Unbreakable (City Lights, #2)(109)

Vic had tried—vehemently and with much cursing in Spanish—to talk me out of it. “You don’t even fight for Alex?” he had demanded. “You let her marry someone else? And you go back to Georgia? Why?”

“Alex doesn’t know what she wants. But I can’t live there and have Callie live there, only to have Alex decide it’s all too much. I can’t do that to Callie. Pull the rug out from under her like that. That’s the bottom line.”

There was no arguing that. Vic had let me go.

Now, at the bottom of the cement staircase that led to Georgia’s place, I wished my friend had tried harder. I gripped the iron railing with its peeling paint, unable to take another step. You’ll be with Callie. Every day. Make this work and you might have some semblance of a real family.

I tried to imagine life in Alaska. My mind conjured a rustic house against a forest brushed with snow, winters that were bone cold, and nights that could last for months. And Alex…Alex would be hundreds of miles away, and it seemed as if all the warmth and fire in the world would be with her, leaving me cold and empty.

Was Vic right, and I didn’t fight hard enough? But damn, what was I supposed to do? Grab her and shake her and demand she love me? My pride wouldn’t stand for it and my heart couldn’t take it if the answer was no.

I swallowed the jagged lump in my throat and took the stairs, feeling is if lead weights hung from my feet.

Georgia answered the door, her eyes red-rimmed and her voice thick. “Hi.”

“Are you all right?” I stepped inside, alarmed. “How is Callie? Where—?”

Georgia flapped her hands, irritated. “She’s fine. I’m fine. We’re all fine. She’s sleeping so let’s keep it down, please. I don’t want to her to wake up.” She shivered at the idea. “You want something to drink? Tea? Or maybe a beer?”

I sat on the couch, warily watching her. “A beer, thanks.” It occurred to me that Georgia was not usually so solicitous unless she wanted something. I sighed. She could cut the act. She was about to get everything she wanted.

She returned from the kitchen with two cans of Heineken, and sat in the chair opposite the couch. She didn’t drink her beer, but set it down on the table with hands that trembled slightly. Her eyes darted to the wall clock.

“Aren’t you going out?” I asked.

“Not yet. I want to…talk first.”

“Good, yeah, me too.” I took a long pull on my beer and set it down. “I have something to tell you.”

Her glance darted to the clock again. “Okay.”

Once I spoke, there’d be no taking it back. No going back. Not to Los Angeles, not to Alex…I inhaled and let it out slowly.

“I wanted to tell you that I ditched the inspection. I won’t fight the move to Alaska. In fact, I’ll…move with you. I’ll mar…” The word stuck in my throat. “I’ll marry you, if that’s what you want. I want to make it work. For Callie. Whatever happens, I want to be able to say I did everything I could to make it right for all of us.”

Georgia stared at me, as if seeing me for the first time.

“I know, you’re probably shocked at the turnaround after I put you through the hearing…Anyway, I have to figure out something up there for Pops. Might take a little time to get him settled, but then I’ll be there and we can start again. Okay?”

Georgia stared at me for a good ten seconds more and then burst into tears. She buried her face in her hands, her long blonde hair curtaining down around her.

I frowned, confused. “What? Hey, it’s okay.”

Georgia lifted her tear-stained face, her voice tight and high. “What is wrong with me? What is wrong with me that I can’t love you? You’re a good man! Over and over again, the universe gives me chances to be as good as you, to love you. Like tonight. You’d give it all up to do what’s right, but instead of joy or relief I feel nothing.”

“I don’t understand…”

“What happened with that Alex woman? It didn’t work out? Is that why you’re here, pledging to marry me?” She barked a laugh and then lowered her voice that was full of tears. “You want a family so badly, you’re willing to do anything to get one. Even if it means being miserable with me.”

“Georgia. I’m just trying—”

“To do the right thing, yes, I know. That’s what you do. You build things and fix things, and you’re trying to fix us, but Cory, we cannot be fixed. We are broken beyond repair.”

She waved her hands in front of me to preclude me speaking further, and moved to sit beside me. She took my face in her hands, tears streaming down her face. I expected any number of things to come out of her mouth in that moment, an infinity of words and their infinite combinations.

But nothing could have prepared me for those she actually spoke.

“Whatever we are, whatever I am, I know I am not a terrible mother. I’m not. That’s why I’m going to do the best possible thing for our little girl.” She swallowed her tears and said, “I’m going to Alaska. Tonight. But not with you and…not with Callie.”

Time slowed to a halt as the words sunk in, like knives pressed slowly into my chest. Georgia’s hands slid off my face and I watched her, stunned, as she went to the window and lit a cigarette with shaking hands.