The Magnolia Chronicles: Adventures in Modern Dating(39)

Magnolia: Lawns waste upwards of 3 trillion gallons of water each year plus hundreds of millions of gallons of gas for mowing and pesticides. Those pesticides then destroy aquatic ecosystems with toxic rainwater runoff.

Magnolia: Lawns also drive out pollinators and native animal and plant species.

Ben: Okay. I won't mow your moss.

Magnolia: Thank you.

Magnolia: And thank you for offering.

Ben: Let's not give me too much credit.





*



Rob: Sox game tonight. At Fenway.

Magnolia: Yes, sir.

Rob: Got a date?

Magnolia: lol, always…because I share a set of season tickets with my brothers.

Rob: Ah. All right. Enjoy.

Rob: …but if you want to stay overnight in the city, hit me up.

Magnolia: Do you have room for Linden too? He's about your height but probably has 30-40 pounds on you.

Rob: I will get Linden a very comfortable suite at the Taj.

Magnolia: I think we're good but I'll keep you posted.





*



Ben: I brought your recycling bins in from the curb.

Ben: After they were emptied.

Magnolia: Thank you—and good clarification.

Ben: It's the least I can do without fucking up your moss.

Magnolia: I appreciate it.

Ben: Your dog, though. He didn't like me hanging around your yard.

Magnolia: For what it's worth, he barks at my brothers that way too when they visit. Anyone outside the house is the enemy.

Ben: Smart boy.





*



Ben: Explain to me again why we can't work on one room at a time.

Magnolia: Because you ripped the walls and floors and windows out and we have to fix those things first.

Magnolia: You can't spend your time on finding cool shower fixtures until you have walls. You need walls.

Ben: You're saying I should stop buying stuff.

Magnolia: Among other things, yes.

Ben: Can you tell me what else you're saying because I don't know how to read between the home renovation lines.

Magnolia: You need to figure out what you're doing with this place. Once you determine whether you're renovating the entire place to sell or renovating it for you to live in or selling it as-is right now, other questions will answer themselves.

Ben: I'm not ready to sell it. I don't know. I just can't be finished with it yet.

Magnolia: I get that.

Ben: No. It doesn't make sense.

Ben: But I should sell it. I don't want a house in Beverly, of all places.

Magnolia: HEY

Ben: Sorry.

Ben: But I don't want a house. I don't want the responsibility.

Magnolia: And you don't want to sell it.

Ben: Not yet.

Magnolia: In that case, you shouldn't buy any more shower fixtures.

Magnolia: Any fixtures. At all.

Ben: I just don't know when I'll snap out of this. I need to get on with my life.

Magnolia: I think you have to take it as it comes and do your best. It's not the sort of thing you can rush.

Ben: I'm trying.

Magnolia: I know, sweetie.

Magnolia: Do you want to talk about it? You can tell me about your grandmother.

Ben: No.

Magnolia: Okay.





*



Rob: Here's how fucked up my day has been.

Rob: I had a call at midnight with Osaka and then a 4 a.m. call with Brussels and sometimes I hate that I'm good at my job because my job is exhausting.

Magnolia: That is more fucked up than my day.

Rob: What's going on with you?

Magnolia: Nothing important. Just issues with subcontractors and materials and timelines and budgets and also weather.

Rob: Yeah, so, nothing much.

Magnolia: Nope.

Rob: Have you eaten lunch?

Magnolia: Lunch? What is this lunch you speak of?

Rob: Where are you?

Magnolia: Back Bay. Why?

Rob: I'm sending lunch over to you.

Magnolia: You don't have to do that.

Rob: I want to.

Rob: Mortadella and raspberry seltzer, right?

Magnolia: Only if you're having cookies with a side of smoked turkey.

Rob: Give me an address.

Magnolia: Are you delivering this lunch yourself?

Rob: That depends. Do you want to see me?

Magnolia: I wouldn't send you and your cookies away.

Rob: That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.

Magnolia: It's the first time you've offered to hand-carry lunch to me.

Rob: We can make a habit of this.

Magnolia: Let's see how this one goes before making any rituals.

Rob: Come on! You know how it will go. We'll eat cookies and I'll invite my cock into the conversation and your day will be better for it.

Rob: Also, I want to watch you boss people around.

Magnolia: Is that so?

Rob: Yeah. I need to add some texture and dimension to my fantasies.

Magnolia: Since it's for a good cause…the brownstone at the end of Fairfield between Beacon and Marlborough Streets.





Chapter Nineteen





My date was a renovation disaster.

I didn't know where to find the patience to keep up with Ben's missteps. When he fouled up the mitered angles on the molding I tasked him with cutting, I stopped to contemplate whether he was doing it on purpose. He had to be doing it on purpose. How else could someone fuck up on the regular like this?