Hold (Gentry Boys, #5)(39)
“I don’t know.”
Saylor leaned back and appraised me for a long, silent moment. “What don’t you know, Chase?”
“Of course I want the baby. Of course I want to marry Stephanie.”
She smiled. “You don’t sound uncertain.”
“I’m not. She might be.”
Saylor lost her smile. “No. She said that?”
“Not exactly. She told me she was pregnant. I blurted out a marriage proposal that might have come across as somewhat obligatory. At any rate, it wasn’t among the top ten most romantic moments in our storied relationship.”
“Did she say yes?”
“She nodded. Then she puked. Does that count?”
Saylor made a face. “It doesn’t sound ideal.”
“You know,” I mused, “I’ve thought about it a thousand times, how I would propose to Stephanie. Somehow I was picturing a slightly grander gesture. Candles on a rooftop, mountainside hike, words on a jumbo tron in front of fifty thousand people we’ll never see again. A nonchalant ‘Hey, I knocked you up so let’s get hitched’ probably isn’t the stuff a girl’s dreams are made of. ”
“Who says?”
“I do.”
Saylor sighed. She got up, poured the tea into two waiting cups and placed them on the table.
“Chasyn,” she said earnestly. “I’m going to let you in on a secret. Real life isn’t a perpetual series of grand gestures. It’s messy. And often uneven. But at the end of the day it’s the accidental, imperfect moments that will stand out. It’s colliding unexpectedly with the boy you once hated and finding a good man standing there instead. And then a split second later or so it seems you are watching him hold the newborn daughters you created together while realizing neither of you knows what the hell you’re doing but it doesn’t matter a damn bit because everything is exactly as it should be.” She grabbed my arm and squeezed. “The best moments are never planned.”
In an instant my life with Stephanie flashed through my mind. Everything from the first hot kiss in Vegas to sprawling in the living room eating Chinese food and watching baseball. Uncounted tiny moments that all melted together and made a day worth waking up for.
“See?” she beamed like she knew exactly what had just passed through my head.
“It’s daunting when you act psychic.”
Saylor took a sip of her tea, watching me. She put the cup down. “A long time ago I asked you if you thought Stephanie was worth all the ups and downs. You never wavered. You told me she was worth everything.”
I didn’t hesitate. “She still is.”
“Tell her that, Chase. That’s all you need to do. I can’t say I have the answer to every question when it comes to love and I don’t know what’s going through Stephanie’s mind right now. But I know damn well that girl loves you.”
I couldn’t play it off. Every bit of emotion came through in my voice. “Feeling’s mutual. I’d do anything for her.”
“Chase.” Saylor reached across the table and squeezed my arm. “Just tell her that. You don’t need to be grand. Just real.”
While I was thinking about that the littlest Gentrys came running into the kitchen and scolded me for taking too long to return. Obediently I followed the girls back to their bedroom and continued being educated about every last one of their possessions.
Before I headed out Saylor urged me to stop by at Scratch and say hello to Cord. Since Stephanie wouldn’t be home for hours and I still couldn’t find a reason to get jazzed about hanging out on the couch watching daytime television I agreed. My mind was still galloping around like crazy. Anyway I had a sudden hunger for male company. Saylor was a cherished part of my family and I was grateful for her friendship and wisdom. But whenever life threw a sudden curveball in my direction there was one thing I needed to get my head back on straight.
Two things actually.
I needed my brothers.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CORD
Not ten minutes after Creed exited the shop door I heard Chase’s voice in the lobby. He was going to have to wait because I was busy inking over a corny balloon heart that had the name Ryan in the center. The girl it was attached to was no more than twenty. She’d walked in here with heartbreak written all over her face, asking me if there was anything I could do to remake her shoulder ink into something else.
“Sure,” I’d said smoothly, keeping to myself the observation that this Ryan prick must have royally f*cked up somehow.
“God, I hate men,” fumed the girl, frowning at the ceiling. Then she seemed to think I’d be insulted so she made amends. “I didn’t mean you. You seem okay.”
I just nodded and went to work, coloring the heart in black so the name wouldn’t be visible and surrounding it with thorny vines, which seemed appropriate.
In the background I heard Chase joking around with Aspen. Chase was asking her in all seriousness if she thought he’d look okay with blue hair. She told him magenta was more his style.
I didn’t take me long to finish the black heart. The girl seemed pleased by the design but then tried to get a little too cozy with me so I walked her to the front and had Aspen take care of the financial side of things. I was slightly taken aback when Chase jumped out of his chair and grabbed me in a bear hug.