Hidden (Nicole Jones #1)(31)

I get up and move toward the desk, the computer drawing me with its invisible lure. I casually move the mouse and it springs alive, the wallpaper a snapshot of the Bluffs.

I glance toward the kitchen, and while I cannot see him, I can hear him. He is humming. Steve always hums when he’s cooking, but it is an absent humming, something he doesn’t even realize he does until I point it out to him.

I am not going to point it out now.

I sit and log into my VPN, immediately doing a search. I need to know what someone will find if they search for Zeke Chapman.

The first thing that comes up is an obituary from the Miami Herald. I click on it and scan it. It is an obituary from fifteen years ago, telling me that Zeke Chapman was a special agent with the FBI and had been killed on the job. It doesn’t mention what he’d been investigating, only lists his wife, Lauren, as his survivor and asks that all donations be made to the Policeman’s Fund. A memorial service was scheduled, but no burial is mentioned

I still hear Steve humming. Something is sizzling. The fish. The refrigerator door opens and closes.

I stare at the obituary, reading it over and over. I don’t need to see stories about how Zeke Chapman was killed and where and why. I’m pretty sure Frank Cooper already knows, and if Steve mentions that my real name is Tina, lines will be drawn and conclusions made.

‘What are you doing?’

Steve has come up behind me, and I tense.

‘Just looking for something.’ I am surprised my voice sounds normal, considering he has startled me.

He looks over my shoulder. ‘How was he killed?’

‘He was shot.’ I close my eyes for a second and I can hear the report of the gun. Who would believe that I didn’t even know he’d had a gun?

‘Where did you get it?’ I’d asked him.

‘Get what?’

‘The gun, *. Where did you get it?’

He grinned, putting his hand up to my cheek. ‘Don’t worry about that. No one can trace it back to us.’

‘Us? You mean you.’

‘I’m not the one with the connection to him, Tina. Even his wife knew about you.’

That had been a mistake. But I’d only wanted to find out if he would be jealous, if the only reason he wanted me was because of what I could do for him. He didn’t believe that I was only messing around with Zeke and wasn’t really serious about him.

Problem was, Zeke thought I was serious. He wasn’t in Paris to bring us back home. He was in Paris for me. Until he discovered I didn’t want to be found.

‘What’s going on, Nicole?’

I blink and am pulled out of my memory. ‘Nothing. It’s just been a really long day.’ I log off the VPN and move away from the computer.

‘What were you doing there?’ It has not gotten past Steve that I’ve taken an extra step on the computer.

I shrug. ‘Nothing, I guess.’

‘What site were you on?’

‘It’s a VPN. It’s—’

‘I know what a VPN is. Why do you need one here?’ He is daring me to answer.

‘It was just reflex.’

‘Reflex?’

How is he to know that the computer is an extension of me? He has no idea who I am or what I am capable of. I think carefully how to answer him.

‘I used to be pretty good with computers,’ I finally say, getting up. ‘Can I set the table?’

I don’t wait for an answer, but go into the kitchen and start taking plates from the cupboard. I carry them to the table and place them across from each other. Steve says nothing as he goes back to the stove and tends to the fish. The microwave buzzes, and he takes out two baked potatoes, which he puts on a plate and hands to me. I notice, too, that there are carrots cooking.

Soon we are sitting at the table, eating in silence. This is the first time I have ever been with Steve and not known what to say. It is awkward, even more awkward than after his declaration that we should get married. So I just keep eating and hope that this will pass.

‘How good?’

The question comes out of the blue, and my hand freezes, the fork just inches from my mouth. I put it down and ask, ‘What?’

‘How good were you with computers?’

I shrug.

‘Is that why you never had one before? Did you do something illegal with it before?’

He is so close to the truth it literally hurts not to tell.

I shrug again.

‘You can’t keep not answering me, Nicole.’

‘You don’t want to know.’

‘Yes, I do.’ Steve sits back and folds his arms over his chest. ‘You’re my friend, Nicole, but I feel like I don’t even know you right now.’

I am quiet.

‘Please tell me who you are,’ he whispers.

I swallow hard, blinking against the tears that have sprung into my eyes. I have no more strength left. I cannot fight it anymore. He is my friend, possibly the only true friend I have ever had.





SEVENTEEN


‘My name is Tina Adler.’

I know the moment I tell him my real name that I am laying myself open. He can now do his own Internet search and find out everything. But if I tell him first, maybe he won’t be jaded by what he reads. Maybe he will see that Tina Adler is not Nicole Jones, or vice versa. Maybe he will see that Nicole Jones is a decent person who regrets everything and had to make her life over and not a person who has been lying to him for fifteen years.