Rooted (Pagano Family #3)(75)
Andi patted Carmen’s shoulder. “C’mon. Let’s go back and eat.”
They sat at the little round table in the back room and chatted while they ate, three women of an age, all with widely different backgrounds and personalities, but friends nonetheless. What they shared was respect and an openness of mind. Of the three, Carmen knew that she was the least giving of herself, the least open, the least…just, in general, the least. But they loved her anyway.
Their conversation, led by the gregarious Andi, was mainly about babies—Sabina’s preparation for the little boy they were adopting, who could come any time in the next couple of weeks, and Carmen’s impending motherhood, too, for which she had not prepared at all. She wasn’t in denial about the coming of her daughter, but she was, as yet, completely incapable of planning for the changes Teresa would bring her. Carmen needed to know what was right. No matter what it was, even if it hurt, she could do the right thing, as long as she could see it. But she didn’t know which choices were the right ones for Teresa, and not knowing had paralyzed her.
She was afraid, and she was hiding. She hated Theo for seeing that and throwing it in her face.
And she hated him for giving her an ultimatum. But at least ultimatums made for easy choices.
While they were nibbling at their chocolate silk pie, and discussing Trey’s enthusiasm for finally having other children in the family, Andi excused herself and went back to the storage room. Carmen watched her go, then turned to Sabina.
“What’s that about?”
Sabina shrugged and swallowed her dainty bite of meringue. “I don’t know. I will guess that she has a gift for you. She’s been excited about this lunch since she made the plan.”
Carmen put her hand over the stones at her throat. “She already gave me something.”
“It’s lovely. She feels strongly about her stones, yes? She asked me many questions when she was selecting them.”
“About me? Like what?” Carmen felt suddenly a little paranoid. She got enough of people talking about her behind her back in her family. She didn’t need it happening beyond that.
Sabina smiled and patted her hand. “Not prying questions, I think. I wouldn’t answer questions that pried.” She hesitated, and Carmen could see a question coming. “But I would like to ask, for myself—or maybe to say would be better—I would like to say that I’m here, to talk or to be with you, if you need that.”
Carmen’s eyes pricked again. Shit. She blinked and cleared away the urge to cry again. Sabina was the only one in her family who hadn’t spent the past week or so, since she’d gotten home from Maine, looking at her like she was some disappointing child. Carlo had even had the gall to say it was ‘typical’ of her to blow up a relationship. Asshole.
Well, Manny was okay with her, too. But Manny never got involved in family drama. She didn’t care how other people lived their lives, and she didn’t make judgments as long as she wasn’t directly affected. It was one of the ways her oddities made her great, in Carmen’s eyes. It easily balanced out her tendency to say what was on her mind, unfiltered by politeness or compassion.
“Thank you, Sabina. But I’m okay.”
Sabina didn’t seem convinced, but she nodded and didn’t push.
Andi came out of the storage room then with a flourish. “Ta-da!” She held two large, hand-woven Moses baskets, one in each hand. One was filled with pink, lavender, and yellow, and the other with blue, sage green, and pale orange. Each basket had a big, matching bow around the handles. “Forgive me for cleaving to gender stereotypes, but I just love little girls in pink and purple! Like little sherbets!” She brought the baskets to the table. Sabina pushed their plates of pie away, and Andi handed the pink basket to Carmen and the blue to Sabina. “I know you didn’t want a shower, Sabina, but I thought a little something like this would be okay.”
They went through their baskets. Blankets, booties, caps, onesies, a baby sling, stuffed bears—all of it hand-knitted, -crocheted, or -woven, and all of it gorgeous.
“My God, Andi,” Carmen said as she repacked her baby bonanza. “This is amazing.” She felt the knot in her throat, which lately never seemed to leave, tighten again, but she managed to hold back her tears this time. “Thank you.”
“Yes, Andi. So beautiful.” Sabina looked as stunned as Carmen felt. She had only recently begun to prepare for her baby’s arrival, and only because Carlo had started without her. Sabina still feared that the adoption would fall apart. But Carmen watched her rub over her cheek a soft blanket knitted from green and blue angora, her eyes closed, and could feel in her own heart the love Sabina already bore that little boy.
That thought made her tear up again. She swiped at her eyes. “Jesus, I hate hormones.” She took a breath and smiled at her friend. “Please tell me you didn’t also weave the baskets. Because that would just be annoyingly perfect.”
Andi laughed, a gentle, happy sound. “Oh, no. A friend made those. I know lots of artsy people.” With her hand on her hip, she sent Carmen a stern look. “And you are not getting out of having a baby shower, missy. This is just a preview. After the holidays, you are getting a bash. I can’t have you both cheat me out of organizing goofy games.”
Carmen shook her head. There was no way a baby shower was going to happen, but she’d let her friend have the fantasy for a while.