Maybe Later(48)

“I looked up at my wall and read one of my quotes,” she pauses giving me a sad smile, “The wall in my office is full of them. It said, ‘Conquer your fears.’”

She sets the money on the table. “I conquered one, fear of rejection. Next time, I’ll work out the kinks. I plan on getting this right, eventually.”

She rises from her seat with her phone in hand already tapping it furiously. Then, she gives me a serious look. “Thank you for the invitation. You’re welcome to do whatever you want with what I said.”

Anger darkens her eyes, or maybe it’s a hint of disappointment. I stare back at her. I have so many conflicting emotions whirling inside my chest, I have no idea how I want to respond to what she’s telling me.

“Have a good night, Jack,” she says and leaves.

A tinge of disappointment pinches my heart. Thoughts of losing Amy weigh heavily on me. I swallow the lump of anger and frustration rising up to choke me. Maybe I should go after her and ask, do I call you Amy or Emmeline? Was this a game for you or just a fucking coincidence?

As she walks away, I receive a notification from her application.



AWalk90: Hey, I fucked up and mentioned your name to someone. Fitz recommended I give you a heads up. Nothing from your company or your personal affairs was revealed during the conversation. If you need to get out of the contract, my boss, Emmeline Lancaster, says she’ll free you from the contract without any extra charge. Sorry for being unprofessional.

F. Everhart: Dude, just spoke with your assistant. She’s not perfect, even when she swears, she has to be. There was a small confidentiality slip. If you’re taking any legal action, know there’re no grounds to sue her or the company.

J. Spearman: Is she okay?

F. Everhart: I spoke to her. She’s pretending that everything is cool, but I think the guy she was out with is an asshole.

The waitress arrives with the check, I take the cash out of my wallet to pay and grab Emmeline’s. Rushing through the restaurant, I pray she’s still outside waiting for a cab or an Uber. When I reach the exit, I watch her climb into a black sedan that speeds away.

At her departure, regret tugs at my conscience. Disappointment settles over me like fog. Do I let her go?





Chapter Twenty-Four





Jack


While I rush through the light traffic, the sick knot of tension in my gut tightens. The anger dissolves with every mile I drive, replaced with annoyance. How could I not have realized it was her? Was I so wrapped up in her brightness that it blinded me to the truth? I arrive at her apartment building, park almost in front and ring the doorbell but there’s no answer. I decide to wait for a few minutes, hopeful that I beat the Uber she took. I’m not leaving without an explanation. I want to at least have all the facts before I terminate our contract.



AWalk90: Have you decided yet?

JSpear84: About?

AWalk90: The termination of your contract.

JSpear84: I’m thinking about it. I trusted you, Amy.



The last sentence has more implications than she knows. I trusted Emmeline to be different, to be transparent and open.



AWalk90: You have no idea how bad I feel about this. Never in my life have I discussed the company anyone. I assure you, I didn’t breach the NDA though.

JSpear84: Why would you be worried then?

AWalk90: He might not, but he was resistant when I begged him to forget what I said. I just said I’d fit him between one client and the other. One of them being you. But he got upset and … I swear it’s not worth getting into.

JSpear84: You okay?

AWalk90: Always.

JSpear84: Are you lying to me?

AWalk90: Fine, I’m trying to be okay. He seemed nice, you know. I’m usually a good judge of character. Look at you, you don’t present your true self to the outside world.

JSpear84: Neither do you, Amy.

AWalk90: But there’s a good reason behind why you do it, and I trust you.

JSpear84: You do?

AWalk90: Of course I do. You’re just a misunderstood guy who has to hide because you’ve been hurt before.



My skin prickles at the tension and the confusion. Restless, I pace the perimeter of the building back and forth like a caged animal trying to decide if I should hide, attack, or trust.



JSpear84: Why did you trust this guy?

AWalk90: We had a connection. Call me crazy, but I felt like I could trust him, too. He fed me the same line. He’s been so patient and caring. But he exploded too quickly over something that doesn’t even affect him. I know his kind. They pretend to be nice, and once you trust them, they burn you.



Did I really come across as explosive? Does this mean she truly has no idea who I am? I’m confused as fuck. What do I do now? I take a moment to reflect on the past couple of months. My two options are either to walk away and count my losses or to try to understand what’s happening between us.



JSpear84: Maybe this is all a misunderstanding?

AWalk90: You don’t have to worry about me, okay?

JSpear84: Message me if you need to talk.

AWalk90: Thank you, knowing you trust me lifts a heavy weight off my shoulders.



I’m right outside her building when she steps out of the Uber. She’s smiling at her phone. Her shoulders seem a bit more relaxed than earlier today.