My Summer in London (My Summer #1)(27)

He was roughly heaving, looking devastated, like what could have happened if I hadn’t stopped it had just dawned on him.

“I apologize … I don’t know what came over me. I hoped I didn’t frighten you,” he murmured, despondent.

Frightened? Far from it.

“I’m fine, but we can’t—I can’t, Cruz. You’re engaged, so this will turn out badly. We both know it will, so let’s stop it here, right now. We have to promise this will never, ever happen again.”

His head dipped, inching closer to my face until I felt the tip of his nose brush against my cheek, caressing. “You confuse me,” he whispered, evidently tortured by this whole situation. “I want to kiss you again, but I’m afraid you’re going to hate me for it.”

Never had I wanted another man like I craved him.

“No more. No more.”

“Serena, whatever you decide to do”—his lips brushed against the side of my ear, breathing me in—“promise me you’re not going to do anything drastic.”

“Why should I do that, Cruz?” God, I wanted him, though I knew I must fight it. Even if it was hurting me, I must keep on fighting.

“Because I’m having a hard time,” he muttered. “It’s been hellish.” He paused before seeking my eyes, penetrating into my soul, my heart. “You’re all I think about, even when I’m with her.”

The very mention of her was enough. There was nothing left to be said. As much as it pained me to walk away, I did just that, but before I did, I pled with him for the last time.

“Please, I don’t want to hear any of this. Whatever this is, it’s over and done with.”

And this time, I was going to stick to my guns. If my relationship with Aaron had taught me anything, it was the horrible feeling of being cheated on, and I wasn’t going to do that to another woman. If Cruz was confused, he had to deal with it. I didn’t want to be a part of that, not anymore.

In the beginning, it was hard to grapple with the situation because he hadn’t divulged that he was engaged. I felt as though he had led me, distracting me with the butterflies and rainbows he painted before me. Since then, I had been battling this push and pull between us. However, it was time to end this. I couldn’t take it anymore. My conscience wasn’t a willing participant, and my heart wasn’t a willing hostage.





Chapter Fifteen





The next day, back in the office, I was stunned to find an elaborate flower arrangement sitting on my desk with a note enclosed in a cream envelope. Naturally, I was more curious at the note than the beautiful blooms before me, so with a shaky hand, I began to open it, holding my breath as I did so.

Forgive me for wanting something I gravely wish was mine.

There was no name, no signature anywhere, so I wasn’t sure where it had come from. Was it from Cruz? Archer maybe? Jesus, who would send something this pretty and not say whom it came from? It doubled the frustration and stress.

Mind you, I didn’t want to spend the rest of my working hours wondering whom it came from. After my tumultuous exchange with Cruz last night, I barely thought of Archer to be honest. I was drowned by my own misery too much to even think about if the guy had waited for me or not. Well, even if I had, it didn’t matter. I was in no way, shape, or form ready to be good company after I had scrambled to get away from Cruz.

Taking a deep breath, I was telling myself there were bigger things to worry about when my phone rang, alarming me. Getting ahold of my bearings, I cleared my throat before taking the call.

“Mr. Cruz Elliot’s office. This is Serena; how may I assist you?”

“Serena,” the man said from the other line. There was no doubt in my mind who it was. There was only one man in the world who said my name the way he did.

Nervously biting my lip, I tried to calm the f*uk down before breathing out, “Yes?”

“I need you in my office if you have a moment.” He commanded.

Nodding, I immediately told him that I would be in right away before placing the phone back on its cradle.

For a moment, I contemplated if I should head to the bathroom to make sure I looked presentable. Then I realized there was no point. Being self-conscious around him after last night … Well, it was useless. Therefore, I simply shrugged and made my way towards Cruz’s office.

I had barely even begun to knock when I was surprised to find Cruz opening the door for me.

“Serena,” he said in a tone that seemed a little on edge, which was odd.

Not wanting to dwell on his bizarre attitude, I carefully glanced at him, keeping myself at a safe distance. The tension between us was even more apparent than before, and it was disconcerting and slightly intimidating because I had no idea what would happen next.

“You needed me for something?” I breathed out, anxious to immediately leave, yet I couldn’t help staring at him as if I was a starved, lovesick puppy.

He studied me a while, lingering on my face, eyes, then my lips before he snapped back to reality.

“How’s your day going so far?” he casually asked, as if we were the best of friends.

His bizarre attitude left me on eggshells, but since he was my boss, I knew I had to answer him in a respectful manner.

“It’s been … well.”