International Player(58)

“Right. And they are very choosy about where they donate their money.”

“Probably because so many of these nonprofits are flaky on detail.”

She grinned. “Exactly what I’m hoping.”

“Truly, do you realize how far you’ve come in just a few short months? You’re doing an amazing job. Two people’s jobs, in fact.”

She nodded, closing the presentation and tapping her fingers against the paper. “Yeah. I didn’t make these changes to make myself comfortable. It’s what I think the donor will want to see.”

“Exactly. You’re killing it. Shall I cook tonight to celebrate?”

“I don’t want to celebrate until it’s a done deal. I’m doing okay, but I’m still no Abi.”

“No. You’re right, she wouldn’t have changed the presentation,” I said, standing and moving round the desk, needing her physical reassurance. “You’ve made it better. You have to see that.”

A blush dusted her cheeks as she stood and began packing up her bag. I wasn’t trying to hurry her off. I just wanted to be closer to her. I leaned against the mahogany and circled my arms around her waist, wanting her close. She twisted away from me.

“Hey, stop that.”

“Why? I’ve not seen you for days.” This woman. So soft, warm, and serious. Why was she blowing me off?

“Yeah, but this isn’t what we do.” She took half a step away from me as she zipped her bag and slung it over her shoulder. “I’ll see you later.” She paused, her eyelids flickering like she was thinking through the pros and cons of something. “Yours sounds like a good idea, actually. And don’t cook. We can get food delivered.”

I shoved my hands in my pockets, ensuring I kept them to myself. “You don’t want me to cook?”

“I might eat before, actually. Cook for yourself if you like. I’ll head over around nine.”

Jesus. Nine? Did she want me naked and ready to perform as soon as she rang the buzzer? We’d agreed on casual, but we were friends as well as lovers, weren’t we? I wanted to hang out with her. Hear about how the presentation went, laugh over Edward’s obvious crush on her. “I have a drink with a contact at five thirty and then I’ll head home. I should be there around seven, so come over earlier if you like.”

“I don’t think so,” she said, fiddling with the clasp on her bag.

Jesus, was she being deliberately annoying? “Are you doing something earlier? I’d like to cook for you,” I admitted.

She blew out a breath. “I just think it’s easier if we don’t act like we’re dating when we’re not dating.”

“But we’d have dinner before I went to New York. We’re friends, Truly.”

She blushed. “I know. But . . .” She fixated on the collar of my shirt, clearly not wanting to meet my eyes. “You know, we’re having sex now. And things can get a whole lot blurry.”

I knew that feeling. But I was intrigued by the blur, didn’t quite know what to do about it. Had Truly decided that blurry wasn’t what she wanted? Was I not what Truly wanted? I could just ask her, but that wasn’t fair because I had no clear answer if she asked me the same question in return.

I stepped toward her and this time she didn’t move away as I pressed my body against hers and brought my lips to her forehead. “Knock them dead this afternoon.”

For a second she melted against me and then, as if she’d fallen asleep on the Tube and was worried she’d missed her stop, she jolted and headed to the door. “See you around nine,” she said without looking back. I watched her walk away, a niggling, empty feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I wanted to cook for her.

I wanted her to come over at seven.

And I wanted her to stay the night.





Thirty-Two





Truly


I put on my earrings and slid my new gold cuff onto my wrist. I’d found the bracelet online, picked it out myself without any help from Noah. It was the first piece of jewelry I’d ever bought. I usually did with hand-me-down jewelry from my mother or my sister. I twisted my wrist, admiring it against the navy of my dress—it went perfectly. I was getting better at not feeling like a fraud when I put on an evening dress, which was ironic since I was about to attend the winter ball, the last event that required a ball gown before Abigail came back. The jitters in my stomach that I felt before a presentation or speech were shadows of what they had been, and I was almost excited.

I turned sideways to check myself in the mirror. I shivered as I remembered Noah’s arms around me, his gaze staring back at me in the dressing room when I’d tried this dress on. His hands always felt as if they were made for me. I pushed the thought aside. Building walls between Noah and me hadn’t been easy, but I knew I had to keep them up if I was going to protect my heart.

It would have been so easy to give in to his dinner-date invitations, either out or at his place, but after brunch I knew I needed to keep Noah in a box marked dangerous and only bring him out when I was in a casual mindset. It was easier to spend time at his place rather than mine. That way I could turn up late and leave early. Whenever we agreed to meet at my place, Noah would turn up with takeout hours early, and I’d have to literally kick him out of bed in the middle of the night.