One Day Soon (One Day Soon, #1)(99)

And for that tiny bottle of shampoo and dirty bar of soap. Necessities that had become treasures in my throwaway life.

There was a knock on the bathroom door and I heard Yoss calling my name.

“Imogen. Are you okay? What’s wrong?” I felt him pull me into his arms and I sobbed harder.

“I know, baby, I know,” he crooned in my ear. “I know.”

“There’s soap,” I sniffled when I could speak. “And shampoo and towels.” I sat back and wiped my cheeks with the back of my hand. “I’m sitting here happy because I get to sleep in a bed and Bug is dead. What is wrong with me? What sort of person thinks like that?” I was close to hysterics. My brain was short-circuiting.

“It’s okay, Imi. There’s nothing wrong with you.” He kissed my cheeks. My nose. My quivering lips. He took my hands and held them to his mouth. “We will cry for Bug. We will grieve. And we will be warm and comfortable and happy that for tonight we’re safe. We’ll do that together.”

The tears fell harder and faster. I couldn’t stop them. All of the ugly, all of the horror came rushing over me and it was too much.

Yoss turned on the shower, the hot steam filling the bathroom. “You’ll feel better once you’re clean,” he murmured. “Do you need me to help you?”

I shook my head. I needed a few moments to myself. To try to get myself together.

“Okay, I’ll be right out here if you need me.” Yoss kissed me again and quietly left the bathroom.

It took me several tries to get my clothes off. My jeans were stiff from dirt and my T-shirt ripped as I pulled it over my head. I stood in front of the mirror in my bra and underwear. My ribs stood out beneath my stretched, pale skin. Any curves I used to have were long gone. Lost with the weight I had shed due to lack of food and constant stress.

I barely knew the girl that stared back at me. She was a far cry from the young woman who left her mother’s house all those months ago.

She was older.

She had seen things she would never unsee.

Her eyes were lost.

I grabbed the soap, shampoo, and disposable razor on the sink and got in the shower, the tears falling again at the feel of the warm water on my back.

I let the hot spray wash away more than the dirt. Something had to change. This life wasn’t the one I wanted for Yoss and me.

I thought about Bug and the future he’d never have.

But Yoss and I would be different.

We had to be.

There was a new story that we needed to tell.

Because our love needed a happy ending.





Present

Yoss slept for hours after we got back to my house. I cleaned up a little and put Yoss’s clothes in the washing machine. I carefully went through each item and was glad to see that a lot of them looked okay. The jeans were in fairly good shape and the flannels and sweatshirts, while stained, were in one piece.

There wasn’t a lot of clothing and I was able to get everything in one load.

After that I straightened up the living room as much as I was able to. I looked around at all the clutter and knew I needed to do something about my hoarding. Maybe it was time to get rid of a few things.

I knew why I held onto everything, but that didn’t mean I should.

At the end of the day, they were only things. It didn’t make my life any less empty. It didn’t fill the void that only one person could fill.

I boxed up a bunch of knickknacks and put them by the front door. I had a mild panic attack as I started clearing off my windowsills and end tables, but when I was finished it looked a lot better.

As I waited for Yoss’s clothes to finish in the wash, I decided to turn on a movie. Twenty minutes into Bedknobs and Broomsticks, I was passed out on the couch.

It was dark when I woke up and I realized I was no longer alone. I sat up, wiping my eyes. Yoss was watching A Street Car Named Desire, his legs stretched out in front of him.

“How long was I asleep?” I asked groggily, turning on the lamp behind me.

“I’ve already watched The Black Cauldron, Labyrinth, and now I’m halfway through this one. So I’d say five hours or so. I guess you needed the rest.” Yoss paused the movie and put the remote on the coffee table.

“I feel totally out of it,” I grumbled, trying to smooth out my hair and running my tongue over my teeth, which were feeling fuzzy. “You should have woken me up.” I looked at the clock on my phone and saw that it was past seven. “Are you hungry? I should make dinner. I was thinking chicken and rice.”

“I’m fine. I’m not hungry at all. It’s been nice sitting here watching movies while you slept. Feels sort of normal,” he chuckled, scratching the back of his neck. “I forgot how much you snore though.”

I glared at him. “I do not snore.”

Yoss smirked. “I’ll never tell.”

“You seem better. Are you feeling alright?” I asked him.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I told you it was just too much pizza,” he responded shortly.

“Did you take your medicine?” I was nagging him. But I wouldn’t stop worrying about him.

“You don’t need to watch over me, Imogen. I’m a big boy.” Yoss sounded slightly annoyed, but gave me a small smile.

“Crap. I need to put your clothes in the dryer.” I jumped up and hurried to the laundry room, quickly shoving Yoss’s clothes into the dryer and turning it on. When I returned to the living room, Yoss had turned on a few more lights and the television was off.