Unbreakable (City Lights, #2)(106)

God help me, what am I going to do?





Chapter Thirty-Eight


Alex

“What are you doing here?” Lilah Tran demanded. “On the floor? Who let you in? The complex is secure. Or it’s supposed to be.”

I looked up at her from the hallway floor of her condo complex where I’d been sitting for the last hour. It was Thursday evening and I hadn’t slept more than a handful of hours in three days. I had to talk to someone before I went crazy.

“You won’t return my calls,” I said, climbing to my feet, and wincing as tingles shot down the backs of my legs.

“There’s a reason for that,” Lilah said. She set her briefcase down so she could fish her keys from her purse.

“Are you really not going to talk to me?” I demanded, crossing my arms and trying to keep the quaver out of my voice. “Because that’s bullshit, Lilah. I’m sorry but it is. I’m your best friend.”

Lilah rounded on me, her eyes wide. “Are you f*cking kidding me? No, no, on second thought, come in. Please. I really want to hear from Alex Gardener how I’m the shitty friend. This is going to be good.”

I bit back a retort and followed Lilah into her condo. It was a bright, airy, two-story with high, angled ceilings, lots of natural light and Lilah had elegantly decorated in lots of beige, cream and lilac colors. She had purchased it when her divorce from her philandering husband was finalized, and I realized with a sweep of guilt, that I hadn’t been inside since the sparsely attended housewarming party.

“Oh, Lilah, you’re right. It’s me. I’m the shitty friend. I’m so sorry…”

Lilah put her hands on her hips. “You got all that just from walking in the door?”

“I haven’t been here since the party. Not once. To visit or hang out or just…spend time with you. I’ve just been so busy—” I held up a hand, cutting off my own excuses. “I should have been here for you, after the divorce, and I wasn’t and I’m so sorry.”

Lilah nodded warily. “Go ahead, sit. Do you want some wine?”

“Yes, thanks.” I sat on the white leather couch while Lilah went to the kitchen, which was open to the living area. “It really is a beautiful place, Li.”

Lilah returned with two glasses of cabernet, handed one to me, and kicked off her heels to tuck her legs under her. “I think it turned out rather well. It’s small-ish—to those who think thirteen hundred square feet is small—but I don’t need more. I could have gotten the house.” She smiled over her wine glass. “The lawyer my best friend recommended to me was pretty good.”

I smiled thinly. “Glad to hear Joe did his job.” I sipped my wine, fighting the urge to down it one gulp and ask for a refill. “So how are you?”

“Alex,” Lilah said, laughing lightly. “It’s okay, really. We can catch up on my single-life adventures some other time. But you…you’re having a crisis. Right?”

I nodded miserably. “I just don’t want to dig my hole any deeper.”

“Too late.” Lilah smiled and reached out to give my hand a brief squeeze. “Tell me.”

“I’m a little bit afraid of what you’re going to say given how you reacted to my last little revelation.”

Lilah sighed. “I’m sorry I freaked out. It’s a touchy subject for me, for obvious reasons. But I realize I need to separate my situation from yours. So tell me. Tell me everything and I promise not to judge.”

“I want you to judge,” I said. “Judge me, lecture me, tell me what the hell I’m doing because I…I’m just lost, Li.”

I told Lilah everything that had happened, up through the night of Cory’s birthday.

“It was…unbelievable,” I said, sighing. “It was everything I had been missing for so long. Cory’s the kindest, sweetest man, but turn him loose in the bedroom, and oh my god.” I cleared my throat. “Sorry, but it’s important. It was important to me to have that physical connection with a man. But after spending time with his father and his daughter, the baseball game…It was more than physical for him. He let me into his life as if he…he wants me in it.”

“Do you want to be in his life?” Lilah asked.

I swallowed another sip of wine. A large sip. “You haven’t heard the rest. Drew came over the next morning.”

Lilah’s eyebrows shot up. “Holy shit. Did he know?”

“Yeah, he did. Of course.” I sighed. “He knew. That’s why I didn’t tell anyone Cory was there. At first it was just because I knew what it looked like. Then after we slept together, it was what it looked like.”

“Was Drew very upset?” Lilah asked. “He must’ve been. And so the party is off? Is the wedding off?”

I shook my head ‘no’ to all of it. “He wasn’t upset like I expected he’d be, and that’s almost the worst part.” I told my friend Drew’s solution to handle our ‘little issue’, and was gratified that Lilah seemed just as appalled.

“An open marriage?”

“Open on my end,” I said. “He has no interest in me let alone another woman. Or women.”

“What did you tell him? You didn’t agree, did you?”