THE TROUBLE WITH PAPER PLANES(72)

“No one’s ever said that to me,” she whispered. “Not that I remember, anyway.”

I ached for her. My body, my heart, my soul – every part of me.

“I look in the mirror, and all I see is a face,” she said quietly. “Eyes, skin, hair. Fragments of someone else – bits and pieces that don’t really add up to anything. I don’t even know who ‘me’ is. But when you look at me, it’s different. I don’t know why, and I don’t care, but it just is. You don’t just see me, you look inside me. You make me feel whole.”

I gently took her face in my hands, making sure her eyes were on me, leaving no room for misunderstanding. “You make me feel whole, too.”

She closed her eyes, as if she was giving herself to me, and I took her. I took her lips in mine, her heart in mine, her soul in mine. I wanted all of her and it felt like we were in total agreement.

Breathlessly, I pulled away. I smiled, rocking slightly with her in my arms.

“I don’t know about you, but I need to cool off.”

She nodded, any residual sadness now gone, replaced by a cheeky smile that made me want to kiss her again. I resisted though, pulling my t-shirt off and running straight for the river, knees tucked up, maximum splash for your buck. I popped up, shaking my head like a dog and sending water spraying everywhere. At this point in the river, it was less than ten metres wide. Narrow and intimate, with the bank rising up steeply behind us, covered in native bush, the water refreshingly cool. It was like a private pool, and we had it all to ourselves.

“What are you waiting for?” I asked, staying submerged up to my shoulders, my toes digging into the sandy bottom. “Let’s make you some memories.”

She gave me a strange look, as if she wanted to cry, but then she smiled instead. She pulled her t-shirt off and unfastened her shorts. It felt like the clocks had stopped. Her shorts fell to the ground and she stepped out of them, her legs long and smooth and milky white. She had to be around five foot six, the same height as Em. I tried to mentally calculate how many inches of legs that would be, wrapped around me. That red swimsuit was devastatingly hot on her small frame. I’d always been a bikini fan but on her, that sexy one-piece was enough to change my mind.

She ran to the water’s edge and dived in, leaving a small splash in her wake. I watched her through the clear water as she swam towards me, popping up near me with a gasp.

“It’s freezing!”

I chuckled. “Yeah, it’s a bit glacial, I’ll give you that.”

She ran her hand over her hair, smoothing it back into her ponytail. I stepped closer, draping my arms around her. I couldn’t keep my hands off her. The need inside of me was growing, gnawing at me like an itch I couldn’t scratch. The more I ignored it, the worse it got. I knew I’d have to feed it soon, but in the meantime, as long as she let me touch her, hold her and kiss her, it was making it easier.

She smiled up at me, and for the first time, I saw the need growing inside her, too. She didn’t look shy anymore. She was challenging me.

Dangerous. Very dangerous.

I pulled her closer and her breasts rubbed up against my chest. My body felt like it was on fire. That red swimsuit was like an open flame, luring me closer. She laced her hands around my neck and I boosted her up as her legs encircled my waist, locking together behind me.

Sweet Jesus. She had no idea how difficult it was for me not to rip that swimsuit off her and take her, right then and there. Instead, I tilted my face up to hers and her smile disappeared, replaced by a ferocious longing. She leaned down, tickling the end of my nose with hers, and then she kissed me, her fingertips caressing the base of my neck and working their way up into my hair.

I was suddenly aware of nerve-endings I didn’t know I had. My heart felt like it was going to jump out of my chest, hammering against my ribcage, begging to be set free. We were standing in the middle of a cool river, water flowing gently around us, accepting us as one of its own, yet my body was on fire. The contrast was both irony and torture.

She released me, from her lips and from her spell.

“I don’t ever want this day to end,” she murmured, as her legs tightened around my waist. “I want to stay with you forever. I don’t care if forever is a month from now, a year from now, or a hundred years from now.”

Just the thought of forever being only a month from now made my gut clench. I wanted our forever to last a hell of a lot longer than that.

“If our forever lasts a hundred years, it’s not gonna be nearly long enough,” I said, pulling her closer.