as he talks and his expression says he would love nothing more than to beat my ass. I nearly smile at him because I could use a good dust up.