Love At First Hate (Love At Firsts Book 2)(11)

“I’m joking. Maybe five in total. They are all the same. Boring, uninteresting, and not boyfriend material.”

“Why don’t you join a dating app? At least you can filter through the guys, and we could have some fun making your profile.” Jessica sniggers and the other two start plotting with her, scaring me half to death about what they could have planned for me.

“You do realize that there are f*cking psychos going on there to lure people and possibly kill them? Do you want to get rid of me?” I narrow my eyes at her.

“No, don’t be silly. I think it could be fun! You could meet them in a public place, and one of us could be there and give you a thumbs up or down depending on how they are behaving. It could be a lot of fun, and I could live my love life through you.”

“Don’t be silly, you’re gorgeous. I’m shocked guys aren’t lining up after you to get your number and take you on dates.”

“That’s because they are blind and they all suck. Besides you, Spencer, and Valentine, of course,” Haven says.

“Meh, I’m not fussed at the moment.” Jessica shrugs. “So what do you think of my dating app idea?” She grins evilly, and I hand her my phone.

“Have fun.” I’m not sure if it’s a good or a bad idea to actually give any of them my phone and let them set up a dating profile for me, but what’s the worst that could happen? Knowing them a lot of things could go wrong, but hey oh. You only live once, right?

“You’re going to love this!” Jessica exclaims ten minutes later after they’ve been typing away on my phone.

“What have you three done?” I look at them suspiciously, expecting the worse coming from them.

“Us? Nothing, my darling,” Haven says, and they all smirk at me. Fuck me.

“I’ll believe you when pigs fly.” I take a sip of my coffee. “Go on then, read that for me.”

“Okay.” Jessica takes a deep breath and starts. “Nickname: MattTheGod, age: thirty-two, location: Denver. I’m a normal, happy, hardworking guy with a very easy-going nature. I do the things I love, pursue the dreams I have, and live the life I love. I’m on here after breaking up a long-term relationship, looking for some innocent fun and more if the occasion presents itself. I love a good adventure, spontaneous road trips, and doing things spur of the moment. I’m a pretty good cook, but there’s only so much you can cook for yourself. I’m a passionate and affectionate soul, very tactile. I’m never happier than when I’m giving cuddles and warmth to someone special, and although I’m incredibly cheeky and playful, I take care of business and make sure the ones I love are looked after. I do enjoy fashion and made it my job to criticize how others dress. If you are looking like a hippie, we won’t get along.”

“That’s pretty accurate actually. I’m surprised you could describe me that well.” I smile, it’s not half as bad as I thought it would be.

“See, you have no faith in us.” Haven shakes her head sounding heartbroken.

“Well, considering the fact that you three are ganging up against me on this, I was bound to expect the worst. Now the real question is which pictures did you upload?”

“We’ll be nice and let you decide.” Gabby hands me back my phone with a sickly sweet smile.

“That’s a first, you being nice to me.” I chuckle and put my phone in my pocket, not wanting to go through the pictures now. I wouldn’t want to scar them for life with the pictures I have on my phone. “How about we go dress and suit shopping for your big day? Where are you getting married anyway?”

“Hawaii, baby!” Haven claps excitedly.

“Fancy!” Jessica chimes in.

“I need a vacation, this is perfect.” I smile rubbing my hands together.

“My gift to you as my Master of Honor will be an endless supply of condoms for the week we’ll be spending there. I don’t want you to catch anything.” Haven looks at me concerned.

“I always wrap up, babe, don’t worry.” I wink at her and pay for our food.

“Good to know, big bro.” Gabby elbows me.

“Even with John?” Jessica asks as we leave the café.

“Yes, I’ve never had sex without a condom.” I shrug.

“I’m not gonna lie, I’m quite surprised. I thought you’d be careless,” Haven says shocking me.

“Always wrap up, you never know where the person you’re with has been or is still going.” I wrap my arm around her shoulders, and we walk to a nearby shop, walking past the new tattoo shop that has opened in the neighborhood. To my surprise, I see Nate standing in the window, painting something on the side of the wall. I wave at him and lick my lips seductively.

“Who’s that?” Jessica asks.

“Nate, the screaming neighbor.” I chuckle.

“He’s hot!” Jessica fans herself.

“But annoying, you wouldn’t want to be with him.” I wrap my other arm around Jessica’s shoulders, and we keep walking. I can’t help but notice the annoyed glare Nate threw my way. What was that all about? Jealous of my harem?

We head to the dress shop and walk in. The shop assistant looks at me as if I’m not welcome. She’s not worthy of being in the presence of Matt the God. She kicks off and makes sure I know I’m not supposed to be here, which causes the girls to kick off. These women are priceless. I reassure Haven that all is good and head to another shop while they have some fun trying on countless dresses. It’s not a bad thing that the lady didn’t want me there. As much as I love fashion, shopping for wedding and bridesmaid dresses with them three would have taken hours. After all, I need to pick my suit, but first on my to-do list: Nate. Or rather, go annoy Nate. I’m in a playful mood today.