Maybe Someday(93)



feet. “I didn’t think you were good enough for

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him, Sydney.” He slowly brings his gaze back to

mine. “You are. You and Maggie both are. This

is the first moment since meeting Ridge that I

don’t envy him.”

He leaves the room, somehow having made me

feel the tiniest bit better and a whole hell of a lot worse.

I continue to lie still on my bed, listening for

the sound of Ridge’s anger to return, but it

doesn’t. It’s completely quiet throughout the

apartment. The only thing any of us can hear is

the lingering shattering of Maggie’s heart.

I pick up my phone for the first time since I

put it on silent and see that I have a missed text

from Ridge, sent just a few minutes ago.

Ridge: I changed my mind. I need you to

leave today.

Ridge

I pile a few things into a bag, hoping I’ll actually

need it once I get to her house. I have no idea if

Maggie will even allow me to step through her

front door, but the only thing I can do right now

is be optimistic, because the alternative is unac-

ceptable. It just is. I refuse to accept that this is it.

I know she’s hurt, and I know she hates me

right now, but she has to understand how much

she means to me and how my feelings for Sydney

were never intentional.

I clench my fists again, wondering why in the

hell I ever had those conversations with Sydney

in the first place. Or why I failed to delete them. I never thought Maggie would be in a position to

read them. I guess in a way, I just didn’t feel

guilty. The way I’ve felt toward Sydney wasn’t

something I wanted to happen, but the feelings

are there, and refusing to act on them since our

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initial kiss has taken a hell of a lot of effort. In an oddly sadistic way, I’ve actually been proud of

myself for being able to fight it the way I have.

But Maggie won’t see that side of it, and I

completely understand. I k now Maggie, and if

she read all the messages, she’s more upset about

the connection I’ve made with Sydney than she is

over the fact that I k issed her. The feelings I

have for Sydney aren’t something I’m sure I can

talk my way out of.

I grab my bag and my phone and head into the

kitchen to pack the laptop. When I reach the

counter, I notice a piece of paper peeking out

from the computer. I find a sticky note stuck to

the screen.

Ridge,

It was never my intention to read your person-

al stuff, but when I opened your laptop, it was all right there in front of me. I read all of it, and I wish I never saw it. Please give me time to

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process everything before you show up. I’ll con-

tact you when I’m ready to talk in a few days.

Maggie

A few days?

God, please don’t let her be serious. There’s no

way my heart will survive this for a few days. I’ll

be lucky if I make it through the end of today

knowing how I’ve made her feel.

I toss my bag back toward my bedroom door

since I won’t need it for a while. I lean forward in

defeat and rest my elbows on the bar, crumpling

the note up in my fist. I stare down at the laptop

before me.

Piece of shit computer.

Why the hell didn’t I have a password on it?

Why the hell didn’t I take it with me when I left

the hospital? Why the hell didn’t I delete

everything? Why the hell did I even write any-

thing to Sydney in the first place?

I’ve never hated an inanimate object as much

as I hate this computer. I slam the screen shut and

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bring my fist down on top of it with all my

strength. I wish I could hear it crack. I wish I

could hear the sound my fist makes each time I

bring it down forcefully. I want to hear it crushed

beneath my fist the same way my heart feels

crushed inside my chest.

I stand up straight and pick the laptop up, then

slam it down on the bar. I see Warren exit his

bedroom out of the corner of my eye, but I’m too

pissed to care if I’m making too much noise. I

continue to pick the laptop up and slam it against

the bar over and over, but it doesn’t diminish the

hatred I feel for it in the least, and it also doesn’t do enough damage to the casing. Warren walks

toward the kitchen and heads to a cabinet. He

reaches inside and grabs something, then walks

over to me. I pause my attack on the computer

and look up to see him holding out a hammer. I

gladly take it, then step back and bring the ham-

mer down against the laptop with all my might.

This time, I can actually see the cracks appear

with each hit.

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Much better.

I hit it over and over and watch as pieces fly in

all directions. I’m also leaving a hefty amount of

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