Hold (Gentry Boys, #5)(35)
“All right, kid,” I said to Jacob, “be good until she gets back and I’ll set up a college fund for you.”
Jacob responded by grimacing and unleashing a mighty storm of gas.
“Aw, shit,” I muttered because a second later the smell hit and I knew that’s exactly what we were dealing with.
Jacob smiled at me serenely.
Truly had left all the baby paraphernalia in plain sight so I had no trouble finding diapers and wipes. It was the first time I’d ever mopped shit off another human being but I thought I did a good job. As I was snapping Jacob back into his blue and white outfit he gurgled and laughed and I found myself smiling as I gathered him back up into my arms.
“Glad your Uncle Creed can amuse you,” I said and then I spun around because I sensed that someone was standing behind me.
Someone was.
“Truly leave?” asked Mia. She was fully dressed although I hadn’t heard her up and about.
“Just for a little while,” I answered. “She’ll be back soon.” I took a step in her direction and started to hand baby Jacob over but Mia recoiled.
“I can’t right now,” she said, going so far as to back away. “If you don’t mind watching him I’ve got something I’ve got to take care of.”
“I don’t mind,” I said. Jacob had turned his head at the sound of his mother’s voice but he wasn’t crying and holding his arms out to her. Instead he seemed content to grab onto my t-shirt and watch her from a distance.
I stared at her hard. “Are you leaving?”
Mia stared back. “Just for a few hours.”
A long moment of silence passed as I thought about whether I should keep asking questions. “And after that?”
She averted her eyes. She knew what I meant. But she just sighed and pulled the frayed strap of an old knapsack over her shoulder. “Please tell Truly I’ll be back by evening.”
“You want me to drive you anywhere?”
“No.”
“You need money for bus fare or anything?”
“No.” She headed for the door, keeping her head down, either because she didn’t want to face my questions or she didn’t want to be reminded that I had her kid in my arms. “Thanks for offering though,” she said as she hurried through the door without looking back.
There was still over an hour left before I could expect Truly to return. I set a baby blanket out on the living floor and carefully placed Jacob on his tummy. He seemed to especially love a squeaky play hammer that Truly had picked up for him. When I cupped my hand around his little fist and showed him how to make noise by banging it against the floor he squealed with delight.
I didn’t know much about babies, but this one seemed easy to please. He was curious and cheerful and every time he smiled in my direction I knew I smiled right back. After about half an hour of keeping him occupied with baby toys he started fussing.
“What’s the problem, little man?” I picked him up, checked his diaper, patted his back. He burrowed into my neck and made snorting noises. Figuring he might be hungry, I headed to the fridge to find one of the bottles that Truly had made up for him.
As soon as Jacob got a glimpse of the bottle he grabbed at it excitedly. I paused in front of the open fridge, watching the kid sucking away happily on the bottle I held to his mouth. I tried to remember something Truly had said about using some object called a bottle warmer. But a quick scan of the kitchen revealed nothing that looked like it was designed to warm bottles so I shrugged and gave up. Anyway, Jacob seemed happy enough with his prize so it must be okay.
Back in the living room, I settled on the couch with the baby on my lap. Jacob’s dark eyes studied me as he clutched his bottle. He had Mia’s nose and mouth but his eyes and curly black hair must have come from the father he would never know. Mia had said very little about the man who’d fathered her child. Apparently they’d been together for over a year and his death had been a brutal shock.
“Rotten deal, kid,” I muttered, more to myself than to Jacob. “Rotten deal.”
I gathered the baby more closely to my chest, feeling protective of this helpless little person. Sometimes I doubted whether I had all the right stuff to be a good father. Maybe I would be too stern, not loving enough. Kids needed to know they were loved. They needed the balance of tender playfulness and strength. Fatherhood had come naturally to Cordero and I was sure that if Chase ever had a child he’d be an outstanding dad. But sometimes in my dark moments I wasn’t sure if the same could be said about me. It wasn’t something I talked about, not even to Truly.
Jacob finished the contents of the bottle and immediately his eyelids began fluttering. Before I even set the empty bottle on the coffee table he was asleep. I thought there was a good chance he wouldn’t stay that way if I tried to move him and anyway I kind of enjoyed the heavy feeling of his sleeping body in my arms. I ran my finger lightly across his dimpled hand and figured maybe I could adapt to this dad stuff more easily than I thought.
Spying the remote on the end of the couch I flicked the television on although I kept it on mute, ending up with one of those house hunting shows where some irritating couple bickers over countertops. I was glad I couldn’t hear them.
When Truly softly opened the front door, Jacob was still lights out, snoring faintly. I saw the look of surprise cross her face as she took in the scene of the two of us snuggled up together. Then she broke into an enchanted smile.