My Summer in London (My Summer #1)(41)
My rebuff wasn’t taken lightly. In fact, he seemed about to lose his cool composure. Even still, I remained where I was, not willing to go to him just because he had barked out an order.
“If you keep fighting me off, I might be tempted to spread you on my desk and f*uk you until you’re out of excuses to keep me at bay. It’s purely up to you.”
His straight-faced expression made me think of imminent danger, even though I knew Cruz would never hurt a hair on my head. He still had that kind of pull, that kind of power to make me feel debased and defenseless.
“Fine,” I said, conceding to his demand. It was silly, yet this wasn’t about the simplicity of his request, or command, rather. This was about control and who had the upper hand in this non-relationship.
My heart pitter-pattered inside my ribcage as I took the steps towards him, closing the gap between us. The second we were within arm’s reach, I could instantaneously feel the magnetic charge between our bodies. It was disconcerting and mind-blowing, and for the life of me, no matter how I tried to squash and kill how my body responded to him, I was unsuccessful. My nipples hurt as if they knew he was close and they sorely missed his touch. If I had any sense left, I would leave his office S.T.A.T. I could smell disaster waiting to happen.
“Are you done checking me out?” I snapped at him since he was taking his sweet time looking at me and thinking God knew what.
“Not in the slightest.”
Seriously? I needed to get out of there.
Just as I was thinking of him, I saw him from the corner of my eye pulling something out of his pocket before handing it to me. It was a black credit card with my name on it.
Well. What. The. Flying. f*ukery?
“What the f*uk is this for?” I shrieked, almost throwing the card back at him, offended beyond comprehension.
If he had a clue about what was going through my mind, he had best pay heed. However, it seemed he was dense when it came to women’s feelings because he didn’t seem to understand what my about-to-lose-it face meant.
“I need you to have a new work wardrobe consisting of skirts and dresses. You’re banned from wearing trousers.”
Well, I’ll be damned.
“Excuse me? Banned, you say?” My eyes turned into slits as I tried to contain the combustible emotions threatening to explode out of my chest. “That’s shitty and sexist of you!”
My outcry didn’t seem to surprise him, nor did he look fazed.
“I want to f*uk you without having to deal with such trivial matters.”
For the very first time today, there was a spark of amusement lighting his handsome face. I would have been responsive had this conversation not taken place, but that wasn’t the case. Instead, he and I were at each other’s throats once more. Unfortunately.
Dismissing the wry expression on his face, I denied myself the pleasure of slapping him and opted for dramatics by growling like an incensed animal and stomping towards his desk then throwing the damned thing in the trash before giving him a deadly glare.
“In case you missed it, Cruz Elliot, I didn’t sign up to be your personal hooker. Get that into your f*uking head, or I’m out of here!”
“I never said you were.” He frowned before approaching me with a concerned look. “My apologies for offending you. That was never my intention, Serena.” There was authenticity in his admission. “All I ever wanted to do was to show you just how greatly you affect me … in more ways than you can imagine. I want you tremendously without question, without logic. I am terrifyingly enamored by you.”
My eyes drifted to his lips before reaching his gaze once more. For the first time in my life, I was scared shitless of the unknown and what Cruz represented in my life.
“It’s just too soon …” I argued, grasping at straws. “People are going to see me as a home wrecker: your mom, Archer, everyone in the house. I can’t … I won’t be able to live with myself, Cruz.
“I know this might not make any sense to you, but this is very important to me. Whatever this is we have, if we work at it together, we can successfully make it disappear. Maybe we could even become friends. All this tension is just the cause and effect of being teased with the forbidden. And once the novelty wears off, it’ll be just like the rest—normal and pretty boring.”
He drew his face closer, looking into my eyes, our noses almost touching, needing to see through my lies, through the windows of my soul. “Don’t ever feed me lies. Your eyes tell me too much.”
“What we have is sex—amazing sex, but that’s all we share.” I licked my lips, wondering how I would deliver my next words without giving too much away. “If you’re willing, we don’t have to stop that aspect if we could do it as discreetly as possible, but that’s all I want from you.”
He probed my eyes, searching. “Do you genuinely mean that?”
I nodded and whispered, “Yes.” For the most part, I did.
His intensity didn’t waver as his eyes flickered back and forth, as if trying to read me. “Will you be exclusively mine?” He obviously wasn’t assured.
“I guess …” I trailed off, all the while pondering why he had to even ask me that.
His lips pressed together, unimpressed with my answer. “You guess, but you’re not quite sure.”