Upside Down(19)

“Absolutely. Friends is good too.”

I sighed. “It is. And I would be happy with him just as a friend. I’m not even kidding.” I took a second to internalise that, and I nodded to myself. “I’m actually really okay with that. To the point where I’m starting to wonder if that’s what I need right now. A friend, nothing more.”





Chapter Six





Hennessy





I was nervous. Probably more nervous than I should have been, and I tried to tell myself that I should treat this like any and all of my asexual support group meetings. But something felt different.

Jordan was different.

I’d spent most of the morning at work, which was a great distraction, and it allowed me to get a lot done. Except my mind was all over the place.

I couldn’t even believe I’d asked him for coffee. I had everything planned in my head for our brief encounter on the bus yesterday, but that all went to hell when the bus was full and that sweet little old lady asked if she could take the seat. There was no way I was saying no to her, but then Jordan got on the bus, all flustered and clearly disappointed that this new seat-saving thing we’d started had been thwarted.

And the idea of being robbed of my daily five-minute conversation with him just wasn’t going to fly, so I gave up my seat and squeezed through the crowd just for the chance of saying hello. I’d wondered what on earth had possessed me and had visions of it being a disaster, but then he’d looked up at me and smiled.

And I knew then I’d totally made the right decision.

But five minutes wasn’t enough. Not even close. I had the feeling that he and I could talk for hours. Okay, correction. I had the feeling that Jordan could talk for hours. But I also had the feeling that he’d be interesting and smart, and coupled with his sense of humour, it was refreshing.

So I asked him to meet me for coffee, which was why I sat in Alberto’s at ten to two, trying to not watch the clock and trying not to get my hopes up that he would even show.

It was cold outside, the wind was biting and blustery, but it didn’t stop the good people of Surry Hills from being out in it. They walked dogs and pushed prams, holding takeaway coffee cups as they went. Once a not-so-great suburb, Surry Hills was now the hub of trendy coffee houses, cool clothes, and eclectic homewares stores. I liked it here, and although the move had seemed rather daunting six months before, I knew I’d made the right decision. I’d found a home here. The baristas at Alberto’s called me by name. The lady in the fresh produce store always kept a bag of organic pumpkin pasta behind the counter for me because it sold out so fast. My neighbours were nice, not that I spoke to them much, but the move here had been a positive one.

Leaving Rob and being true to myself was the best thing I could have done.

And then there was my new support group meetings, which I was incredibly proud of. And then there was Jordan, and something sparked inside me. I didn’t know if it would lead to anything, but it was nice to feel that flicker of hope.

At exactly five to two, said flicker of hope walked up to the café door. Jordan, wearing blue jeans, a white sweater with a brown jacket, and boots. I was almost a little disappointed that he wasn’t wearing a bright scarf to match equally bright shoes, but he still looked great.

He put his hand on the door, let out a long breath, and pushed his way in. He scanned the coffee shop, so I stood up and he smiled when he saw me before walking over. “Hi,” he said, breathily.

“Let me order you a coffee,” I suggested. “You don’t have dairy, right?”

“Believe me,” he said. “Nobody wants me to have dairy.”

I laughed. “Duly noted.”

“Soy latte is fine, no sugar. Thank you.”

I went to the counter, ordered and paid, and the barista said she’d bring our coffees over. I went back to Jordan and smiled as I sat opposite him. “You found the place okay?”

He nodded. “I work not far from here.”

“Where is that exactly?” I asked. “I mean, we haven’t really even got that far in a conversation, have we?”

“Five minutes a day doesn’t leave time for much discussion, especially when I tend to talk a lot.”

I grinned at him. “You do. But there’s been no nervous rambling yet today.”

“Well, I’m not so nervous today. I mean, I was yesterday. After you got off the bus, I kind of had a freak-out so I called Merry and she talked me down.”

“She’s a good friend,” I prompted, hoping he’d say more but not wanting to push.

“She’s the best. She knows how to deal with me.”

“Which is…?”

“Well, that depends. She either tells me to pull my head out of my arse and stop being such a dick, or she talks me back from the ledge. It totally depends on what I need more, which she seems to know better than me. And I work at the library.”

I nodded slowly. “That would explain the knowledge of books.”

He smiled. “It would.”

“I’ve never been to the library here. I have no excuse. I’ve been here for six months.”

“You should come by one day,” he said, blushing a little. “I could show you around. It’s really so much more than just a library.”