Rushing the Goal (Assassins #8)(158)

“You don’t know that.”

“No, I f*cking do,” he stressed, feeling like he was already losing it. “Do you hear my voice, Lucy? I’m dying here. I miss you. I miss Angie. I want to be with my family.” That was when a sob left her lips and her soft cries filled the line. Closing his eyes, his heart just shattering in his chest, he whispered, “Lucy, baby, please, tell me what to do here.”

“Stay home,” she cried. “Just stay there. I’ll see you in a few days.”

And then the line went dead.

“Fuck!” he screamed, his ears rattling as he covered his face with his hands. Should he just fly down there? But he didn’t even know where Jace lived. “Fuck.”

Letting his head fall back, he swallowed hard and picked his phone up once more. “Bro, tell me you know what’s wrong with your sister?”

Jayden paused. “Um. No? I thought you guys were leaving for Florida?”

“She left without me.”

“What? What happened?”

“I don’t f*cking know. She says she needs time.”

“For what?”

“I don’t know, Jayden! Have you not heard anything? Your family is one big grapevine.”

Jayden’s voice was full of worry as he said to Baylor, “Mom tell you anything about Lucy?”

“No, what’s wrong?”

“I have no clue,” he said into the phone. “Let me call my mom.”

“No, I will,” Benji said and he hung up, dialing Autumn’s number. It was late, but thankfully, she answered. “Have you talked to Lucy?”

“No? Why? Is she okay? Are you guys engaged?”

He f*cking wished. “No, Autumn, she left for Florida—without me. Claiming she needs time. I don’t know what is going on.”

“What in the world? No. I don’t know anything. Let me call her.”

“No,” he said quickly. That wasn’t what he wanted. “She’ll get pissed that I called you. I just was hoping maybe you knew something.”

“No, sweetheart, I don’t, but I’m still calling her,” she said and then the line went dead.

“Fuck!”

Dropping his phone to the island, he let out a long breath as he rubbed his eyes, asking God what the hell he should do. This made no sense. It didn’t seem right, and he couldn’t even think of what he had done. He had been gone, so he knew that he didn’t leave the toilet seat up or use her toothpaste. He had only talked to her, and he had been checking that whore Nikky Jiggler’s site, and nothing. What in the world could be going on?

When he opened his eyes, he looked down, thinking maybe he could get Jace’s number from Jayden and call him, but something caught his eye. The paperwork from court with Mark Sinclair’s business card stapled to the top.

Could this have to do with Rick?

Turning the folder so he could see the number, he dialed Mark’s number, but he didn’t answer. Setting his phone down, he figured he’d try again tomorrow since it was almost midnight. He needed to go to bed. This had been his roughest Assassins road trip to date. He was aching everywhere from the hard-fought games against the Bruins, Islanders, Devils, and Rangers. They had won two of the four, but he was exhausted. Plus, he was worried, feeling like everything was just falling apart. He knew sleep wouldn’t come easy.

When his phone sounded, he looked down to see a text from Lucy.

Lucy: I’m going to kill you for calling my mom.

Benji: I’m desperate. Talk to me.

Lucy: I can’t. Not yet.

Benji: What the hell does that even mean?

He waited, but nothing came. Not even a little text bubble that signaled she was writing him back.

Nothing.

Complete silence.

The only sound he could hear was his heart breaking.





Benji didn’t fall asleep until six a.m. He had watched his phone until it died and then as it charged, until he finally fell asleep. He felt pathetic, but he couldn’t help it. He felt like he was losing everything with no clue as to why. He was pissed. So damn pissed at Lucy for doing this. He didn’t understand what she was holding back. What she was hiding and why? Didn’t she understand that he loved her unconditionally and he was going to support her no matter what?

What in the world had her running like this? Hiding?

The only thing he could come up with was f*cking Rick.

Rick had done something, and it was taking everything out of Benji not to find that bastard and kill him. He considered driving to his house, but then he didn’t know where the * lived. He also didn’t have his number, so he was stuck. As he stared up at the spinning ceiling fan, he couldn’t take the coldness that he felt. The way the house felt empty without them. How he had no clue what the hell to do. He was a fixer, he was a doer, but at that moment, he felt like a loser. With no clue how to rectify that.

As much as he wanted to believe she would come home and they would be okay, he knew they wouldn’t. Not after all this. No, she wanted to break up with him. She just couldn’t do it. While that should have pleased him, it just broke him more.

What in the world had he done? Or what had happened to make her want to leave him? To take away her love and Angie’s? It was unfair, and in a way, he was convinced it was f*cking payback for Ava and Leary. It had to be. Why else would he feel like this? Feel like he wanted to down a whole bottle of vodka and just die. Never in his twelve years of sobriety had he truly wanted a drink, but he could use one now.