The Magnolia Chronicles: Adventures in Modern Dating(38)

"And you get to watch me smirk at my screen because you've parked yourself at my desk and forgotten you have a desk of your own."

Patrick arched his brows up, shrugging as he bit into the donut. "And?"

"And you have all day, every day to love on each other whereas I've tripped into a universe where I'm somehow seeing two guys," I said, reaching for a paper napkin. I balled it up and reached for another. "Two of them. Two separate men. At once. How did I get two? Really, all I need is one. Just one."

"You had the opportunity to eliminate one of them," Patrick said.

"This isn't the proper spot for an elimination ceremony," I replied. "Additionally, my life is not a reality dating show."

"You don't want to eliminate either of them," Andy said. "I remember when Rob first matched with you on that app. You were hooked on him. Then you yelled at the cute firefighter that one night and you were hooked on him too. You don't want to eliminate either."

"I beg your pardon," Patrick said, shifting on the bench seat to face her. "Which cute firefighter?"

"I'm married." Andy wiggled her snowball-sized ring at him. "Not dead. There is a difference." Patrick grumbled something under his breath and went back to his donut. "And you, my dear," she said, pointing her iced tea at me. "You deserve this, Gigi. You've kissed all the frogs. Some toads too. Now you get your choice of, you know, non-amphibious creatures."

She was right about the frogs. And the toads. I'd given too many days to men who cared little for me. I'd settled for nothing and convinced myself it was everything. I'd smiled through the warning signs and turned a blind eye to unacceptable behavior. I'd excused the inexcusable—lies, cheating, even stealing—and told myself it was as good as I was going to get.

I'd made bad choices, and I'd allowed myself to stay in bad situations. It took a kidnapped dog and one hell of a talking-to from one of my very best friends—and then a relapse with another no-good man and another Come to Jesus talking-to—but I knew how to spot douchebags and fuckboys and assholes now. And I knew I deserved more than that.

It was a strange thing, being okay with myself. I was still getting used to it. Most days, I wasn't used to the fit and feel while others forgot I was wearing it at all.

"While you're thinking deep thoughts, I'm going to eat the last donut," Andy said.

"Are you going to share it with me?" Patrick asked. "I'd like you to share it with me."

Andy met his gaze and bit into the donut. "Only because you're cute," she said, handing the pastry to him.

Rather than watching them eyefuck each other over the food, I turned to my phone.



Ben: There's a cool place in Revere Beach. Hasn't been hit by hurricanes or hipsters. Good beer, good food. I think you'd dig it. Let's go. Tonight.

Rob: I just called Talulla and asked them to hold a table for two at eight. I've heard the peach upside-down cake is crazy good. Does that time work for you?

Ben: Or I can pick up food and swing by your place. I'm good for a chill night on the deck if you are.

Rob: If you're not up for dinner out, we can do takeout. What's your preference?

Ben: Your choice, babe.

Rob: I'm down for anything you want.





In the spirit of full transparency and a strong desire to avoid jealous man tantrums, I started a group message with Rob and Ben.



Magnolia: Hey guys. I'm going to the game at Fenway with my brothers tonight. Some other time. Okay?

Ben: Enjoy it. Talk soon.





Of course, he responded first. Such a competitive little shit.



Rob: If it goes into extra innings and you want to crash in the city, you're always welcome at my place.

Ben: FLAG ON THE PLAY

Ben: PASS INTERFERENCE

Ben: Get your ass back to the line of scrimmage, boy.

Rob: Settle down. The pass is good. No interference.

Magnolia: You guys. For real. Chill.

Rob: As I'm sure you can see, I'm completely chill.

Ben: You wouldn't know chill if you were literally frozen.

Magnolia: If you two weren't amusing, you'd be annoying as fuck.





I slipped my phone into my bag as a smile pulled at my lips. Andy was right. I was hooked on these two.





Chapter Eighteen





Ben: I'm going to mow your lawn.

Magnolia: Is that some kind of innuendo?

Ben: No. I'm mowing your lawn.

Magnolia: With…a lawn mower?

Ben: Yeah.

Magnolia: I'm sorry but do you know how to operate a lawn mower?

Ben: Of fucking course.

Magnolia: I want to believe that so much.

Ben: It's going to be awesome. Just you wait.

Magnolia: Or maybe you find a different project?

Ben: It's no sweat.

Magnolia: Mmhmm. Okay. But it's not actually a lawn so it doesn't require mowing.

Ben: What the fuck is it?

Magnolia: Evergreen moss with patches of low-growing turf grass.

Ben: Why?

Magnolia: There are several reasons.

Ben: Such as…?